Jayman is Fascinating

Hola Y’all! While I’m off enjoying Super Happy Margarita Night here in the Jewel of the Midwest, here’s another fun meme to keep you entertained.

1. Have you ever been searched by the cops?
Not a real cop.

2. Do you close your eyes on roller coasters?
I don’t ride roller coasters.


3. When's the last time you've been sledding?
Years and years and years ago.


4. Would you rather sleep with someone else, or alone?
Well, you know that I *AM* the world’s greatest cuddler.


5. Do you believe in ghosts?
Definitely.  I’ve seen lots of ‘em.

6. Do you consider yourself creative?
Sometimes, I guess.

7. Do you think O.J. killed his wife?
I have no doubt whatsoever.

8. Jennifer Aniston or Angelina Jolie?
Team Aniston

9. Do you stay friends with your exes?
Kinda

10. Do you know how to play poker?
I know the basic rules and idea behind Texas Hold-Em, but I’m not very good at it.

11. Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight?
Cocaine is a hellova drug.

12. What's your favorite commercial?
It’s an old one but “I LIKE TACOS!”

13. What are you allergic to?
Mangos and success.

14. If you're driving in the middle of the night, and no one is around do you run red lights?
No, ‘cause you know there is a cop pretty close and he'll nail me.

15. Do you have a secret that no one knows but you?
More than one.

16. Boston Red Sox or New York Yankees?
Niether. OH GOD I HATE THEM BOTH AND THEIR FAN BASES SO MUCH!

17. Have you ever been Ice Skating?
Yes, a long, loooooooooooooooooooooooong time ago.

18. How often do you remember your dreams?
About half the time.

19. When was the last time you laughed so hard you cried?
During our Lesbian Celebration show.

20. Can you name 5 songs by The Beatles?
Hey Jude
Revolution
I Wanna Hold Your Hand
Dear Prudence
Get Back

21. What's the one thing on your mind now?
Holy crap those margaritas are good!

22. Do you know who Ghetto-ass barbie is?
No, but I've known a few Barbies who lived in the Ghetto

23. Do you always wear your seat belt?
Yes, always.

24. What cell service do you use?
Net 10 cause I’m fancy like that.

25. Do you like Sushi?
No, cause my sister tried to use it to kill me once.

26. Have you ever narrowly avoided a fatal accident?
Yes

27. What do you wear to bed?
Nothing. Sexy, right?

28. Been caught stealing?
Caught? No.

29. What shoe size do you have?
12.5 or 13.

30. Do you truly hate anyone?
Yes, but I'm trying to get past that. It’s bad to hate.

31. Classic Rock or Rap?
I love and hate both of them.

32. If you could sleep with one famous person, who would it be?
Sofia Vergara

Or, Zhang Ziyi

33. Favorite Song?
There’s no way to come up with ONE favorite song.

34. Have you ever sung in front of the mirror?
Haven’t we all?

35. What food do you find disgusting?
Mayonnaise

36. Do you sing in the shower?
Not usually.

37. Did you ever play, "I'll show you mine, if you show me yours"?
Many times, in fact I’d be willing to play with many of you right now.

38. Have you ever made fun of your friends behind their back?
No more than you have.

39. Have you ever stood up for someone you hardly knew?
Yes.

40. Have you ever been punched in the face?
Yes.


Woo-Hoo! Another fascinating trip to Jaymanville!

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS 


Be sure to check out the I’m With Stupid podcast! The #1 Comedy Show on Blog Talk Radio!

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Bad Fortune Cookie Messages

Hola y’all! Do you love Chinese food? Of course you do. Everyone does! Well, except me. I know that you’re surprised by that what with my love of Asian babes and all. I’m just weird that way, I guess. Anyway, I do love Fortune Cookies though, even if they are kind of hokey. So, here are some messages you aren’t likely to get in your Fortune Cookies next time you hit the Chinese Buffett.

“Do you really believe this shit?”

“Bet you wish you had done Mexican instead, huh?”

“All previous fortunes are now invalid. Sorry about that.”

“You’re probably gonna die alone.”

“It’s okay to act out your homoerotic dreams.”

“There’s someone hiding in your bedroom closet.”

“Your partner will bring you a surprise that you can treat with antibiotics.”

“Don’t watch that new show ‘Nashville’ on ABC. It’s gonna suck.”

“Those weren’t raisins.”

“The cook with the long hair and dozens of tats and piercings? Yeah, he has TB.”

“That guy you think is your brother is really your father.”

“You will live downstairs from a sexual deviant with bad taste in music.”

“Creepy guys will sniff you in the elevator.”

“You have 20 minutes to get home before the cramps start.”

“I bet you were going to put a pic of this on Instagram, weren’t you?”

“Listen to I’m With Stupid every Wed at 11 am ET and Sun at 12 Noon ET: www.blogtalkradio.com/im-with-stupid.”

“You should probably take it easy on the Crab Rangoon big boy.”

“Your mother never really loved you.”

“99% of your Facebook ‘friends’ hate you.”


Okay, there you go. That’s way better than all the silly “You will meet a mysterious stranger” stuff you usually get!

Jayman
Jayman3768@gmail.com
@Jayman_IWS

In other news we welcomed the lovely and hilarious Missy to IWS today and she did NOT disappoint! She told us about all the weird and wacky things that have happened to her over the years. So definitely check this show out!

Listen to internet radio with Im With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio

Celebrating Skinny Girls!

Hola Bitches! You know, one of the things that piss me off most in Social Media is how disingenuous people are. People are always pretending to be something they’re not. Like all these guys who are always writing blog posts talking about how much they love “thick” or “curvy” or “voluptuous” women. I say bullshit.

They’re just doing those posts to get women to like them. They know that when they do that, women will flock to them and shower them with praise. Cause women are easy to manipulate like that. But, they don’t mean it. Usually, their version of “curvy” just means some chick with a huge rack, but otherwise pretty skinny. Or a skinny chick with big fake boobs.

God I hate fake boobs. Your boobs are perfect the way they are ladies.

Anyway, the reason this bugs most is because it’s open season on skinny chicks on the internet. You can pretty much say anything you want, no matter how mean or hateful, about skinny chicks and everyone will laugh and pat you on the back for it. But, if you dare call Kim Kardashian “Thunder Thighs” you will be clobbered for your “insensitivity.”

Never mind the fact that skinny girls are way hotter. That doesn’t matter. It’s all about being politically correct. And of course, the leaders of all this hatred towards skinny girls are other women. Man, there is so much woman-on-woman crime happening on the internet! It’s just embarrassing.

And GOD FORBID someone post the pic of a really beautiful Asian lady with a perfect body like Zhang Ziyi! That’s when the claws really come out. “OMG! She’s just gross!” “She has the body of a 12 year old boy!” “She has sharp knees!” “She needs to eat a sandwich!” And so on. Jealousy and racism is an ugly combination.  

See, nobody ever takes skinny girls’ feelings into account. I see all of these “All women are beautiful” posts and comments all the time. But, 90% of those are aimed at making “curvy” women feel better about not being skinny. Whenever I see “I love curvy women” blog posts or pics on Tumblr or whatever, I NEVER see anyone defend the healthy skinny girls. And, that makes me sad. Just because they take care of themselves, doesn’t mean it’s okay to be hateful towards them.

So here’s to the Skinny Girls! The one’s with the small boobs, long legs and round, firm asses! These are girls who aren’t embarrassed to be skinny. They’re proud of their healthy lifestyles. They wear clothes that show off their flat bellies. They proudly go out in public in tight jeans or short shorts. They stand up to the cruel and hateful attacks from society and especially other women.

They say “Here I am world! I’m skinny and proud! And I love myself!”

Jayman
jayman3768@gmail.com
www.twitter.com/jayman_iws

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In other news, Saturday’s show on I’m With Stupid started out with the intention of having a Self-Pity Party. But, circumstances changed and it ended up being most a rather awkward, yet endearing birthday celebration for The Creepy Kid Next Door.

CKND called in, and as a surprise, Matt-Man had arranged to have a beautiful young lady with the voice of an angel also call in so she could sing “Happy Birthday.” It was a very special moment. Even if she is probably STILL shaking her head trying to figure just who the hell we are what that show was all about.

Then her mom called as did Mike AKA: “Mr. Excitement” and we shot the breeze for the rest of the show. So, instead of being depressing, the show will actually put a smile on your face. And when it comes down to it, that’s all we really want to do. Thanks for listening!

Listen to internet radio with Im With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio