IWS Person of the Week: Rockin' the House!

It's music week at IWS Radio so our Person(s) of the Week are people who are going to rock the IWS House!

From AC/DC

to Buddy Holly

to CW McCall

to Shakira

to ZZ Top

IWS has got all of your musical needs covered!

Just tune into "Music: The Good, The Bad and The Ugly" on IWS Radio Sunday at 12 Noon ET!

Jay's Imaginary Friend: The Brawl

Holaaaaaaaaaa! Look who just showed up out of nowhere? Yup, it’s my Imaginary Friend, "IF" …

IF: Hey, whatcha up to?
Jay: Oh crap. You again?
IF: I’ve missed you too.
Jay: I don’t think you have.
IF: Well I have whether you believe it or not.
Jay: Whatever. What are you doing here?
IF: I just wanted to see you and hang out with you.
Jay: Okay, you’ve seen me, now leave.
IF: WOW! You’ve gotten really mean lately.
Jay: Why do you always show up when I’m sick, in pain, haven’t slept or all three?
IF: I just have great timing, I guess.
Jay: I guess.
IF: Maybe I show up in times of stress because you need me?
Jay: I NEEEEEEEED for you to leave me alone.
IF: No you don’t.
Jay: Yes I do.
IF: Oooooo snappy comeback!
Jay: Fuck off.

IF: You have issues.
Jay: Doesn’t everybody?
IF: Yeah, but I think yours are worse than most.
Jay: Pffffft … I know some pretty fucked up people.
IF: Do they make you feel better about yourself?
Jay: Only for a little while.
IF: And then you become concerned for them?
Jay: Yup.
IF: Well, that’s a good thing. I mean, you’re a good person.
Jay: You’re an annoying person.
IF: Well, you’re not THAT good of a person.
Jay: But, you are very annoying.
IF: No I’m not. I’m your friend.
Jay: My asshole friend who won’t leave me alone?
IF: You need me around.
Jay: Wrong again!
IF: Have you ever considered moving?
Jay: I took a “Where Should You Live” quiz online today.
IF: What city did you get?
Jay: Portland
IF: The Strip Club Capital of America. What a shock!
Jay: They didn’t ask any strip club questions.
IF: Yet they got it right anyway. Weird.
Jay: I guess it was the “what’s your jam” question.
IF: What did you answer?
Jay: Shakira “Hips Don’t Lie.”

IF: HEY!
Jay: What?
IF: What’s that on your desk?
Jay: My desk has lots of stuff on it.
IF: I know, you’re a slob.
Jay: It’s pretty organized.
IF: Anyway, what’s that blue can?
Jay: *SIGH* Its’ a Pepsi.
IF: I’m so disappointed in you.
Jay: That doesn’t make you unique.
IF: I thought you gave it up.
Jay: I did. I proved I can do it.
IF: So now you’re drinking Pepsi again?
Jay: Not regularly.
IF: And what happened to walking every day?
Jay: What about it?
IF: Well, you were walking a lot. Did you walk today?
Jay: Yes I did!
IF: How far.
Jay: To the mailbox.
IF: That’s all?
Jay: AND BACK!
IF: That’s not much.
Jay: Well aren’t you judgmental?

IF: No, I’m concerned. 

Jay: But only for a little while. Then you feel better about yourself.
IF: Oh you’re so clever.
Jay: Sometimes.
IF: Not that often though.
Jay: I’m going punch you.
IF: Take your best shot. 

Jay: *Swings*

*SMACK*

IF: Ow! You hit me!
Jay: I told you I was going to.
IF: That’s fucked up.
Jay: You asked for it.
IF: Yeah well

*POW*

Jay: What the fuck was that?
IF: I hit you back!
Jay: That’s it I’m going to kick your ass.
IF: You’ll run out of breathe in two swings
Jay: It won’t take more than two.
IF: Oooooo you’re such a tough gu…

*BANG* *POW* *SMACK*

IF: *Nancy Kerrigan Voice* WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?
Jay: Shit. I’m sorry.
IF: No you’re not.
Jay: Well, I kind of am. No really, I am.
IF: I can’t believe you did that!

*POW* *KICK* *SLAP*

Jay: That was a cheap shot you fucker!

*AHHHHHHHKICKPUNCHELBOWKNEEBACKHANDSTOMPSCREAMINGCRYING*

Jayman3768@gmail.com
My Facebook
@Jayman_IWS

Jay's Top Fives

Hola y’all! I was sitting around today, minding my own business and trying to come up with a topic to blog about when I said to myself “Self! I bet our vast and diverse worldwide audience of I’m With Stupid and readers of this blog would like to know a little more about me.” To which I replied “That’s brilliant! I know what I’ll do! I’ll list my top five favorites of various things.” Self thought that was a great idea too. So here ya go!

Five Favorite Mobster Movies: 

1. Godfather I&II
2. Goodfellas
3. Casino
4. The Departed
5. The Untouchables

Five Favorite TV Shows of All Time:

1. The Wire
2. The Shield
3. Keeping Up Appearances
4. The Sopranos
5. Mad Men

Five Favorite Comedy Movies: 

1. Caddyshack
2. Stripes
3. Little Miss Sunshine
4. Fast Times at Ridgemont High
5. Planes, Trains and Automobiles

Five Favorite Comedians of all Time: 

1. George Carlin
2. Chris Rock
3. Richard Pryor
4. Steven Wright
5. Buddy Hackett

Five Favorite Foods: 

1. Pizza (all meat or just pepperoni)
2. Cheeseburgers
3. Spaghetti
4. Beef or Chicken Stew
5. Fried Chicken

Five Favorite Beers:

1. Dos Equis
2. Hoegaarden
3. Guinness
4. Shiner Bock
5. Stella Artois

Five Favorite Fruits: 

1. Strawberries
2. Grapes
3. Granny Smith Apples
4. Oranges
5. Peaches

Five Favorite Mixed Drinks:

1. Margarita
2. Bourbon and Coke
3. Martini
4. Screwdriver (tequila instead of vodka)
5. Manhattan

Five Favorite US Presidents:

1. Abraham Lincoln
2. Teddy Roosevelt
3. FDR
4. George Washington
5. Bill Clinton

Five Favorite NBA Players of All Time: 

1. Michael Jordan
2. Magic Johnson
3. Lebron James
4. George Gervin
5. Sidney Moncrief

Favorite Female Singers of All Time: 

1. Chrissie Hind (The Pretenders)
2. Ann and Nancy Wilson (Heart)
3. Joan Baez
4. Shakira
5. Fiona Apple

Five Favorite Rock Bands of All Time: 

1. Rolling Stones
2. Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band
3. U2
4. Van Halen (w/ David Lee Roth and/or Sammy Hagar)
5. AC/DC

Five Favor … Aw screw it. That’s enough. I’m sure that was fascinating.

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS

First Annual Babe Draft for Babe of the Week

In honor of this being NFL Draft weekend, the staff at IWS Media decided to hold our own special draft for Babe of the Week. Matt-Man and Jayman will draft their favorite celebrity babes.

The 2012 IWS Babe Draft is underway; Matt-Man is on the clock.

With my first pick, over which I thought LONG and HARD...well...at least hard, I chose a woman whose beauty transcends the space time continuum.  An actress with classic beauty who has appeared in movies such as Lost in Translation, The Avengers, and Iron Man 2...Mizz Scarlett Johannson

With is first pick, Jayman selects: Sofia Vergara! Sofia is best known as one of the stars of ABC’s hit comedy Modern Family, but she has been around for years. She is funny, smart and exotic and much, MUCH hotter today at almost 40 than she was in her 20’s!

Jayman made a great call there, and in order to counter Sofia's hotness, I am going with a babe who is not only hot, but smart as hell as well.  Adding a little color and a whole lot of "Oh Baby" to my selections, I pick MSNBC's own Tamron Hall!!

With his second pick, Jayman selects: Penelope Cruz! Penelope is an Academy Award winning actress who can also sing and dance. She speaks (more or less) five languages, is smart, driven and smoldering hot.

Most people think that I can't make the play for the Latina chick....Ho, ho,ho, and ole my friends.  With my third pick of this smoldering draft, I choose the Colombian babe who is an international music sensation and plays, guitar, harmonica, drums, and has an IQ of 140...Shakira!!

With his third pick, Jayman selects: Rashida Jones! Just because Matt-Man doesn’t know who Rashida is, doesn’t mean she isn’t a star. One of the stars of The Office and Parks and Recreation is the daughter of Quincy Jones and Peggy Liption, so she comes by her combination of beauty and talent honestly.

I didn't know who Rashida Jones was, but oh yeah I do now, and I finish my draft selections with a similar pick.  Few here in the States know who she is, but she is Iranian born model and current Queen of all things Danish, Heidi Zadeh.  I would love to make a humus and havarti sandwich out of her...

With his fourth and final pick, Jayman selects: Jamie Chung! Probably a surprising pick, but Jamie is an up and coming star. She was first introduced to us on MTV’s Real World: San Diego. Since those days Jamie has done several TV shows and movies such as Sucker Punch. She currently has four movies in production and she is every bit as sweet and intelligent (she studied economics at Cal-Riverside) as she is sexy.

And there you have it.  The Official IWS Babe Draft of 2012!!

Make sure to catch us on Blog Talk Radio today, live at Noon ET as we celebrate Prom!!  We will talk all things Prom-Related, and there may be a few surprises, so join us live at Noon ET.

To hook up with us, simply click on our Blog Talk Radio link HERE.

Cheers and Hola!!

Be sure to check out the I’m With Stupid podcast! The #1 Comedy Show on Blog Talk Radio!

Listen to internet radio with Im With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio

Why Latinas Rock

Hola Amigos and Amigas! Earlier this week we had a couple of great discussions here on the blog. First, I explained to the world why Asian Chicks Rule. Then Dim did his best to tell us why he loves White Chicks. Well, today I’m here to sing the praises of Latinas!

Here’s why Latinas rock:

They Can Dance:  I got news for you guys. Shakira and Jennifer Lopez are the rule and not the exception when it comes to Latin babes. These girls were born shimmying. Have you ever noticed how they can shake their hips AND NOTHING ELSE? These are the kinds of things I notice often.  And let me tell, that kind of rhythm, flexibility and high energy is very exciting.

They Can Cook:  Latin food is the BOMB! I’m not talking about the bastardized Mexican or Latin foods you find in the US. Or even that “Southwestern” crap. I’m talking about the real stuff. And once you have real Latin food, you don’t bother with the fake crap anymore. I have a friend who told her mother that she at Mexican food every day for a week. Her mother asked “Who could eat Mexican food every single day?” Her reply was “Mexicans?” Ha! Yeah, Mexicans and me!

They’re Feisty. Latinas don’t put up with our shit. Once they’ve had enough, they let you know loudly and forcefully. They stomp around the house. They yell. They scream. They kick things. They yell at you in Spanish. They yell at you in English. They mix English and Spanish. And you know what? THAT is very exciting too.

They’re Exotic and Voluptuous: Latinas come in many different shades and sizes. They can range from very petite to very curvaceous. They, like Asians, have beautiful dark hair and smoldering dark eyes. But, Latinas usually have some junk in the trunk. And let me tell ya, they know how to work it! Just watching Latinas walking around, giggling and shaking, is almost more than I can take.  

They’re Friendly and Outgoing: Latinas have a great sense of humor and are very funny. In fact, they probably lead the world in unintentional funniness. Maybe it’s the way they say things, but sometimes even when they’re not trying they just crack me up. Also, they’re very accepting of everyone not snobbish at all. They consider everyone their friend until proven otherwise. On top of that, they’re always ready for a good social outing where they can talk, eat, dance and just be themselves and have a good time. Their great attitude towards life and general friendliness usually makes them the life of the party.

So, as you can see, when talking about awesome chicks, you can hardly go wrong with Latinas. They are the perfect combination of hotness, smarts and personality. And, anytime you go to any kind of social gathering and see some Latinas there, you know it’s gonna be a fun night! Just sit back and enjoy the ride.

Jayman
jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS

--

In other news, what would cause a smoking hawt, young Jewish girl to feel the need to duck into a closet and call into the “Hoodies and Skittles” episode of I’m With Stupid? Could it have been our discussion of Geraldo Rivera’s idiocy? How ‘bout Matt-Man’s impressions of Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton? Or was it our clever and witty “Molotov Mocktails?”

Well, you’ll just have to listen to the EPIC show from Wednesday and find out!

Listen to internet radio with Im With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio

State fo the Union Insta-Analysis

Hola y’all and welcome to my expert analysis of the State of the Union address. I’ll be firing away at the O-Man throughout the speech and then post this raw and unedited. Well, I might edit it some, but I won’t change my reactions to the idiotic things Obama is going to say.

Also, it’s my understanding that Indian Governor Mitch Daniels will be giving the Republican Response tonight. I won’t include him since I get to make fun of republicans three times a week when they debate. But, I will say I’m so happy that Newt’s success has allowed Gov. Daniels to make a comeback and forced everyone to go back to pretending he’s not a fucking weirdo.

Okay, everyone’s in the building! LET’S DO IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!

Ahem. He’s taking his time getting to the podium. I guess I’ll have another beer.

Whoa! That wasn’t a “FRIENDZONE” hug he just gave Gabby Giffords.

John Boehner is still the darkest man in the room.

Okay, here we go.  … DRINK!!

I honestly thought there was at least an outside chance Obama would show up wearing a glittery jacket and just do lounge songs. No such luck. Apparently he’s gonna be all serious about this shit.

The State of the Union is? … Strong? Not fucking hardly dude.

Opening by praising the military and reminding everyone he had Bin Laden killed. If you don’t applaud you hate America more than Obama does.

“An economy built to last, where hard work pays off, and responsibility is rewarded.” – Pfffffft. Yeah right.

“… a blueprint for an economy that’s built to last – an economy built on American manufacturing, American energy, skills for American workers, and a renewal of American values.” – Yeah, I think that horse has already left the barn buddy.

I’m glad I didn’t tell you guys to drink every time he uses the word “responsibility.” That would have been down-right irresponsible of me.

Lots of talk of “tax equity.” It’s almost as if he expects to run against Romney in the fall.

I wonder if any republican will use the words “Class Warfare” to describe Obama’s speech.

If I ever attend a SotU I’m going to bring a laser pointer with me to see if I can freak out the Secret Service.

Let’s break for a little song and dance routine from Shakira…

General Moters is #1 again and Mitt Romney is a big fat poopy head!

“What’s happening in Detroit can happy anywhere. Cleveland. Pittsburgh.” – IT ALREADY HAS!!

We’re still talking about the auto industry. We get it. You got one right. Thanks. Let’s move on.

A Trade Enforcement Unit! We’re gonna let China have it! Finally. Maybe. We’ll see.

1^st Human Interest Story: “Jayman is a guy who is fast becoming a HUGE internet celebrity, yet he still has no groupies. My administration will NOT LET THIS STAND! We’re going to assign some of the daughters of legal age of Newt and Bill Clinton’s groupies to him. It’s only fair.”

“Unemployment, Reemployment, ME-employment.”

If we had done something about immigration reform when we should have, Mitt Romney’s family never would have moved here from Mexico! 

John Kerry looks like our economy!

“Blah, blah, blah … Energy strategy.” Yeah, yeah whatever. Justified comes on in 20 minutes. Pick up the pace.

Transportation projects! Does this mean his going to fix my car?

Oh great. Now he wants to fix the mortgage crisis that he could have fixed already but caved to both dems and repubs in ’09 on fixing the bankruptcy bill.

Obama keeps saying he “won’t go back.” That’s great, but he isn’t going forward either.

Joe Biden either has a cold and keeps eating lozenges or he has a very serious Vicodin habit.

The debt, taxes and other shit. I’m not gonna lie. I’m running out of energy here.

Sorry, I had to take a break to give Christine O’Donnell some shit on Twitter.

Now, it’s mostly “republicans suck.” I forget, is this an election year?

“You can call it ‘Class Warfare’ all you want.” – GOP response: You’re on!

How fucking long is this speech? GAWD!

Has Obama updated us on Demi Moore’s condition?

IRAN!!

ISRAEL!!

And yeah, that’s pretty much it. More military is great, America is great stuff you’ve heard before and will again. Okay, that’s it, I’m going to watch Justified now. Thanks!

Jayman
email: jayman3768@gmail.com
twitter: @Jayman_IWS