Matt Said, Jay Said...7576227382

Matt:  Yeah, what do you want?
Jay:  Everything.
Matt:  Well, you won’t find it here.
Jay:  But I am searching for it all.
Matt:  Beat it Mister.

Jay:  Hey now…How you doin’?
Matt:  M’eh…kinda bored.  And you?
Jay:  Just bailing out my personal canoe from all of the rain down here.
Matt:  I saw that.  What a fucking shame.
Jay:  That didn’t sound sincere.
Matt:  It was…I’m just…m’eh.

Jay:  Yeah, I understand.  There’s just nothing going on right now.
Matt:  I know.  Fake football…No big holiday until Labor Day, Congress is in recess.
Jay:  Yeah.  And the middle school girls aren’t back in school yet, and the TV re-runs…Oh Dear God!!
Matt:  So damn boring.

Jay:  This week sucks.  Of course Sunday, the 18th is National Bad Poetry Day.  We can go HAM on that.
Matt:  Oh Hell yeah, and the week after that on the 25th will be our End of Season Three Extravaganza.
Jay: And September 1st will be our Opening of Season Four Extravaganza!!
Matt:  And yet?  We have nothing for this week.
Jay:  I know…man, it’s hard sometimes.

Matt:  That’s why they call this time of year, the Dog Days of Summer.
Jay:  That’s It!!
Matt:  What!?  What’s it!?
Jay:  This week’s show will be called, The Dog Days of Summer!!
Matt:  You are fucking brilliant!!
Jay:  I know, right!?

Matt:  But as we just said…nothing happens during the Dog Days of Summer.
Jay:  Exactly, and that is what we’ll talk about!!
Matt:  We’ll talk about nothing?
Jay:  Yes!!
Matt:  Brilliant!!
Jay:  I think we’ve just one-upped Seinfeld.
Matt:  Damn right…Kramer can suck your dick.
Jay:  I’d prefer if Elaine did it.
Matt:  Brilliant!!

Jay:  Alright then…you, me, Bobby Kraft, Paul Piatt, Bob Barker, and whoever else on our staff wants to chime in, will be there.
Matt:  Along with all of the listeners and callers to our Number One Rated Comedy Show.
Jay:  Damn right.  Even though there is nothing there, we’ll make it something.
Matt:  Word.

Jay:  We are going to build the biggest pile of nothing that has ever been built, this Sunday at Noon ET.
Matt:  And President Obama better not say that we didn’t build it.
Jay:  Damn right.  Talk to you this Sunday from Noon-2 PM ET Matt-Man.
Matt:  Ditto Jayman!!

To catch Jay, Matt, and the Dog Days of Summer IWS Radio Show LIVE this Sunday from Noon-2 PM ET, you can click right HERE.

The Mind Wanders

Hola Y’all! Yeah okay, so I’m supposed to be blogging and instead I’m rolling through #RejectedYankeeCandles on Twitter faster than Taylor Swift goes through boyfriends. Seriously, at the pace she’s going she HAS to get down to me eventually, right? In fact, I’m guessing it happens in 2013. Late in the year, but it happens. It will be a glorious two weeks. Okay, 10 days.

Man it sure has turned cold here in God’s Country. I couldn’t get warm tonight so decided to put on a pair of socks. They helped but one of them had a hole in them so they weren’t as effective as they could have been. Anyway, we were originally told we would get up to 10 inches of snow. Instead we got less than two inches and it was gone by noon. What a huge disappointment. Just like me.

So how was everyone’s Christmas? That’s great. I had a pretty good Christmas but I’m glad it’s over. I like Christmas but by the time I watch “A Christmas Story” then open presents, then make Christmas dinner and basically eat until I hate myself, I’m ready for it to all be over. I would have taken down the tree today but I was too lazy.

Between college football bowl games, the NFL over the weekend and all those NBA games on Xmas Day, I watched a butt-load of sports the last few days. This caused me to post this over on the Tumblr Blog (with apologies to George Carlin) …

“I’m a scrappy, five-tool impact player who can take over a game and score from anywhere. I’m a tough, hard-nosed, old-school winner who can flat out play. I’m the consummate team player who can come off the bench and provide a spark by bringing a lot of energy to the game and get stronger as the game goes on. I’ve silenced my critics by being a great chemistry guy in the locker room and a go-to guy in the clutch who knows what it takes to win and if I’m even I’m leavin’.”

You know, I might just give up watching sports in 2013. I’ll have to wait until after the BCS Championship game of course. And, there’s the Super Bowl, don’t wanna miss that. I’ll still watch the NBA too but that’s probably it. Maybe I’ll watch Arkansas in the NCAA men’s basketball tournament if they make it. And the Four if Duke isn’t playing in it. Of course, I’ll want to watch the Master’s golf tournament and the US Open and British Open, but that’s all the golf I’ll watch. So yeah, that’s pretty much giving up sports. Well, until college football season rolls around again next fall.

Oops! Well, the old Midnight Easter Standard Time deadline just passed. I think this is the first deadline I’ve missed since we started this blog. Not that anyone will notice because I’ll just manually set the time so everything will look normal. And Matt-Man is old so he’s already asleep and won’t see this until tomorrow. So that’s cool.

Well, it’s time to find a hot picture of Taylor Swift and get this all uploaded so I can go to bed and not sleep. That way I will be tired and cranky when I go to Walmart tomorrow. That’s the best attitude to have when going there.

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS

In other news we had yet another fun and charming episode of I’m With Stupid yesterday. We gave a Christmas recap, talked about Boxing Day, Kwanzaa and how much Cincinnati sucks (Hint: It sucks A LOT.) and all kinds of other stuff. So, check it out right here …

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