Sarah Palin™ Kicks Off The Weekend for IWS

Hi Y’all, and Happy Weekend to ya!!

You’re probably askin’ yourself…

Is that Sarah Palin™ on the IWS website?  And I have to tell ya…

Darn Right it is!!  Ha!!  You thought I was gonna say, “You Betcha!!”, didn’t ya?

I’m fillin’ in for Matt-Man today because he drank a bottle of Wild Irish Rose last night and he doesn’t drink it very often anymore.  Well let this mama bear tell ya…It knocked him on his derri--, um his dery--, er…his…ass.

Seems to me that Matt-Man should have had a tea party last night rather than a gutter wine party, but that’s just me.  Thank God Bristol Palin™ wasn’t there with him, because she would be waking up pregnant right about now.  Anyhoo….

We have a huge weekend on tap this weekend.  Tomorrow is the running of the 2,013 Kentucky Derby.  Can you even imagine that?  The earliest Kentucky Derbies involved powerful horses pulling chariots piloted by the likes of Ben-Her and Julius Kaiser.  It’s true.

And guess what?  There is going to be not only a cowgirl riding one of the horses this year, there is going to be a black fella riding one.  Which can mean only one thing…

President Obama has instituted oppressive government quotas on one of the last remaining pieces of Americana and freedom that is the Kentucky Derby.  It wasn’t good enough that black people happily jockey lawns, Obama mandated that they be put atop fine thoroughbreds as well.

I think that since the President failed to take the guns from the hands of white people, he decided to put Mexican jockeys out of work.  Which is funny, since he seems to want to let every darn wetback into this country.  What a freedom hating feminine hygiene product he is.

But I digest…

On Sunday, there will be a lot of parties taking place in honor of Cinco de Mayo.  In case you are unfounded, Cinco de Mayo is the celebration of Richard Hellmann’s invention of mayonnaise in 1905.  I have no idea why, but I think the celebration should be referred to as 19-0-Cinco!!

But that’s just me, Sarah Palin™

I am always amazed as to why so many Mexicans celebrate Cinco de Mayo because I have never seen anyone put mayo on a taco or burrito, or that one thing…a….chimney chonga?  Crazy names!!

Another big thing on Sunday?  Jay and Matt will be doing their wacky IWS Radio show from Noon-2 P.M. ET on Blog Talk Radio.  Ha!!  Those two are crazy funny, and they have a couple of guests this week.

They will be hanging out with Dana who recently had sleeve gastrectomy surgery in order to get her weight under control.  She is going to talk about they whys, hows, and wheretofores that she did this.  It’s goin’ to be interesting, but I already know one thing.  The why?

Obamacare forced her against her will to have it done, and you and I are paying for it!!  Yep, Sarah Palin™ just said that out loud.

They will also be talking to a real live Mexican named Luis who is one of the Latino types that celebrates Cinco de Mayo.  I bet Luis, if that’s his real name, will be talking to Jay and Matt on his Obama Phone while eating tacos and burritos purchased with is EBT Card!!

Anyhoo…As you know now, it’s gonna be a HUGE weekend and I hope y’all hang out with IWS Radio Sunday and enjoy your Derby de Cinco de Dana de Luis de IWS Radio weekend.

My man-slave Todd and I, Sarah Palin™ will be in Houston for the NRA Conference, enjoying trigger finger excitement and Chik-fil-A sammiches.

Until Matt-Man passes out early again,

Sarah Palin™

mattmaniws@ymail.com
@mattman_iws

Justin's Defense of Horse Racing

On Tuesday Jayman posted about horse racing's problems with abuse and corruption. Today, Justin in Lexington posts his defense of horse racing.

Office of @_JustinHenry_

123 Thoroughbred Ave

Lexington, Great Commonwealth of KY

Good Evening? Morning? I’m Not Sure,

Let me preface this by saying I am not a writer nor a blogger.  My name is Justin, I don’t know how to blog so I decided to write my rebuttal to Jay in a formal letter.  This is not important but I feel that I’m pseudo blogging so I can say that.  Also, I am in no way representative of anybody but myself.

I know Jay via Twitter.  If I remember correctly we both replied to the same re-tweet or something like that.  I’m not in love with Jay so it’s not really a milestone in my life, but I think that’s what happened.  Honestly I don’t read his blog regularly.  But I don’t do a lot of things regularly.  One thing I do like to do is argue.  Jay does too.

I knew in advance that he didn’t like the horse racing industry.  I myself am a Kentucky native.  So naturally I took exception to that.  But I always thought Jay just likes to find random shit to be outraged about like drones so I thought I’d take him up on the argument.  So here we are.

Also, I had no idea Jay was a “Libertarian” until today.   Seriously.  Anyways, on to the rebuttal.

I used to bet a lot.  Not on horses but on professional and collegiate sports.  It was a time when I worked second shift.  So when I got off work it was west coast basketball that was on due to the fact that it was late.  Next thing you know, I know everything about Washington and UCLA and how I feel they shoot too many jump shots.  This is also the time of Adam Morrison.

I hated him.  I hated his long hair, his emotion (he cried a lot), also hated Gonzaga in general.  So naturally I like to bet against him and Gonzaga because I hate the program.  Their games were always televised and they were a high profile program. 

I would bet against the spread, stupid Morrison would go crazy and Gonzaga would beat the spread.  I think Gonzaga will win and stupid hippy Morrison would miss a meaningless free throw.  I remember one night where I bet with him and he did miss a meaningless free throw and St. Mary’s (I believe) threw up a meaningless heave that went in at the buzzer to kill the spread.   I lost. 

That’s the nature of gambling, it’s a gamble.  Jay’s friend was kind of right, something wasn’t right.  He lost a bet, and something wasn’t right.  That feeling he felt was that he lost.  It’s easy to blame a “fix”.  Some people, including me and Jay’s friend, are just bad gamblers.

Except for poker, I challenge any of you people to join a table me at a poker table.

Moving on.

How is your Johnsonville Sausage made?  We all know it’s delicious.  But, what about poor Wilbur?  This guy is delicious.  How many of these guys go on to greener pastures?  Pretty sure none, unless they are your pet they end up in your Johnsonville Sausage or what the hell other pizza topping  Matt is eating at the time. 

Now don’t get me wrong.  I am a Kentucky guy so it’s natural for me to come off like this, I get that.  I will say that I don’t hunt.  I’m not a gun guy, which I’m now learning Jay must be because he is a “libertarian”.   I don’t have a problem with hunting, just personally don’t get it and would never do it.  I do love animals.

This is the point where I disappoint Jay because I really won’t debate him on how the ugly side of this industry can be at some times.  Reason being is that I feel if I’m going to take that leap then next thing you know I’m debating crazy PETA people about my love for taco’s and I have absolutely no interest in that.

I won’t provide specific studies about the industries economic impact on my fellow Kentuckians because I’m too lazy and numbers confuse me.  I do know that it is immense and generates a lot of money in a state that doesn’t have much.  How do I know?  I live in the Horse Capital of the World.

Again, I do love animals, notably horses.  But I like people more and feeding families is important.  Now if you happen to provide some numbers that the industry isn’t incredibly helpful to my fellow Kentuckians (which I doubt you can) then I probably still wouldn’t care.

I will finish by noting that Jay did not enjoy the track for the most part.  Which, is perfectly fine.  I don’t know what a race track in Arkansas is like.   I do, however, and invite Jay to Keeneland for one meet and I will show him around.  If the scenery, atmosphere and excitement doesn’t change his mind, than we will just have to agree to disagree.   We’ve done it before, no biggie.

Regards,

@_JustinHenry_

P.S. Enjoy the Derby, get drunk and have fun.  I know I will. If you really like it keep up with rest of the Triple Crown.

Kentucky Derby, Cinco de Mayo, and Shenanigans

Cheeeeeeers and Happy Hump Day folks...

Y'know?  Yesterday Jayman railed against the sport that is horse racing, and tomorrow?  Our special blog guest Justin Henry will offer the opposite view.

In the meantime...

I am the Matt-Man, and I don't care either way; I just want to make your Kentucky Derby and Cinco de Mayo weekend well worth while...

Y'know?  The Kentucky Derby and Cinco de Mayo mean one thing...Party Time!!

And I am here to offer up to you some party faves...

Well, as it is not only Derby weekend, but Cinco de Mayo as well, let us blend a very fine food course along the many furlongs of life...

First take some biscuits and heavily butter them...

Add some beans, curn, tomatoes, and taco seasoning to the skillet...

Watch it cook, marinate, and otherwise juice out...

and then...brown the sausage...

Are ya feeling me yet?

And then throw it all together, cook it, and say, "Happy Cinco de Mayo!!"

Your guests will give you dos thumbs up!!

You can eat this treat while rooting on your favorite horse during the Kentucky Derby, in fact...the meat in the meal may be your fave Kentucky Derby entry!!  Score!!

Well there ya go...Some helpful culinary advice from IWS Radio.

Or something.

Cheers!!

Matt-Man
mattmaniws@ymail.com
@mattman_iws

Horse Racing is all Animal Abuse and Corruption

Hola! A few years back I had a coworker who had just turned 21. Like all just turned 21 year old, he wanted to do two things immediately. 1. Buy alcohol legally and 2. Gamble. So, he decided to take his girlfriend to Hot Springs, AR to go to the horse races. After he got back I asked him how he did and he told me that he pretty much lost all his money. Then he turned to me with a very confused look on his face and said “You know, several times when it looked like someone was cruising to victory, they would actually pull up and end up finishing out of the money.”

Imagine that. Horseracing … FIXED!? Say it isn’t so! Next you’ll tell me that boxing is fixed too.

I have been to the horse races several times. I’ve never really won any money at them because I don’t know

dick about it. I always buy the advice sheets, check the racing report in the paper and then take wild guesses as to which horse might win. But, I made a day of it, ate nachos, hot dogs, corned beef sandwiches and drank lots of beer to make up for the lack of winning. I enjoyed the races but there was always something about the whole thing that was kind of … unseemly.

Anyone who knows me knows that when it comes to vices like drinking, smoking, sex and gambling, my libertarian side comes out. Do I know that gambling preys on the poor and that horse tracks (and especially dog tracks) attract a “bad element?” And do I know that in so many places horse tracks (and especially dog tracks) are surrounded by drug houses, strip clubs and adult “theaters?” Yes, and I don’t care.

The problem with horse racing is its level of corruption and the treatment of the horses. Anytime you have a sport that is mostly rich people competing and there is enormous amounts of money at stake, you’re gonna have a lot of cheating and corruption. I think as a society we’ve just accepted this kind of thing, but we really shouldn’t because it’s the greed and corruption that causes the abuse of the animals.

Owners and trainers shoot the horses up with all kinds ofdrugs and growth hormones so they can race them earlier and more often than they should. You might claim NFL, MLB and NBA guys are shooting up with HGH too and that’s true. But, humans have the ability to decide for themselves to take the risk of HGH and the oppoeable thumbs to give themselves the shot. Horses don’t have that. They have to just take it. Hundreds of racehorses are severely injured or killed while racing each year.

When you watch the Kentucky Derby you’ll see all kinds of video of retired racehorses living out their

twilight years in Horse Heaven. They get put out to stud and just run free in the bluegrass fields and have sex all day every day. But for every retired racehorse that is living that life hundreds, if not thousands are simply run until they completely breakdown and are then shipped off to the glue factory.

“These horses are born to run?” True, but they’re not born to race. They’re trained to race and that training is brutal. They start them before their bones have fully formed, shoot them full of drugs and run them hard very early and often. Once they are no longer any use to the owners, the horses are then disposed of. The lucky ones are placed at a retired horse park and do live good lives. But, the vast majority of them are sold off to other people who continue to try to make money off racing them (either legally or in illegal match races) or are sold off to people who will transport them to Canada, Mexico or Asia to be slaughtered.

It’s possible for someone to go to the races and enjoy the sport and the betting all that great stuff, but we all need to remember what we’re also supporting when we do so.

Jayman3768@gmail.com
Facebook.com/Jayman68
@Jayman_IWS

*On Thursday good friend of IWS Radio, Justin in Lexington will guest post here in support of horseracing.