Random Shout Outs to Miley's Boobs and Shitty People

Hola y’all! Let’s. Get. Random!

- Shout out to Congressman Randy Neugebauer (R-eally Big Shit Bag) who went out to the WWII memorial and berated a member of the Park Police accusing HER of closing the memorial. Uh sir, YOU voted to close the government and unlike that Park Police officer YOU are getting paid. What a fucking piece of shit you Congressman.

- Shout out to all the people who are focusing only on the fucking WWII memorial or the Panda Cam and are completely ignoring all the people who have been furloughed or are having to go into work every single day without pay. You guys are the worst fucking people on Earth.

- Shout out to the 873,902 people on Twitter and Facebook who have posted the “If a government employee is listed as ‘non-essential’ then why do they have a job to begin with???” as if they are the first person to ever make that joke.

Hey-OOOOOOOOO!  That’s freaking hilarious! And so original too! BTW, 99% of the people who posted that joke are listed as “non-essential” by their employer too.

- Another shout out to the 1,744,820 people who posted the equally unoriginal “Do I still have to pay my taxes during the shutdown?” joke as if THEY were the first to ever think of that one!

Damn, you guys were killin’ it this week!

- Shout out to all the republicans who blamed the Sequester completely on Obama. Yes, it was the worst idea ever, but not only are the republicans now celebrating and taking full credit for the Sequester, they have all but assured that it will become permanent.

- Shout out to Miley Cyrus for getting naked for that photo shoot so American can go bonkers over a boob. I love it when people do that. It’s amazing how many people in this country have never seen boobs before.  

- Shout out to Sinead O’Conner for writing an “open letter” to Miley. There’s nothing more pathetic than a self-important, washed up, loser celebrity writing an open letter to someone. Don’t you need to shave your head again?

- Shout out to Congressman Todd Rokita (R-eally Smarmy) for condescendingly calling CNN anchor Carol Costello “beautiful, but you don’t know what you’re talking about” today. That will help the GOP with their minority and women outreach efforts immensely. Also, he’s wrong. She’s not beautiful.

- Shout out to Buddy, the mutt I saved from running out into traffic last week for a totally unappreciative owner. When I was leaving today just as I walked around the building Buddy was outside again and he came sprinting up to say high to me again. At least Buddy appreciates me.

- Shout out to the 23 people who have followed me on Twitter since Monday. I have no freaking idea why or where they all came from or anything, but that’s cool.

- Shout out the person who told me I won’t be getting into Heaven this week. I responded by saying “luckily for me, you aren’t the one who gets to make that decision.” She promptly defriended me because obviously she IS the person who decides who gets into Heaven and who doesn’t.

- Shout out to my upstairs neighbor for either jumping or falling out of bed at 3:30 am last night. It was one of the few nights where I actually fell asleep fairly early and was snoozing away. Of course, after he woke me up I had to get up and pee and then check out the windows to see what was going on outside and by then was awake and unable to get back to sleep for a couple of hours. Asshole.

Jayman3768@gmail.com
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Everything Just Sucks

Hola y’all. You know, back in the day, like a month or so ago, I was a pretty positive person. No matter how bad things looked or seemed, I always just felt like we would all muddle through and things would improve and eventually be okay. Those days are over though.

Everything sucks and it just isn’t going to get any better. We’re in free fall and there isn’t a big air bag to land on and save us. Every single thing that happens is for the worse, not just the big stuff like bad economic numbers, college presidents, athletic directors and coaches covering a child rape scandal or mass shootings either. Nothing is getting any better.

In a comment on the amazing Jo’s blog a couple of weeks ago I said this:

“I don't think people are running out of compassion, I just think the people without any are the ones we hear from the most.” 

Why the hell would I write such bullshit? I mean, it’s quite obviously not true. People in general are way less compassionate then they used to be. I guess maybe I was just trying to be positive and pretend like we’re not going to shit as a people. And worse than that, most people seem to be bragging about their lack of compassion, not to mention bragging about being shitty family members, shitty friends, shitty parents and just shitty all-around people. Being shitty is suddenly something to be proud of.

President Obama may not lack compassion, but he does look as though he is fairly comfortable with unemployment above 8% and poverty rates near record levels for the foreseeable future. Oh yeah, I forgot, it’s ALL the other side’s fault. Speaking of the other side, Mitt Romney, a man who lies with every breath he takes, doesn’t even try to hide is contempt and hatred for those “regular Americans.” You know, the people Sarah Palin claims to represent.

And wasn’t it special seeing America’s White Trash Sweetheart’s three year old grandson call his Aunt a “Faggot” on Bristol Palin’s reality show? Yes, yes it was. What’s that? Oh, Bristol insists that Tripp didn’t say “Faggot” but instead said “Fuck it,” and that she’s not “proud” of what he said. That’s makes it all okay. Also, Bristol is apparently unaware of this new invention in the entertainment industry called “editing” where they take things you’re not “proud” of out of the final product.

Of course how you feel about all that depends on the political party you are a member of. Everyone must go to their favorite partisan blogs to find out how they feel about Tripp Palin’s potty mouth and everything else in the world. EVERY-THING from politics to sports to movies, to television to music to books to anything else you can think of can only be discussed in partisan political terms. There are two extreme positions to choose from, white or black and that’s it. No gray areas allowed.

We don’t need context for Obama’s “you didn’t build that” comment or Ann Romney’s “you people” line. We know what they meant. They meant what we desperately wanted them to mean and it confirms our dislike of them and makes us feel better about our views. Any evidence that we’re wrong is met with anger. We will not tolerate having our world view challenged.

But, don’t worry y’all. All summer long President Obama and Mitt Romney will keep telling us that we’re all exceptional just by virtue of being Americans. So, at least we’ve got that going for us.

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS