In the Words of Both Cicero and JayMom, Tempus Fugit

Cheers and a big celebratory welcome to you all on this glorious Tuesday that God has granted us.

Why do I sound all up in the air as if I am walking on sunshine, you ask?

Well…Oh ho, let me tell you.

Tomorrow marks the end of the second year of the IWS Radio legacy.  I shit…you…not.

Tommorow’s radio show marks the point where Jayman and I have been on the air for a full two years. I know, I know….

To some of you, it seems like a decade, but nope, it’s only been two short years of non-stop hilarity and Marconi Award winning radio stuff courtesy of the professional folks here at IWS Radio.

We hope you have enjoyed our efforts over the last couple of years and judging by the recent number of listeners to our shows, you actually have, although the fact that the recent show with Schmoop which has to date had more listens than any show we have done didn’t include much of me personally, kinda brings on a bit of, well…heartache.

(Ed. Note:  Get the fuck over yourself and your expansive, yet fragile ego, Crybaby Mahoney.)

Nonetheless, we appreciate you listening to our show, especially those of you who have been there from the start….the turgid, noisy computer, more than half drunk, unemployed and sobbing, what the fuck, early shows.

And those descriptions only apply to MY state of mind at the time!!  Holy Cow, how did we and how have we continued to do it!?

Deus ex MattJayna, that’s how!!  Huh-uh, I said that.

Our unbridled success has not gone unnoticed upon some in the community of celebrities and movers and shakers.  Noooooooo….

Congratulatory emails and words of praise have been flowing from the non-stop mouths of folks of famous personage…

And, we’d like to share some of them.

“You guys RAWWWWWWK, and if I was four years younger, I’d do you both…at the same time!!”
--Bristol Palin

“I talk of Jayman and Matt-Man as both a blessing and a curse, which comes in handy depending on which audience I am addressing at the time.”
--Mitt Romney

“You guys have built an eager audience base and a successful radio show that is special, but remember…you didn't build that radio show on your own.”
--Pres. Barack Obama

“Not only can I see Russia from my backyard, I can listen to Jay and Matt through my computer thingy.”
--Sarah Palin

“Hapoho oi h o ih jh j poj p oj poj pj po pojbkuya ywre v”
--Michael J. Fox

“God Damn It!!  When is the fucking FCC gonna shut theses two motherfuckers down?  Jew lovin’ bastards!!”
--Carl Paladino

“Jay and Matt are prime examples as to why no woman should be without free and accessible birth control.”
--Sandra Fluke

“I'm really having fun with this new mute Matt button.”
--Dour Mike

"Happy Doo Yearsssshh!!"
--The Late Dick Clark via Kirk Douglas

We appreciate the love that you all have poured upon us these last two years, and we can’t wait to continue our, what at times seems to be some funny, yet creepy and incestuous relationship that would be struck down in our judicial systems.

Thanks for sticking with us, and we will see you here tomorrow, and on the radio once again, Wednesday.

Cheers!!
Matt-Man

mattmaniws@ymail.com
@mattmaniws

Apology NOT Accepted, Nor Wanted!!

Yesterday, Jayman wrote about a growing trend that is negatively affecting this great nation of ours…

Men crying in public.

And today?

I would like to pontificate on a trend that like public man-sobbing, is further leading to the utter wussification of our once great nation:

Demanding an apology.

Now, I’m not talking about people who are close…people who are friends and/or lovers demanding an apology from one and other.  Noooooooo, not at all.

That type of apology is sometimes necessary, heartfelt, and oft times can avoid a sex embargo being placed on the committer of the alleged transgression by the one feeling erred upon.

No my friends, I am speaking about a person, groups of people, and organizations demanding apologies from people who say something that goes against their ideology, or cause, or campaign.

People and groups demanding apologies from another who didn’t even utter whatever the words were that sent the offended person or group into an apoplectic fit of feigned moral outrage.

It seems to happen with regularity these days.  Hell, I can relate several recent examples from this past month.

Sandra Fluke, the Georgetown law student who testified before a less-than-official Congressional Committee panel, bemoaned the fact that she can’t afford to purchase birth control pills, and that somehow or other they should be made available to her.

Rush Limbaugh jumped all over her like a talk show host revved up on Oxycontin and Viagra, by demanding video of her exploits using tax payer provided birth control and calling her a prostitute.

Cue the feigned moral outrage from women’s groups, the Democrat Party, and even President Obama who checked in with her.  They all demanded an apology from El Rushbo, even though his words weren’t directed at them.

Nope…The same groups who truly loathe Limbaugh and would like to see his impotent, cartoonish ass dead, demanded an apology from a man whom they detest.

Oh limp dick Rush did apologize, but that was only so his advertisers would quit leaving him…it’s not like he meant it.  So what did those groups get out of his apology?

Not a damn thing, other than the fact that the world now knows that those whiny apology seekers are a bunch of overly-sensitive busy-bodies with too much time on their hands.

Grow the fuck up.

On the other side, we have right-winger Sean Hannity demanding apologies from the Left.  Oy Vay!!

That blowhard requests more apologies than any woman I know or have ever known.  Sean not only requests apologies, she demands denouncements!!

Sean Hannity wants every bad word said about a Republican by anyone who at some point may have met President Obama, to be denounced by the President.

When is President Obama going to apologize for what Bill Maher said?  When will the Commander-in-Chief denounce what Robert DeNiro said?  When will Obama apologize and denounce what Rev. Wright has been preaching?

Sean, honey?  Shut the fuck up.

I know it’s not much of a stretch, but Sean sweetie, you are becoming less manly than Greta Van Sustern and Ann Coulter by the second.

Seriously…People demanding apologies from people who've said something that wasn’t directed at them or demanding apologies from people who didn't even speak the “offensive” remark, need to shut the hell up.

It’s really childish…It’s embarrassing...and most importantly…

It diminishes the intent, the impact, and the healing power of an apology truly given from one’s heart.

Cheers!!

Matt-Man
neshobadude@yahoo.com
@mattmaniws

Name Calling is Unacceptable You Retards

Hola Bitches! Well, I see that fat, disgusting, drug-addled, gasbag Rush Limbaugh is out there calling people names again. This time he called Sandra Fluke a “slut” and “prostitute.” Well, isn’t it just like a needle-dicked, Viagra-popping, shit-bag like Limbaugh to stoop to such a level?

I’m not kidding folks. Rush a vile, duplicitous bastard. He’s a useless piece of human debris. I swear, he’s probably the most useless woman-hating, prick of all time. The only way he can get laid is to go to a Caribbean Island known for its drug and flesh trade, pop some Viagra and then pay big money for a sweet, fresh underage hooker.

I for one am sick and fucking tired of his name calling. I mean, that fuckwit can’t do anything but call other people names. You would think the idiot would come up with a new shtick by now.  But, I guess when you’re an ignoramus you’re too slow mentally to learn anything new. Maybe, if we keep up the pressure on him, this slimy, puss bag will someday realize that it’s simply not acceptable to call people names.

What that old douche bag Rush needs to do, is be more like Bill Maher. See, Bill is a real live woman-hating misogynist. Not someone who pretends to be a misogynist on the internet either. He’s the real fucking deal. But, women’s groups never protest him. Not even when he called Sarah Palin a “cunt.”

You know why? Politics? NOOOOOOOOOOO! How could you even imply such a thing you simpleton! No, it’s okay for Bill to hate on women because, while he’s a self-important blowhard, he’s not a meanie. And because he supports liberal causes. So, uh, yeah it’s politics. Fine. You got me. Fuckers.

Of course, there’s also the fact that Bill Maher is funny. I guess that’s why he bangs co-eds two at a time. That and his millions. That, his millions and the fact that he always has quality weed on him. But, I think that tells us more about women than it does men. But, we won’t get into that here.

Personally, I’m a little tired of the Fake Outrage Machine™. And, I honestly believe that the Language Police and other do-gooder groups that constantly have a cow over every little thing people say are not helping. They’re hurting. They’re having a chilling effect on the freedom of speech by turning everyone into a bland, politically correct drone.

As a colleague of Rush and Bill, and an internationally famous internet radio star, I worry about these groups too.  What? Oh laugh now, but I tell you what, while Rush might have 12,999,000 or so more listeners than I’m With Stupid, I would be willing to bet we’re pretty competitive with him in The Philippines. We’re big over there. Anyway, my point is, you can’t control people. You can protest. You can disagree. But, going after someone’s career or job simply because you disagree with them politically makes you no better than the person you’re going after.

See, if you’re famous you’re not allowed to say mean things that everyone else says all the time. You’re not allowed to make jokes based on racial stereotypes. Or gender. Or religion. Or anything funny. And if you do, the Language Police will be all over you. And the Language Police aren’t satisfied with anything short of ruining you and getting you fired.

And as for all you right-wingers who are defending Rush with such vigor, go as ask The Dixie Chicks how this whole thing works.

Dickheads.

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS

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In other news we had another classic episode of “I’m With Stupid” this morning. We talked about Super Tuesday, a little bit about Rush and Sandra Slut Fluke and other fun stuff. Plus, our good friend and uber hottie Warrior_Kat called in to wish Jay a “Happy Birthday.” Things might have gotten a little weird. Well, Matt-Man and Jayman might have gotten a little weird. Kat was her usual charming self. So check it out!!! 

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