Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Bored Like Me


Hola y’all! Well, I got nothing. Nada. Zilch. Not a damn thing. There’s just nothing going on. I mean, there’s stuff going on, but nothing fun or interesting to blog about. It’s the dog days of summer. Maybe we should have taken the month of August off like the ladies of The View do. Nawww.

Thank God there’s football on tonight cause Mondays are brutal on TV. Oh sure, it’s just preseason, but for an expert football analyst such as myself, that’s no problem at all. Not that I need to analyze the players anymore since I’ve given up playing fantasy football. FF is just too much of a hassle and takes away from the enjoyment of the game.

Speaking of football, some Yay-HOO over at the AP has picked Arkansas to go to the BCS Championship Game and play Southern California there. So, how to Arkansas fans on the message boards react to this? Do they celebrate having a team that at least one “expert” is picking to go to the big game? Do they celebrate having a team ranked in the Top 10 to start the season? No, they bitch that the guy picked USC to win the championship game. They’re delusional. Every last one of them.

I could talk about Todd Akin, but why bother? By the end of the week he will have restored his lead in the polls and be on his way to making Missouri the laughingstock of the country. But, I will say to all you folks out there saying you want your politicians to “just be honest” I hope you’re happy. This is what we get when politicians are honest. People like Akin say things like women can’t get pregnant from “legitimate rape” because that is what he honestly believes. I guarantee you the GOP would like for Akin to quit being honest about what so many of them believe too.

Let’s see what else is happening. Jack shit, that’s what. So bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. I don’t really have anything to rant about. The newspaper is being delivered regularly again. Well, as regularly as it gets printed. The local paper doesn’t run on Sundays or Mondays. But, even though it doesn’t run every day anymore, they still have the audacity to call that paper the “Harrison DAILY Times.” What’s up with that? Shouldn’t it be the “Harrison NOT DAILY Times?” Or the “Harrison Most Days Times?” I maybe have to bring this up with them.

Nothing happening with the noisy neighbors either. The guy upstairs has been doing his partying somewhere else lately. Of course, I might be jinxing that by writing this. I’ll be pissed off if this post goes up at midnight and an hour later a bunch of people show up at his apartment and they crank up that God-awful music. Maybe I should delete it? But, there’s nothing else going on! I guess I’ll just roll the dice and leave it in. Living on the edge is a pretty wild experience.

Well, I guess I’ll wrap this steaming pile of excrement up since it’s doubtful anyone is still reading. I would be. Hell, I’m not reading while I’m typing. My fingers are just doing whatever the hell they want. My brain has stopped and my fingers are doing all the thinking and typing. Hell, I could do this all week. Don’t you think we’ve seen enough of Zach Galifianikis lately? I do. He needs to take some time off. Like the rest of the year or something. That fudgesicle I had for dessert was exceptionally good tonight. I wonder why Word says fudgesicle isn’t a real word? That’s some bullshit right there. Nobody who works for Microsoft has ever known the simple pleasure of sucking on a long, luscious fudgesicle? What a bunch of fucking losers. Whoa! All of the sudden, I’m up to 630 words in this post. Now I KNOW it’s time to wrap it up cause nobody likes a long wordy blog post, especially one as boring as this one. So anyway, that’s all I’ve got.

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS 

9 comments:

I'm With Stupid said...

I have a loose tooth. So loose it seems like it should just fall out, but no...It has some robust anger within itself and wants to remain attached much to my annoyance. Is that exciting or boring? Cheers Jayman!!

Matt-Man

I'm With Stupid said...

Matt-Man: That is VERY exciting.

Jay

Mike said...

“Harrison DAILY Times”

Maybe they should change their name to the “Harrison SOME Times”.

Jo said...

You just wrote the post I was going to write. I was even going to use "dog days" although I don't really know why that means what it does.

Todd Akin--the hell?! I know this kind of stupid has been living and breeding in America since the beginning, but nothing really prepares me for the reality of hearing it speak. He seems to think my uterus has a death ray inside it, or the Holy Spirit.

Gnetch said...

You're not reading while you're typing? That's awesome talent right there. Haha!

Anyway, that's a pretty good picture of Lindsay Lohan. Compared to what she really looks like lately.

I'm With Stupid said...

Mike: Or "Harrison Daily Except Not Really Times."

Jay

I'm With Stupid said...

Jo: I'm sure you will write it a lot gooder than I did.

I like the idea of Uterus Death Rays.

Jay

I'm With Stupid said...

Gnetch: I'm a guy with lots of really amazing talents. Or something.

Jay

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