Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Being Both OCD and ADD

Hola Bit … Uh, could you guys all get seated and settle down as I’m very easily distracted. And Matt-Man, could you stop pacing for a minute? It makes me nervous. Do you guys think a person can be both OCD and ADD? Or do those thing … Look, I gotta ask you stop fidgeting around and kind of pay attention here. Enough of this shuffling papers and looking over at the TV while reading my post. It really does throw me off. 

Okay, Knight may continue to adjust her lingerie, but the rest of you stop it. 

How do they get those sail boat models in bottles? I mean, I don’t see any hinges or place on the bottle where they snap together or anything. Shit, I stare at those things for hours trying to figure it out. Never have. 

Anyway, the point of this post is to ask why is that I’m so easily distracted, but also kind of focused on finishing the task at hand. Like I start on a blog post and feel like I should finish it real fast like, but then I see someone post a link on Twitter to a pic of Lindsay Lohan and her mother making out and, well I gotta go look at that pic and then I gotta tweet it and then post it on the official IWS Tumblr and answer fan mail over there and then all of the sudden I remember that I had a fucking blog post started somewhere. 

I think what I’m going to do is turn off the TV and close out all other programs on my laptop so I can finish this post. But first, I need a Pepsi. 

*Goes to the kitchen to get a Pepsi. Also grabs some tortilla chips and then realizes that the fridge is looking a little empty so decides to make a shopping list. Then empties the dishwasher cause he’s right there anyway. Finally returns to his computer 15 minutes later and then realizes he left the Pepsi and bowl of chips on the counter. Pepsi is warm now. *

You see what I mean? Hold on, I have a text I need to answer. 

*Answers text. Goes to Google to search for “Both ADD and OCD. Ends up on YouTube searching for New Orleans Jazz music and videos of kittens. Goes to get the Pepsi that is now cool again and realizes he never opened it and could have just gotten a different one and put the one that was getting warm back for another time. Comes back to finally finish this post. Bowl of tortilla chips are still sitting on the counter.*

Honestly, I don’t know why I never get anything done. I get a lot of things started, but finishing seems to be a problem. That grocery list I made? I’ll forget something, then I’ll go back the next day to get it, and instead I’ll get three other things and still forget to get the thing I originally wanted. 

Life is such a struggle. I have all these great ideas and plans and then things come up. Not important things, but things that demand my atten … hold on … time for Jeopardy! I’ll get back to this in a bit.
*Returns to finish blog post two days later* 

It’s not really that I have trouble focusing, it’s that I have trouble finishing. I get started reading blogs and I feel like I’ve got to finish reading each of them RIGHT FUCKING NOW. I check to see if it’s my turn in WWF and I have to sit there for God knows how long to play my turn in every single game. It doesn’t matter that I was only going to play my turn against one person and that I was in the middle of doing something else. Of course, I don’t play my turn in every game because I’ll see a tweet linking to an article I want to read or whatever. And then several minutes later I’ll get a message asking if I would like to play my turn in WWF sometime soon. What game? Oh yeah, that game! Sheesh. 

But, sometimes I do get things done. Like our Blogroll is up and running. It even has its own page! How fucking sweet is that? So, check it out and if you aren’t on there and think you should be, just let me know. I’ll update immediately. Or as soon as I get around to it. 

And, one other thing, I’m With Stupid now has a Google Voice Number that you can call and leave a voicemail message on. We can then download the messages and play them on the show and/or post them here and on the Tumblr page. It’ll be fun! Do it! 

Here’s the number: 937.387.8597

Admit it, you thought I would forget to post the number, didn’t you? 


Beth said...

Oh honey, I'm the same way. Could be because I behave like a twelve year old though. Hmmm...

Beth said...

Wait...you have a dishwasher?

I'm With Stupid said...

It's hard being you Jayman, and glad that I am nothing like that. By the way, I think we do a show today at 11 AM EDT. Just thought I'd remind you. I remembered myself when I saw the sticky note on my table indicating that. It was next to the note reminding me to wear pants. Cheers!!


Knight said...

Thanks Jay because this lace is itchy and I need to adjust.

Your problems remind me of my boss. I think what you really need is to hire me as your assistant. You can start your projects and I'll do the follow through. Team work baby. Oh I'm not signing the pre-nup.

Jay said...

Beth: I like to think that it's because I'm sooooooo smart and my mind is soooooooo active that I get distracted easily. That makes it all sound better.

Matt: The little post-it notes were probably the greatest invention of all time.

Knight: I have SEVERAL positions available for you. Hey-OOOOO!

Also, I would drop the pre-nup requirement for you. You know that. ;-)

MysteryChick said...

I was changing my sheets the other day and tripped over a couple of books so I decided to put them on the shelf. When I did that I realized that the books needed to be alphabetized and started doing that when I came across a cookbook which needed to be put back in the kitchen but then I saw a recipe I wanted to make and looked in the fridge to be sure I had the ingredients, when I didn't I started a grocery list and then had to check the bathroom to see if I needed toilet paper...and so on and so on. I'm sure you won't be surprised that when I went to get into bed that night I had to finish changing the sheets.

Jay said...

MC: I'm pretty sure you and I should get married now. We're perfect for each other.

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