Hillary Clinton and President Obama LIVE from Charlotte

Watch Hillary Clinton in her first campaign appearance with President Barack Obama in Charlotte, North Carolina ...

IWS Person of the Week...Clowns!!

When one is feeling a little down or perhaps had a bad day, and needs a bit of happiness in their life, who better to cheer said sad person up, than a clown?

Clowns have been spreading the joy unto others for centuries, and that is why clowns are our IWS Person(s) of the Week!!

Here is a group of clowns just begging to put your joy ahead of themselves and make you happy...

Some clowns strike fear into the hearts of others, but really?  They just want to love and be loved...

Some clowns are just so out there that you don't know what to think, but you find them hilarious...

Once in awhile, a clown will lose his funny bone and just can't figure out his job as a clown...

When something like that happens to a clown, many other clowns feel sorry for the lost clown...

Clowns are varied and many, in fact...Some clowns are actually outraged and require no make-up at all...

But of course...The best clown of all is the clown that makes us smile, and looks hot at the same time...

Here's to the clowns; may they make us happy for centuries to come!!  And speaking of clowns...

Jay, Matt, and the IWS Radio Players take to the internet airwaves yet again, as they broadcast LIVE TODAY from Noon-2 PM ET on Blog Talk Radio.

Just like clowns IWS Radio is all about spreading love, being happy, and celebrating the good people in this world during the IWS Radio Down with Love, Up with People episode.

Join IWS Radio LIVE TODAY from Noon-2 PM ET by clicking HERE, and share the love and happiness with us!!

Matt Said, Jay Said 44

Matt blahs, Jay blahs, You sigh.

Matt: Hey
Jay: Hey
Matt: What’s up?
Jay: Nothing much.
Matt: Cool.
Jay: U?
Matt: Same.
Jay: Cool.
Matt: Dinner?
Jay: Chicken, noodles and green beans.
Matt: Yummy.
Jay: U?
Matt: Rally’s
Jay: Nice.
Matt: What kind of green beans?
Jay: French Cut.
Matt: You fancy mofo you!
Jay: Hell yeah! I’m sophisticated.
Matt: I keep forgetting that.
Jay: Well, I don’t like to show off too much.
Matt: Good plan.
Jay: It’s like wearing a fancy suit in Memphis.
Matt: Pretty damn risky.
Jay: Damn right man.
Matt: You are a very careful man.
Jay: Gotta be these days.
Matt: People be crazy, yo!
Jay: True dat.

Jay: Hey, the Sexy Sexting Show is #2!
Matt: That’s hot.
Jay: Did it result in any extra sexting for you?
Matt: Nope.
Jay: That’s too bad.
Matt: U?
Jay: Fuck no.
Matt: Awwwww
Jay: IKNOWRIGHT?!
Matt: Well that wasn’t the purpose of the show.
Jay: Yeah, I kno …. Wait. It wasn’t?
Matt: Noooooooooo! It was to entertain the masses.
Jay: A handful of them at a time.
Matt: Exactly!
Jay: Well then. We were successful!
Matt: Damn right we were!
Jay: That sounds weird.
Matt: What does?
Jay: “We. Were. Successful.”
Matt: Oh wow! It does.

Jay: So this week?
Matt: A surprise birthday party for President Obama!
Jay: Oh that’s brilliant.
Matt: IKR? He needs a pick-me-up anyway.
Jay: Our entire staff can record birthday messages.
Matt: Oh hell yes!
Jay: A Paul Piatt w/ a special birthday poem?
Matt: You know he has some beautiful poems for that.
Jay: Maybe some celebrities will chime in too!
Matt: And former presidents!
Jay: And some world leaders!
Matt: And “what will Obama wish for?” thoughts.
Jay: And presents we and others might give him.
Matt: And birthday party ideas.
Jay: Oh hell yeah!
Matt: Cause for us, life is a party.
Jay: It sure as hell is!
Matt: Sunday is also Coast Guard Day!
Jay: We’re on it!
Matt: And Revolution Day in Burkina Faso!
Jay: The most important day of the year!
Matt: I can’t fucking wait!
Jay: Me either!
Matt: Better start early on all those audios.
Jay: Oh shit. There will be tons of ‘em!
Matt: That’s hot.
Jay: Very.

So, be sure to join our surprise Happy Birther-Day President Obama show on Sunday at 12 Noon ET!!!

President Obama and Hillary Clinton Do Lunch, and IWS is There

Holaaaaaaaaa y’all! As you might have heard President Obama and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton had lunch today at the White House. Well, as always, Matt-Man and I were there to snoop around and find out what they talked about. Because we are White Ninjas we were able to get pretty close and listen in.

Who needs drones and NSA data mining and shit like that when you’ve got a lot creep to ya? Anyway, he’s a rough transcript of their conversation …

Barack Obama: So nice to see you again Hillary!
Hillary Clinton: Thanks so much for inviting me to lunch!
BO: You and Ruth Bader Ginsburg are the only women Michelle will let me have lunch with.
HC: I should have had a similar rule with Bill.
BO: Oh well, live and learn I guess.
HC: Of course, I didn’t care enough to even bother.
BO: Are things going to get awkward?
HC: Nooooooooooo …. Not at all.
BO: Good because it always does with Bill.
HC: I know how he wears his emotions on his sleeve.
BO: And leaves his “emotions” on blue dresses! Hey-OOOOOO!
HC: HA! Good one!
BO: 15 years later and Clinton jokes are still hilarious.
HC: Yeah, that’s great isn’t it?
BO: Okay, enough of that. Let’s have lunch.

HC: Great idea! I’ll have a large pizza.
BO: Okay, I’ll have a HUGE chili cheese hot dog!
HC: Damn, you go wild when Michelle isn’t around.
BO: Hey now! I wear pants in this family.
HC: Yeah, tell me another one!
BO: No really! If Michelle were here I’d have the same thing.
HC: You sure talk big. Too bad you never back it up.
BO: I don’t think that was necessary.
HC: You’re right. I’m sorry.
BO: And it’s not true either.
HC: Okay, if you say so.
BO: *stares* I do say so.
HC: *rolls eyes* Let’s just move on, shall we.

BO: You’re flying pretty high in the polls these days.
HC: I’m looking pretty good.
BO: Of course what goes up must come down.
HC: Just ask Anthony Weiner!
BO: HEY-OOOOOOOOOOO!!!
HC: That poor dumb bastard.
BO: I’m just glad I told the NSA not to open an attachment sent by him.
HC: I did … uuuch! No warning at all.
BO: He sent you a dick pic?
HC: Subject was “Standing tall in support of you!”
BO: That’s not all that creative.
HC: It wasn’t standing that tall either!
BO: HEY-OOOOOOOO! You’re on fire today!
HC: It’s low-hanging fruit! Hahahahahahahaha
BO: Ha! Damn Hillary! I don’t know why nobody thinks you’re funny.
HC: Me either.
BO: So what are you going to talk to Joe Biden about in the morning?
HC: I’m gonna tell him that if he runs in ’16 I’ll cut his balls off.
BO: Oh. That might be why people don’t think you’re funny.
HC: *shrugs shoulders*

The rest of the lunch was boring policy talk and something about using the NSA data mining technology to help Hillary in her campaign in 2016. I didn’t really understand it. Anyway, that’s all I could write down before a couple of Secret Service assholes made us leave. I guess the 1^st Amendment doesn’t apply at the White House!

Jayman@gmail.com
Facebook.com/Jayman68
@Jayman_IWS

President Barack Hussein Nixon

Hola y’all! As you probably know there is a big scandal brewing here in the good old U.S. of A. It turns out that the IRS was “targeting” Tea Party groups in 2011 and 2012 putting them under extra scrutiny than most 501(c)4 filings. Any group that files under that section of the tax code who wants to be a nonprofit may NOT engage in political campaigns. They can run “issue” ads and campaign for or against legislation, but they can’t endorse candidates or run ads for or against a particular candidate.

Anyhoodle, our crack staff of investigative reporters here at IWS World Media obtained some of the Tea Party filings and can reveal to the world the expenses they were claiming …

1. 150,000 hand-held American flags. (Made in China, showing their frugality.) 

2. 2,500 boxes of Liption tea bags. (Makes sense right? Can’t have a Tea Party w/o Tea Bags!)

3. 200 boxes of the 200 meter rolls of Aluminum Foil. (Tin Foil Hats for everyone!)

4. 25,000 copies of “Being George Washington: The Indispensable Man as you’ve Never Seen Him Before” by Glenn Beck (Reading material is important for any grassroots organization.)

5. 4 Copies of Pat Boone’s “Greatest Hits” CD.  (This one is a little fishy.)

6. 100 Hoverounds for top officers. (Well, they gotta be able to get around and keep people fired up at the big rallies.)

7. 100 cases of Depends. (Very unfortunate that this had to be made public. Getting older is natural and it happens to everyone.)

8. 150,000 square feet of high-end office space in midtown New York City. (Gotta have a home office)

9. Various amounts of office supplies, party supplies and sign making materials. (Well, somebody has to make those “Obama = Hitler” and “Obama’s Plan: White Slavery” signs!)

10. 1,000,000 “Guns, Guts and God: The Three That Set Us Free” bumper stickers. (Needed for obvious reasons.)

Ha! You know folks; it was just as recently as three weeks ago or so that we all were talking about what crazy, paranoid, conspiracy-theory spewing nutcases conservatives are. Since then we had a terrorist attack by a Muslim who the FBI actually interviewed a year ago but didn’t bother with any kind of follow up or monitoring, all kinds of new information that does seem to show that the White House, State Department and the C.I.A. haven’t been fully forthcoming on Benghazi, a guy was arrested in West, Texas where that fertilizer plant blew up for possession explosive devices, the DOJ secretly obtained phone numbers and information on Associated Press reporters and the IRS has admitted to “targeting” Tea Party groups!

Well, who’s laughing now, huh?

Look y’all. Benghazi has always been nothing more than political circus. It’s a side show with people like Lindsay “Please Don’t Put up an Opponent in the Republican Primary against Me” Graham acting as the carnival barker. I said a long time ago that Benghazi was about Hillary Clinton and 2016 and the republicans aren’t even denying that now.

But, this IRS targeting groups with “Tea Party” or “Patriot” in their name is some pretty sinister shit y’all. This real Banana Republic activities that America is supposed to be so far above. And I don’t want to hear any of that “both sides do things like this” crap. Nor do I want to hear about how badly we need to crack down on 510(c)4 organizations either. I know we do, but to start it by going after THE OPPOSITION just isn’t gonna end well.

The worst part is that once someone does something like using the IRS to target the opposition, it immediately becomes “just the way things are done.” This means that whenever the republicans take back the White House, they will do the same thing and it will be accepted as part of the political circus that our country has become. Everyone should be angry about that.

Jayman3768@gmail.com
Facebook.com/Jayman68
@Jayman_IWS

Jay's Hillbilly Neighbor Speaks!

Hola! Did I do that right? I don’t speak Mexican and don’t think they should be allowed to in this country either. But, whatever. Anyway, this Jayman’s loud Hillbilly neighbor Shastina! Jay thought it would be great if I guest blogged for him and this Matt-Man fella.

Of course, I didn’t know what a blog was. Jay seemed kind of surprised which surprises me cause that’s more credit than I thought he gave me. Anyway, he told me there’s like a billion blogs out there and I was like “Yeah, well if one shits on my car, there’ll be nine-hundred ninety-nine million nine-hundred ninety-nine.” Then I counted on my fingers and giggled and said “Well, you know what I mean!”

Anyhoodle It’s 7 pm and I’ve only been drinking vodka since 8 this morning, so I’m not really drunk enough to be funny, but I’ll give it a try. Am I allowed to say “fuck” on here? Cause if I’m not I might not be able to artic .. arctic … hell I won’t say what I mean. Shit, I gotta go outside and have a cigarette and call my mom. I’ll be back.

Hahaha … My fucking mother is so damn funny. She was slurring all over the place. Woman is 74 years old and she can still put it away with the best of them. You better not saying anything bad about her though or I’ll fuck you up. I’m not fucking kidding. I’m not afraid to cut a fucking bitch.

I heard that Jayman thought maybe I was stealing his paper for a while. That’s pretty fucking funny. What the fuck would I do with a newspaper? I ain’t got no birdcage to line with it. I’m sure as shit not gonna fucking read it either. It’s full of all kinds of bullshit and I don’t give a damn about the news. And I definitely don’t wanna hear about our HNIC WHO-SANE Obama or whatever. Besides, I ain’t even registered to vote or nothing.

I asked Jay, who is a sweetheart, what to write about and he said anything I want. Well, shit I don’t have no idea what that might be. I’m just a simple girl from Newton County, Arkansas who likes to smoke and drink and fuck and have a good time. I’m really loud too. I should have done this in all caps so you would know I was yelling what writing this, but Jay said that was “rude.” What the fuck to I care about being rude? What’s anybody gonna do about it?

I’ll tell you about my weekend cause Jay already heard about it. He didn’t have a choice cause I was standing outside his door talking as loud as I can to my friend. I met a really hot guy on Match.com and had a great time talking to him. We were gonna fuck but we both gotta get tested first cause we ain’t been tested in a while. Once we do that, it’s fucking on bitches. So, instead we just drank all day today.

Also, this damn bitch who lives here in Redneckville better stop talking shit about me. I’m gonna fuck her up if she doesn’t. She thinks she’s so much better than me since she grew up here in the big town and I’m from the country. Well bitch, I’ll show you some of the shit I learned down on the fucking farm if you don’t shut your fucking pie hole. You ain’t no better than me you cunt.

Well, I think I’m about to pass out. What a fucking pussy I am. Only twelve straight hours of drinking and I’m done. My momma would be ashamed of me for giving in so fast. Whatever. I’m horny but can’t do nothing about cause I haven’t been tested. I asked Jay if he had been tested and he said “for what?” Hahaha … He’s so fucking cute.

Well, that’s it. I hope you like my little blog post thingy. If not, I don’t fucking care. What are you go do about it? I’ll fuck you up! You just email Jay if you have something to say to me cause I don’t do computers and shit. God bless y'all!

Shastina 

Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS 

Mitt Romney Reflects on the Campaign

Hola y’all! Mitt here. Mittster. Mitterino. THE MITTENATOR! Matt and Jay have graciously agreed to let me use their blog to work things out after my shocking and devastating loss on Tuesday. I’m very thankful for this and yes, I agree that it’s very rare to see the words “Matt,” “Jay” and “gracious” in the same sentence. EL OH EL Guys! Just a little jokey-poo.

You know, just a few days ago I couldn’t get away with saying “hola.” I would have caught crap from the media for trying to pander to the Hispanic vote. Man, am I glad this campaign is over. I think. Well, I’m not happy that I lost, but at least I don’t have to worry about getting in trouble for saying “hola” to Lupe in the mornings when I come downstairs for breakfast. Where is Lupe with my hot chocolate? She’s so slow.

I just can’t believe I lost. I really thought I had this one in the bag. I don’t know what bag, but I had it in there. I’m starting to wonder if some of the people I had working on my campaign really knew what they were doing.  I’m a CEO, not worker bee so I don’t really know what they were doing all the time when I was on the road. Instead of polling they could have been calling phone sex lines for all I know.

I know it wasn’t my position on the issues because I made sure nobody had any idea where I stood on those. Man, I was so smooth when it came to being pinned down on anything. I made sure that before anyone knew what I had said, I had someone put out a statement “explaining” what I REALLY meant. Hehe … That confused the hell out of those morons in the lame stream media.

Of course there was that Hurricane Sandy and the whole thing with Chris Christie. I don’t know what to think about that. At first I thought everything was cool, but lately I’ve been thinking that I’m not all that happy with him. Nope. Not happy. AT. ALL!

Seriously can you believe that guy? I don’t want to use a bad word here but FUCK THAT FUCKING ASSHOLE CHRISTIE! THAT SORRY SON OF A BITCH! ONE LITTLE WIND STORM AND ALL OF THE SUDDEN HE’S HUGGING OBAMA AS IF THEY’RE LONG LOST FRIENDS OR SOME SHIT. THAT GUIDO MOTHERFUCKER TOTALLY SAT THERE PRAISING OBAMA AND HIS … LEADERSHIP?? OH FUCK ME. IS CHRIS CHRISTIE ITALIAN? I DON’T EVEN FUCKING CARE RIGHT NOW. FOR HIM TO PUT HIS STATE AND ALL THOSE “SUFFERING” PEOPLE AHEAD OF MY CAMPAIGN FOR PRESIDENT IS AN ACT OF BETRAYAL! I KNOW THEIR HOMES WERE DESTORYED AND ALL THAT SHIT BUT WHAT ABOUT ME? I NEEDED HELP TOO! THAT BASTARD AND HIS STATE FULL OF KNUCKLE-DRAGGING, HAIRY-CHESTED MICHAEL CORELONE WANNABES CAN ALL GO STRAIGHT TO HELL!

Sorry guys. I almost lost my cool for a minute there.

I just don’t know what I’m going to do next. I guess when Tagg gets home, he and I can watch Love, Actually again. It’s our favorite movie and would allow me to cry without any questioning or having to talk about my feelings. Tagg has that “Mr. Sensitive” thing going and it really bugs me.

Well Lupe finally brought my hot chocolate. I think I’ll just sit here in my den with the lights out for a while. I really feel like I might cry. This is the saddest I’ve ever been. Okay, that’s not really true. I was even sadder the day Esmeralda, the one I could never have, moved back to Chile. I begged her stay, but she said her family needed her. Yeah, well what about me? What about what I needed? Nobody cared, as usual. Story of my life y’all.

Where did I put that bourbon?

Also, don’t bother me with your fake sympathy. Tell Jayman all about it if you just have to say something.

Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS 

America the Beautiful Hot Mess

Hola Revolutionaries! As of the writing of this post, I don’t know who will win the election. The “data” says Obama will, but my gut says Romney. That’s mostly because my gut usually expects the absolute worst in every situation. It doesn’t really matter all that much who wins though, not because “They’re all alike!” or because “They’re basically the same person!” but because this country is almost completely ungovernable. We’re out of control here and nobody seems to be able to reign us in. We need a complete overhaul.

The first thing we need to do is change the way we elect our president. Hell, we need to change the way we elect everyone from Dog Catcher on up. Does anyone actually live in a place where the Dog Catcher is elected? Where did that “He couldn’t get elected Dog Catcher” come from? If it was an elected position I would run for it and hand our fliers showing how much I love dogs and how much they love me. That way people would feel like I wouldn’t hurt their wittle pup-eeee if it got loose.

Having two main candidates and a slew of crackpots and potheads running for president isn’t really the problem. I’d be fine with fifty candidates. What I hate is that the two major party candidates raised and spent a combined TWO BILLION DOLLARS this election cycle. That’s an outrage. Most of it was spent on TV ads that were ignored, bitched about and even cut out completely by people who watch things on their DVR or online.

What’s worse than that though is how we actually vote. We simply MUST nationalize our voting laws. We can’t have fifty states voting under fifty different laws. There needs to be some sort of consistency here. And to me, that consistency would be to do all voting by mail. Every state would have to send out the ballots one month before the election and they have to be post marked by the day of the election when sent in. There should be ballot collection places all over town and it should be made as easy as possible. Get rid of the rigged touch screen voting machines, get rid of the punch cards, butterfly ballots and especially get rid of all the little quirks that each state’s laws have. It’s maddening and results in people giving up trying to vote in many places.

Then we have to do something about the length of the campaigns. People are already trying to position themselves for the Iowa Caucuses coming in up in 2016! The party primaries drag out for months and months and of course fundraising has to start a year or more in advance. Then the general election is a whole summer of negative ads, people yelling at each other, fake outrages, fake scandals, GAME CHANGERS and all the other stuff that helps turn voters off.

Then we’ve got to completely overhaul infrastructure in this country. We can drive a remote controlled dune buggy around Mars, but if the power goes out for two minutes here in Redneckville, the cable, phone and internet takes two hours to get back online. We need to modernize our electrical grids and move utilities underground. We need to shore up coastal areas from New Orleans to Florida right up the East Coast to NYC that have been ravaged by storms over the last decade. We need to improve the public transportation systems all over the country including building high speed rail to connect major metro areas and we need to repair and replace hundreds of thousands of miles of highways and bridges.

We need to end the wars both abroad and at home. End the war in Afghanistan; we’re not accomplishing anything over there now, if we ever were at all. Stop meddling in the internal affairs of every tiny piece of shit country all over the globe and focus on protecting our borders and our people. Most of all we need to end the War on Drugs™.  It’s the longest and costliest war we’ve ever fought and Drugs won a long time ago.

What’s most important though is that we need to remove the most important obstacle to doing these things. We have to stop letting the 20 to 30 percent of the people who oppose all forms of progress and who believe every tinfoil hat conspiracy that shows up in their email every day. We’ve got to stop appeasing these people, ignore their “It’s a plot by the United Nations to take over and turn us into a Socialist Islamic Theocracy and outlaw Christianity” bullshit. Let the Lizard Brains just stew in their idiocy and the rest of the country full of normal, intelligent and reasonable people move forward.

Yeah, I know. You’ll only agree to this if YOUR GUY wins.

Fuck you America.

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS 

Jayman's Vote: None of the Above

Hola voters! Well, it’s finally time for me to finally decide for whom I’m going to vote for president. For most people it’s a very simple decision to make. Most people will simply vote for the person with the “D” or the “R” next to his name. Many others are single issue voters and vote only for the “pro-life” or “pro-choice” candidate.

On a side note, did you see the slime that Tom Friedman spewed in his column in the New York Times? The one about where he talks about the “extreme” positions of many republicans when it comes to rape and abortion? While I don’t disagree with him, I find it disgusting that the man who cheered on the Iraq War, the Drone killings and any and all slaughtering of innocent lives in the Middle East wants to lecture anyone on the “Sanctity of Life.” What an incredible hypocrite.

In fact, this very subject is why I’ve been so torn about whom to vote for. Normally, given the fact that he has basically done what he promised to do, voting for Obama again should be pretty easy. Look, the reality of it is that Obama hasn’t been that bad. The economy sucks, but it is improving albeit not as fast as we would all hope. And, given the absolute refusal of the republicans to cooperate any little bit at all, (and the cowardly actions of many democrats) what Obama has accomplished has been quite impressive.

But, there are other things that aren’t so defensible. Obama is a fairly weak and ineffectual leader and has continued the truly monstrous drone program that has literally slaughtered hundreds, maybe thousands of innocent people, mostly women and children. He continues and has even expanded the warrantless surveillance program spying on American citizens. He has not made any move to do away with the most disturbing and authoritarian parts of the Patriot Act. He hasn’t closed Gitmo. And, most disturbingly he has a “secret” Kill List where names of people, including American citizens marked for assassination without any consideration of due process.

What mostly infuriates me about these things isn’t really that Obama continued those programs that were started under George W Bush. No, what pisses me off is the way that liberals and democrats suddenly are no longer appalled by these immoral and extra-constitutional actions simply because THEIR GUY is the one doing it. That’s just outrageous and I don’t know how they look themselves in the mirror.

As for Mitt Romney … What else is left to say? Mitt is, without a doubt, the worst human being to run for president since Richard Nixon. He is an extraordinarily dishonest man running for any office I have ever seen. He has no core principals or beliefs. He’s more than happy, without any hint of shame, to change his position on any issue at any time. I’m not just talking about the completely opposite positions he takes on most issues today than he did when he was governor of Massachusetts. I’m talking about his taking opposite positions on issues from one day to the next!

Virtually every position Mitt Romney took during the debates is the opposite of what he has been campaigning on. The best example of this was after a year of criticizing Obama for having a set date for withdrawal from Afghanistan, he suddenly claimed he supported it. Hell, he might as well have spent that entire debate saying “ME TOO!!” That’s just one example, but the list is so very long. There was also his “Let Detroit Go Bankrupt” op-ed which has astonishingly evolved into his taking credit for the auto bailout. And then there’s the weekly flip-flopping and obfuscation on Roe v Wade, taxes, defense spending, FEMA, Medicare, Social Security and everything else. And all those things I said that keeps me from voting for Obama? Romney would continue and even expand them too. Not to mention that they will both continue and even expand the ridiculous War on Drugs crap.

Romney is just a complete fraud. As Matt-Man likes to say, “Romney has no soul.” I think that describes him best.

So what am I gonna do when I get into that booth? Well, if we were required to choose between Obama and Romney, the only real choice would be Obama based simply on the fact that he’s not the lying scumbag that Romney is. But, I’m going to take a stand. I’m going to engage in a one man protest. For the first time in my life I’m going to leave the Presidential section of my ballot blank. There is no “None of the Above” option on our ballot, but that’s how I’m voting.

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS

Presidential Debate 2012...Barack Obama vs. Mitt Romney

Tonight at 9 P.M. ET, Jim Lehrer will moderate the first of the 2012 Presidential Debates live from Denver, CO.

Tonight’s questions will focus on fiscal and domestic policy.  Subsequent Presidential debates will focus on foreign policy and social issues.

So, in the meantime and on the precipice of tonight’s debate…

We brought both President Obama and Gov. Mitt Romney into the Bagwine Studios of IWS in order to have a tête-à-tête type summit in order to discover what makes the hearts and souls of President Barry and Governor Willard beat.

Matt:  Gov. Romney…Let’s begin with you.  If you had been born a black man rather than a pasty white type of guy…what type of black man would you be?

Romney:  Hmmmm?  That pre-supposes that my father would have been a negro as well, and since as a white man living in Detroit he ran Ford Motor Company…um…as a successful negro living in Detroit, he would have run Motown Records. So I guess I would have become the cat’s pajamas in some Section 8 mogul form or fashion. Or I’d have taken over Motown Records and be known today as, Quincy Gordy and/or Berry Jones.

Matt:  Likewise President Obama…If you had been born truly white, rather than an awkwardly DNA’ed mufaletta, where do you think you’d be today?

Obama:  Hell I’d still be residing in Hawaii.  And as a white man I would actually be able to enjoy the surf.  I could swim in the ocean.  Ride a surfboard, and just hang out getting a tan.  You can’t do any of that type of thing when you’re a black man.  Hawaii isn’t paradise when you’re a black man; it’s just a Zip Code.

Matt:  Let’s move to religion…President Obama?  If you were a Mormon, how do you think you would react?

Obama:  Well…First I would say unto myself…Why your mommy and daddy belong to a church that considered us folks of color lesser folk until 1980 or so?  But then?  I’d be all over that polygamy thing and marry Tyra Banks, Shakira, Eva Longoria, Michelle, produce 8,000 kids, and be the first Democrat Presidential candidate to ever win the State of Utah.

Matt:  And Governor Romney?  What if you had been raised a Muslim like President Obama?

Romney:  That’s a bazaar question.  Ha Ha Ha, get it?  Bazaar?  Anyhoo…The word bazaar is a portend as to what I’d do.  I’d probably ingratiate myself to the Muslim community and make millions off of selling spices and tea leaves produced in China and Laos to my Muslim brethren in the kitschy markets of the Middle East.

Matt:  Gov. Romney.  Soft Drinks…Pop…Soda…They can help to define a person.  What is your favorite?

Romney:  Well as a Mormon I don’t consume caffeine, but as a drinker of soda, I do once in awhile enjoy an ice cold bottle of Coca-Cola.

Matt:  Coke does contain caffeine.

Romney:  Pepsi?

Matt:  Pepsi does as well.

Romney:  Well, I do enjoy being in the bubbly presence of the CEOs of both companies.  Ha Ha Ha.

Matt:  President Obama?  You favorite soft drink, pop, soda?

Obama:  Hee Hee…I see you smiling Matt-Man, because as you worked in fast food in High School and work at the Beer Mine now, you know what us bruthas like.

Matt:  Ha…And what would that be?

Obama:  We like Orange Pop, Grape Pop, and Tahitian Treat.

Matt:  Word…And even though you are Hawaiian, you’ll have none of that Hawaiian Punch shit.

Obama:  Fuck that shit.

Romney:  Can I say fuck that shit too?  I mean, if it’ll help me be hip?

Matt: You just did, Governor.

Romney:  Yo, Canine.  Woot Woot.

Obama and Matt:  Uh-huh.

And that concludes our debate and if you’d like, Jayman and I will be broadcasting LIVE Today at 11 AM ET on Blog Talk Radio so catch us LIVE by clicking right HERE.

Matt-Man
mattmaniws@ymail.com
@MattMan_IWS

Barack Obama: It's Bush's Fault

Hola voters! Today I have the very special privilege of interviewing President Barack Obama! Let’s get right to it.

Q: You are very likely to go into the record books as the first president to preside over four consecutive budget deficits of well over $1 trillion dollars each. Do you think that will taint your legacy?

Obama: Well, you have to remember that we inherited that first really huge $1.6 trillion dollar deficit from Bush. And the 2013 deficit is expected to only be $901 billion.

Jay: But, that still leaves two other budgets with deficits above $1 trillion that are yours.

Obama: Well yes, but there was such a big mess to clean up that was leftover from Bush. And, it’s important to lower this deficit as carefully as we were careless in creating it.

Jay: So you admit that you were careless in creating these huge deficits?

Obama: No, that Bush was. I misspoke there.

Jay: In 2009 your administration predicted that unemployment would peak at 8.5% and then be near 6% by this time. Instead it went to 10.5% and is still over 8%. What happened?

Obama: Well, we just really underestimated how badly the job losses caused by the Bush economic collapse were.

Jay: But, why is the unemployment rate coming down so slowly?

Obama: Well, again these things take time. We don’t want to do anything that would shock the economy. Certainly not the way the Bush administration did. We saw how the economy hates shocks with the Bush collapse.

Jay: Switching to foreign policy. You made the claim that you could deal with the Arab world and settle things diplomatically, yet all over the Middle East people are marching on US Embassies in anger. Why haven’t relations improved?

Obama: Well, again, and I do take MY SHARE of the responsibility here, we underestimated just how bad the Bush administration had made things with our Arab friends.

Jay: But, again I have to ask, why haven’t things really improved? We seem to be in the same place where we were four years ago.

Obama: Well, there’s a residual effect of the Bush administration policies. See, things were going downhill so quickly, that it took a while to stop the slide. We’ve been able to slowly make things better.

Jay: Why so slow though?

Obama: Well, you can’t rush these things. That might cause a shock to the diplomatic balance in the region and that would be as bad as the Bush shock to the economy was.

Jay: Okay, The First Lady Michelle Obama is a real asset to you as she is quite popular. What do you think the key to her popularity is?

Obama: Well, she’s a really engaging and charming person. Also, she’s a very hard worker. She started on day one cleaning up the mess that Laura Bush left and has been able to overcome it to make American’s proud of the First Lady again.

Jay: What mess did Laura Bush leave?

Obama: Well, she mostly just got all that George W Bush stank all over her. His disastrous policies affected everyone!

Jay: One last question Mr. President. One of the biggest criticisms of you is that you seem too deliberative many times. That you aren’t really that decisive and you take a long time to finally decide your position on many issues. What is your response to that?

Obama: Well, I think it’s necessary to make up for all the really bad snap decisions that President Bush made for eight long years. His decisions were so quick and with so little thinking through of consequences, I felt that the decision making process needed to be slowed down to balance things out.

Jay: Well, looks like it’s all Bush’s fault then, right?

Obama: Pretty much. Yeah.

Jay: Thank you so much for being here today sir.

Obama: No problem. I hope I made up for any really bad interview Bush did with you guys and have at least gotten things back to even on that front too.

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS

In other news, you guys should totally check out the IWS Podcast below!

Listen to internet radio with Im With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio

Gary Johnson 2012, Libertarians Are Sexy!!

Are you one of the top one, two, or even ten percent income earners in this great land of ours and are sick and tired of President Obama publicly excoriating you for not paying what he considers to be your fair share of income tax?

Or?

Are you one of the forty-seven percent of Americans who pay no income tax, yet daily, pay a boat-load of other taxes, and are labeled by Mitt Romney, as irresponsible, worthless, and a moocher looking for nothing other than a government handout?

Well my friends, have I got a Presidential candidate for you to look into and see if he is for you, and that would be…

Former New Mexico Governor, and 2012 Libertarian Candidate for President, the Honorable Gary Johnson.

Gov. Johnson is a no-nonsense, fiscally sound, yet amusing and personable public servant who built his own construction company from nothing, unlike President Obama, who has a career based on social work, and Gov. Romney who has never really built a company, but instead has spent his entire career carving off and selling out at great personal profit, existing companies.

As Governor of New Mexico from 1994-2003, Gov. Johnson became well-known as a tenacious watchdog in all matters fiscal.  He balanced budgets in the Land of Enchantment State several times through weighing cost-benefit analysis rather than singly focused ideology or the typical closed-door promises of self-interested lobbyists.

I am as far as most definitions go, a fairly Liberal guy, however, I have a huge Libertarian streak in me as well, in fact, I have often defined myself politically as a, Liberaltarian.  And here is what I like about some of the policy stances of Gov. Johnson…

*End excessive spending, bloated stimulus programs, unnecessary farm subsidies, and earmarks.

I am not against an interjection of Federal stimuli when needed, but earmarks and antiquated subsidies?  Oh Hell Yes!!

*Enact the Fair Tax to tax expenditures, rather than income, with a 'prebate' to make spending on basic necessities tax free.

I don’t mind a fair and flat, consumer type tax at all, and with his caveat about basic necessities being tax-free, that’s a plus.

*Legalize, tax, and regulate marijuana, rather than wasting money on an expensive and futile prohibition.

I don’t even smoke dope, but therein lies a HUGE cannabis cash cow into the Federal hookah right there.  Right Duuuude?

*Eliminate needless barriers to free trade and make it easier for would-be legal immigrants to apply for work visas.

In this, Gov. Johnson highlights something similar that Americans don’t really hear about.  We allow bright foreign, college age students to come to this country to get a world-class education, and upon graduation, they want to stay here in the U.S. to start a business and we say, “No, I’m sorry, your Visa has expired.  Take yourself, your first-rate Stanford, M.I.T, or Harvard education, and your great ideas back to where you came from.”  Brain Drain!!

Lastly…

*Government should not impose its values upon marriage. It should allow marriage equality, including gay marriage. It should also protect the rights of religious organizations to follow their beliefs.

Gov. Johnson and the Libertarians have my full support on this one.  Gays should be recognized as legally wed couples if they should want to tie the knot, but the government should NOT dictate that churches recognize it as so.  Legally binding marriages, yes.  Church approved marriage?  Eh, that’s up to the particular churches and denominations.

Ha, and you know what the irony of legalized and fully lawful recognition of Gay Marriage is?  Churches everywhere would be accepting it, because there is money to be made on marriages.

Anyway…While I only touched on a few policy views of Gov. Gary Johnson and the Libertarian Party, I like these principles.

There are more than a few of his policies with which I disagree, but eh…He is a nice change of pace, and…I am going to give considerable consideration to him when it comes to my vote on November 6th.

To check out Gov. Johnson’s campaign website and delve further into his stand on many other issues, you can click HERE.

Be involved...Be informed...and most importantly...Be a voter.

Cheers!!
Matt-Man
mattmaniws@ymail.com
@MattMan_IWS

IWS Exclusive! Joe Biden's Speech at the DNC

Remarks by the Honorable Joseph R. Biden Jr.
Vice President of the United State of America

Holaaaaaaaaaaaa Charleston!! Woooooooo!

I’m Joe Biden and I’m an alcoholi … OOPS … Hold on … Wrong speech.

Welcome to Chattanooga and the annual meeting of the Democratic National Constitution meeting thingy. I’m here to tell you about this guy who has been your president for the last handful of years. He’s a really great guy, this Obama fella.

When I first met Barracks Obama I found him to be so clean and articulate that I didn’t even worry about moving my wallet from my back pocket to the front. I tell ya, I couldn’t believe what a sharp mind he had and how pleasant he was. Always inviting me to come and hangout at his home office and asking my advice about different things he was interested in and I guess had been reading about.

And then one day, out of nowhere he invited me to come to this party he was throwing down here in Columbia. I mean, how great is Barney? I don’t think I’ve ever had a better friend in my life. And while he’s better than me at basketball (obviously), there is something that normally comes naturally to his people that I’m better at …… RAPING!

What? OHHHH!! RAPPING! I meant to say RAPPING! Sorry. Hahahahaha

*music starts*

Yo … Yo … 
They all call me crazy old Joe … 
I’m just a regular every day schmoe … 
You never know what I’m gonna say 
Jump back … I’m might pray 
You think I’m easy to beat
But you’re grandmother thinks I’m sweet 
Stock up on lots of caffeine 
I’m Joe … Biden my time ‘til twenty sixteeeeeeeen. 
Yeah … Yeah .. 

I tell ya, I’ve had a great time here in Clarksville and at the conversion meetings. I love these things because I see so many of my old friends from my days in the senate like Harvey Reid who I had a good laugh with last night. I saw my very good friend Ted Kennedy on a TV Tuesday night, but I haven’t been able to track him down yet.

It’s always fun meeting like this every 8 years or so. I can’t believe how much some of you have aged. And it’s wonderful seeing everyone’s kids growing up too. Did you check Barnaby and Martha Omaha’s girls last night? Wow! They’re growing up right … if you know what I mean. *winks*

You know, one of the things I’m most impressed with is how diverse this soiree is. I’ve seen more minorities here in Canton than in all of my days hanging out in Delaware combined. Heck on Tuesday night there was a really good looking young Hispanic guy from ahem … “Texas” … who everyone seemed to like a whole lot. And right after him was a tall, very attractive black lady who I don’t think I’ve ever met, but we need to see and hear more from her, amirite?

Well folks, it’s getting late so I’ll wrap it up. Bartholomew … Melissa … now Mr. and Mrs. Obamtha … I wish you two nothing but good health, happiness and success as you venture forth into your new life together as one. In the words of Lao Tzu: “To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage.”

Thank you all so much for being here. God bless you and God Bless America!

GOODNIGHT CLEVELAAAAAAAANNNNNNNND!!!

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS

In other news we pulled back the curtain on the ugly side of the internet on I'm With Stupid and what we found was down right horrifying. Check it out!

Listen to internet radio with Im With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio

In the Words of Both Cicero and JayMom, Tempus Fugit

Cheers and a big celebratory welcome to you all on this glorious Tuesday that God has granted us.

Why do I sound all up in the air as if I am walking on sunshine, you ask?

Well…Oh ho, let me tell you.

Tomorrow marks the end of the second year of the IWS Radio legacy.  I shit…you…not.

Tommorow’s radio show marks the point where Jayman and I have been on the air for a full two years. I know, I know….

To some of you, it seems like a decade, but nope, it’s only been two short years of non-stop hilarity and Marconi Award winning radio stuff courtesy of the professional folks here at IWS Radio.

We hope you have enjoyed our efforts over the last couple of years and judging by the recent number of listeners to our shows, you actually have, although the fact that the recent show with Schmoop which has to date had more listens than any show we have done didn’t include much of me personally, kinda brings on a bit of, well…heartache.

(Ed. Note:  Get the fuck over yourself and your expansive, yet fragile ego, Crybaby Mahoney.)

Nonetheless, we appreciate you listening to our show, especially those of you who have been there from the start….the turgid, noisy computer, more than half drunk, unemployed and sobbing, what the fuck, early shows.

And those descriptions only apply to MY state of mind at the time!!  Holy Cow, how did we and how have we continued to do it!?

Deus ex MattJayna, that’s how!!  Huh-uh, I said that.

Our unbridled success has not gone unnoticed upon some in the community of celebrities and movers and shakers.  Noooooooo….

Congratulatory emails and words of praise have been flowing from the non-stop mouths of folks of famous personage…

And, we’d like to share some of them.

“You guys RAWWWWWWK, and if I was four years younger, I’d do you both…at the same time!!”
--Bristol Palin

“I talk of Jayman and Matt-Man as both a blessing and a curse, which comes in handy depending on which audience I am addressing at the time.”
--Mitt Romney

“You guys have built an eager audience base and a successful radio show that is special, but remember…you didn't build that radio show on your own.”
--Pres. Barack Obama

“Not only can I see Russia from my backyard, I can listen to Jay and Matt through my computer thingy.”
--Sarah Palin

“Hapoho oi h o ih jh j poj p oj poj pj po pojbkuya ywre v”
--Michael J. Fox

“God Damn It!!  When is the fucking FCC gonna shut theses two motherfuckers down?  Jew lovin’ bastards!!”
--Carl Paladino

“Jay and Matt are prime examples as to why no woman should be without free and accessible birth control.”
--Sandra Fluke

“I'm really having fun with this new mute Matt button.”
--Dour Mike

"Happy Doo Yearsssshh!!"
--The Late Dick Clark via Kirk Douglas

We appreciate the love that you all have poured upon us these last two years, and we can’t wait to continue our, what at times seems to be some funny, yet creepy and incestuous relationship that would be struck down in our judicial systems.

Thanks for sticking with us, and we will see you here tomorrow, and on the radio once again, Wednesday.

Cheers!!
Matt-Man

mattmaniws@ymail.com
@mattmaniws

I Hate Election Season

Hola y’all. You know what I hate? Election Season! You knew that? Oh yeah, it’s the title of this post. Okay, so I’m not that clever, but I am serious about my hatred of election season. I’m at the point where I would support going to six year terms for everybody and then I could go on vacation to Siberia while it’s happening.

Missouri is FINALLY holding their primaries. What’s that? Oh no, those other 75 republican primaries, caucuses, straw polls, hootenannies etc, were only for president. And, spoiler alert: None of them counted. Anyway, the ads on Springfield TV stations are relentless and completely idiotic. Sarah Palin is campaigning for Cruella de Vil Sarah Steelman and her two male opponents are running ads that basically say “OH MY GOD!!! I’M SOOOOOOOO CONSERVATIVE!!! I HATE OBAMA SO GOD DAMN MUCH AND MY OPPONENTS SECRETLY LOVE HIM! SARAH STEELMAN WANTS TO HAVE DISGUSTING INTERRACIAL SEX WITH HIM IN DEFIANCE OF GOD’S WORD!!111 OMG11!!”

There’s one guy who is running for the part time position of assistant county land alderman commissioner clerk secretary who says on his first day in office he will begin the process of repealing Obamacare in Missouri. Don’t ask him how or if his office has any authority because he doesn’t know or care and neither do the people who are going to vote for him.

And the pandering! Oh dear God the pandering! Mitt Romney goes on a trip to Israel and a day before he gets there Obama announces he releasing millions in financial aid to Israel. Then he announces that he will host a local dinner theater’s production of Fiddler on the Roof at the White House followed by a Steven Spielberg movie festival hosted by comedians Andy Samberg and Mort Sahl.

Then this bullshit story comes out about Olympians having to pay taxes on their gold medals which actually turns out to be taxes on the cash bonuses they get from the USOC. But that didn’t stop the panderers! Florida Senator Marco Rubio announces he is introducing a bill that would exempt Olympic athletes from taxes on their bonuses and medals. Did Obama respond by being an adult and explaining that this is nothing but pandering and faux patriotism? Oh hell no, he took the easy way out said he would support the bill.

Next up are the conventions. Have you seen the speaking lineups for both the republicans and democrats? They checked off all the boxes already. Each has a Latino, an African-American, an Asian-American, a woman, a southerner, a northerner, a westerner, a farmer, a small business owner, a housewife and on and on. These conventions are lessons in identity politics. They will make sure to pander to each and every voting block anyone can ever think of. The only difference is there will be NO GAYS at the republican convention.

And you know what really sucks? It all works. The negative ads work. The “you didn’t build that” ads work. The “pioneered outsourcing” ads work. The “He doesn’t love America” attacks work. The “you people” attacks work.

You know why? Cause we not only accept all the pandering we demand it. That’s right; the voters like to be lied to. We want them to tell us what we want to hear and we want them to call their opponents the same names we call them. We want to be told America is exceptional and each and every one of us is right on the verge become multi-millionaires. We want to be told all our problems are being caused by immigrants. And most of all we want to be told that fixing all our problems will be simple and painless.

So folks, next time you’re bitching up a storm about the low quality of people running for office remember that it’s our fault.

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS

Everything Just Sucks

Hola y’all. You know, back in the day, like a month or so ago, I was a pretty positive person. No matter how bad things looked or seemed, I always just felt like we would all muddle through and things would improve and eventually be okay. Those days are over though.

Everything sucks and it just isn’t going to get any better. We’re in free fall and there isn’t a big air bag to land on and save us. Every single thing that happens is for the worse, not just the big stuff like bad economic numbers, college presidents, athletic directors and coaches covering a child rape scandal or mass shootings either. Nothing is getting any better.

In a comment on the amazing Jo’s blog a couple of weeks ago I said this:

“I don't think people are running out of compassion, I just think the people without any are the ones we hear from the most.” 

Why the hell would I write such bullshit? I mean, it’s quite obviously not true. People in general are way less compassionate then they used to be. I guess maybe I was just trying to be positive and pretend like we’re not going to shit as a people. And worse than that, most people seem to be bragging about their lack of compassion, not to mention bragging about being shitty family members, shitty friends, shitty parents and just shitty all-around people. Being shitty is suddenly something to be proud of.

President Obama may not lack compassion, but he does look as though he is fairly comfortable with unemployment above 8% and poverty rates near record levels for the foreseeable future. Oh yeah, I forgot, it’s ALL the other side’s fault. Speaking of the other side, Mitt Romney, a man who lies with every breath he takes, doesn’t even try to hide is contempt and hatred for those “regular Americans.” You know, the people Sarah Palin claims to represent.

And wasn’t it special seeing America’s White Trash Sweetheart’s three year old grandson call his Aunt a “Faggot” on Bristol Palin’s reality show? Yes, yes it was. What’s that? Oh, Bristol insists that Tripp didn’t say “Faggot” but instead said “Fuck it,” and that she’s not “proud” of what he said. That’s makes it all okay. Also, Bristol is apparently unaware of this new invention in the entertainment industry called “editing” where they take things you’re not “proud” of out of the final product.

Of course how you feel about all that depends on the political party you are a member of. Everyone must go to their favorite partisan blogs to find out how they feel about Tripp Palin’s potty mouth and everything else in the world. EVERY-THING from politics to sports to movies, to television to music to books to anything else you can think of can only be discussed in partisan political terms. There are two extreme positions to choose from, white or black and that’s it. No gray areas allowed.

We don’t need context for Obama’s “you didn’t build that” comment or Ann Romney’s “you people” line. We know what they meant. They meant what we desperately wanted them to mean and it confirms our dislike of them and makes us feel better about our views. Any evidence that we’re wrong is met with anger. We will not tolerate having our world view challenged.

But, don’t worry y’all. All summer long President Obama and Mitt Romney will keep telling us that we’re all exceptional just by virtue of being Americans. So, at least we’ve got that going for us.

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS

IWS Babe of the Week...It's Raining Men

It’s Sunday , so it’s IWS Babe of the Week Day, however…

We’re changing it up a bit and giving the ladies a little eye candy this Sunday, because on today’s IWS radio show at Noon ET, Matt-Man and Jayman will be asking:

“What Do Women Want?”

Perhaps some of you women enjoy refined, dignified, and more than slightly experienced uber-men like Sean Connery…

Or, perhaps some women go all 180 and prefer a pretty little, wo-man-teen-boy like Justin Bieber…

Then again…

Maybe you like a sense of humor, so you opt for a caring, yet funny man, like Chris Rock…

Or these two funny guys…

Some women, like many men, are turned on by scholarly types, like Stephen Hawking…

Or of course, America’s Libertarian genius, Glenn Beck…

Some women, shallowly like to hear whatever they want, and in that case, Mitt Romney is a fine choice…

Of course, some women like the bad boy types and want to hang out with sexy criminals who are trying to destroy America, like this foreign-born terrorist…

Then again, some women just want plain, down to Earth, sexy like George Clooney…

What’s not to like?  He’s cool.

But in order to find out what women truly want in a man, you need to join us live on IWS Radio today at Noon ET, as Matt and Jay ask, “What Do Women Want?”

It’s gonna be a huge show, so ladies…you better have your Glenn Beck/Stephen Hawking loving asses listening and calling in at 661.244.9852, and tell us what you want.

Until today at Noon ET…

Cheers!!
.

Obama and Gay Marriage...The President Comes Out of the Closet

Happy Presidentially Endorsed Gay Marriage Thursday to one and all!!

Cum stained man panties are a-heavin’ and the lip stick marred bras are a-flyin’ today because President Obama announced on Wednesday that he is fully behind, and pushing for the rights of gays across America to nuptialize.

Or something.

I mean, well…that’s what good Christians, right-wing neo-tards, and James Dobson would have you believe.

However…

When President Obama came out of the political closet of cowardice yesterday, and announced that he wanted to “affirm” his belief in Gay Marriage after years of tap dancing around the issue, he freaked many God fearing Christians out.

Because as the God-Fearing Christians know, once gays are given reassurance that the head of the most powerful country on Earth says, “Go forth and marry”…

Gays everywhere will take that as a free pass to move from having sex in the quasi-private security of public park restrooms and homos everywhere will teabag each other on Main Street U.S.A., as The Indigo Girls recite excerpts from love letters sent from Alice Toklas to Gertrude Stein while strumming porn score power chords in D Flat Minor.

You know what I say to that line of thinking?  Of course you don’t, or I wouldn’t have written this, but I digress…

There are far too many Americans who think that intelligent, gay adults are nothing more than sex machines in search of little kids with which to have sex when there are no other intelligent, gay adults with which to have sex.

In the minds of more than a handful of Americans, gays are nothing more than the perverse embodiment of the Devil.

Blow Me, Oh Righteous Ones!!

The idiotic, far right-wing Conservative nut jobs who are afraid of Gay Marriage are the same ones who see black helicopters casting shadows of government infiltration upon their day to day lives…Who nebulously claim government has become too big, and who scream..

“Obama is a Socialist”, all the while cashing their Social Security checks, in order to drive a well-built and bailed-out Cadillac while transiting the Interstate Highway system, in order to roam around National Parks such as Yellowstone, the Grand Canyon, or the Battlefield at Yorktown.

See?

Liberals and Conservative both enjoy the bounty of a nation that is rife with national interest, history,  and endowments, but…there is a difference. And this gay marriage issue seems to apply the yellow highlighter of difference upon these two schools of thought.

In my world, I consider myself to be a Liberal because I believe that every opportunity for personal growth, affection, knowledge, and happiness should be applied and reasonably given to all.  If it is not, what is the purpose of living here, in fact, what would be the purpose of being an American?

Some Conservatives would say, “I agree with you, but that does not apply to the God Given rite of marriage.”

My answer goes back to the Declaration of Independence.

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

And seriously?

If a woman loves another woman or a man loves another man, and they just want to live together with the protection that a legal contract such as marriage or a civil union provides…how the hell does that affect you?

Uh-huh…It doesn’t.  So…

Throw some rice for the gay couples and leave your presents at the door.

I hope Jayman and I are recognized for our work in this area.  You see…

It was only hours after yesterday’s IWS Radio Show in which we chastised Obama for lacking the courage to come out in favor of gay marriage, that he did.  Once again, the power of IWS in full force.

If you didn’t catch the magic live, you can listen to it here:

Listen to internet radio with Im With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio

Cheers!!

Matt-Man

neshobadude@yahoo.com
@mattmaniws