Matt Said, Jay Said 4 (Non Blondes)

Matt impersonates Dick Morris.  Jay impersonates Dick Morris.  You feel the need to take a shower.

Matt:  Yo Yo and speak to me.
Jay:  Hi…This is Dick Morris is the lady of the house available, and if she is, what is she wearing?
Matt:  Well Hi…Dick Morris here too, and my 400 dollar an hour Asian girlfriend is here wearing nothing but a silk kimodo.
Jay:  Hee Hee…Don’t you mean that she is wearing a kimono?
Matt:  Oops…guess I was wrong yet again.  I seem to have a knack for that.

Jay:  So?  What up?
Matt:  M’eh.  Nothing much and you?
Jay:  Had chicken and made some Stove Top stuffing this evening.
Matt:  Sweet.  I looove stuffing.  You used broth instead of water in the stuffing didn’t you?
Jay:  Oh Hell yeah.  Using broth instead of water in Stove Top stuffing puts that exclamation point on it.
Matt:  IKR?  Broth brings out the spi--
Jay:  Should we…two manly men…be discussing the proper way to prepare Stove Top stuffing?
Matt:  Well…A good stuffing is important
Jay:  See?  That’s what I mean?  What you just said, sounds like the title of a Thanksgiving Day themed gay porn flick.
Matt:  Ai yi yi…you’re right.

(After an awkward thirty seconds of silence as Jay tweets a hot babe, and Matt tells Schmoop how sexy she is and how much he likes women…)

Jay:  So?  Sunday’s show?
Matt:  Um…I was thinking…We may be sarcastic bastards ’n’ shit but we are pretty nice guys.
Jay:  Yes we are.  Always there for others.  Emotionally philanthropic if you will.
Matt:  Yep.  Always a kind word for others.
Jay:  Sometimes we are too sweet for our own good.
Matt:  Exactly…We could do a show about how damn sweet and nice we are.
Jay:  Sounds Great!!

(After more pen clicking and Matt peeing in the sink…)

Matt and Jay:  Eh, I’m not feeling that.

Matt:  I had some chick follow me on Twitter today.  Said that she is a fan of IWS and she’s a lesbian.
Jay:  Man…We have several lesbians who read our site and listen to our show.  What’s up with that?
Matt:  I haven’t a clue, but I have noticed that too.
Jay:  Maybe they find us endearing as they know that as lesbians, we won’t hit on them.
Matt:  Exactly…

Matt and Jay:  Ha Ha Ha Ha, like that matters!!
Jay:  IKR?
Matt:  Lesbian or not?
Jay:  Who’s gonna be hitting on a hot, gay chick?
Matt and Jay:  THESE guys!!

Matt:  Alright, I guess we are set.
Jay:  Yep.  We’ll talk hot lesbians.
Matt:  Freaky lesbians.
Jay:  How that all works.
Matt:  Gotta know whose role is whose.

Jay:  Maybe some lesbians will call in and give you and I tips on how we can make a gay marriage work?
Matt:  We are soooo ready.
Jay:  Toodles!!
Matt:  Buh bye.

You can catch all the HOT LIVE Lesbian action this Sunday at Noon ET on IWS Radio.  To listen LIVE and/or call-in, click HERE!!

What Is SEO? It's Gold...Gold!!

Cheers, Hola, and American Greetings to you all…

As you know, well some of you do, Jayman and I do a Saturday show (which will continue to air live at 6:30 PM EDT), and we also did an unprepped news-related Monday show at 11 AM EDT.

Between those two shows we would have a Wednesday phone call and decide on our topic for Saturday’s show complete with preparation and everything!!

We decided to let you in on our show prep phone calls and that is what we will begin today, Wednesday September 14th, at 11 AM EDT on I’m With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio.

You can hear us prepping live for Saturday’s show, AND…

You’ll be surprised at the meticulous fashion with which we go about putting together a quality program at a fair price for you guys.

Aside from the brilliant banter, lively talk, and uproarious recorded bits we put out for each show, there is some science to it as well. It’s called SEO, or for you neophytes, Search Engine Optimization.

After all, you want people to know your show and website exist so they can find you when doing a Google Search.

So Jayman and I try to include labels on our show titles and words in our website posts that draw people in and draw hits from Google. But I digress, or do I? Here’s a typical show prep convo…

Jayman talks about how he really likes eating Delicious Vienna Sausages. I tell him that they are gross and he responds by saying that my entire rolodex of Delicious SPAM Recipes curdle his stomach.

And then, as we both have ESPN on, we notice how HOT and SEXY a NAKED Maria Sharapova is, and our thoughts turn to Hot Russian Brides.

Then we describe how we would get a hot Russian chick drunk. Jay would use Silver Patron Tequila, and I of course would use, Wild Irish Rose distributed by the Centerra Wine Company.

Of course we talk about other hot babes such as Tamron Hall Naked, and Mila Kunis Naked, and sometimes, as we are very close, we speak of the Sex Scenes between Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal.

After that, we are ready and we get to the work at hand and talk about the upcoming show like when we discussed the 2011 NFL Football Schedule, ESPN Fantasy Football, and/or Hot Gay and Lesbian Sex!!

After feeling each other up, we decide on a topic and say to each other, "Good work....another intense prep session complete."

So there you go…a little reminder about the schedule change and format of our show and a lesson in SEO.

It’s not like it’s rocket science. Unless of course, you work for the NASA Mission to Mars!!

Cheers, and join us today at 11 AM EDT on I’m With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio,

Matt-Man

neshobadude@yahoo.com

www.twitter.com/#!/MattManIWS