Jay: Y’know? You’re always trying to be “edgy” when you answer the phone even though you know it’s me.
Matt: I can’t help it.
Jay: Well stop it. Just answer the phone like a normal person.
Matt: I’m sorry…Should we start over?
Jay: Yes…Hang up and I’ll call back.
Matt: Otay.
Matt: Hello? You've reached Bi-Sexual Records, Clive Davis speaking…
Jay: See? That was much better, and didn't it feel good?
Matt: Eh, it felt okay. I could go either way on that.
Jay: Ha Haaaaaaaaa, aren't you clever?
Matt: Not really.
Jay: You are correct, but that was a rhetorical question.
Matt: I know; I get your freaky mind games, Mister Man.
Jay: I’m a playa.
Matt: Anyhoo…Oh hell Jayman, Angry Mailman is here, and he may have some good tidings for us.
Jay: Well, quit peeing yourself and go check.
Matt: Jayman…It came!! It came!!
Jay: Oh c’mon dude; I don’t need to know that, especially if it came while talking to me.
Matt: No you dumbass, not my cock, OUR IWS check!!
Jay: Ohhhhhhhhh Helllll Yeahhhhhh….I think I just came.
Matt: Sounded like it…Can you believe this? We got the check. We’re going to go Premium on BTR!!
Jay: We’ll have like unlimited time and unlimited file uploads now. We’re gonna fuck with some people.
Matt: Oh c’mon…This is not a license to thoroughly make fun of people who are jerks…….
Matt and Jay: HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa…The Hell it isn't!!
Jay: We’ll start with Logan Knight. She made fun of our incredibly sweet and hot IWS gal pal Tamra last night.
Matt: Oh hell yes…That Logan chick is a dead cunt walking.
Jay: You said, “cunt” that may be a bit much. I mean, she is, but…
Matt: Okay…well…no…yeah, she’s a cunt.
Jay: I agree, but well…should we use that word to describe another human being?
Matt: Logan Knight made fun of sweet Tamra…Logan is NOT a human being.
Jay: Word.
Matt: Man…we throw out the cunt word today as we did last Wednesday; should we reflect on what we say?
Jay: You mean as far as what we say on the air and write on the blog?
Matt: Yeah…Do we sometimes cross this nebulous and ever-moving line of what is okay and what is not?
Jay: What the fuck ever? Why the fuck not? Let’s talk the fuck about being offensive on Saturday.
Matt: I think I’m with you.
Jay: You better be the fuck with me, you cunt.
Matt: Jay….Jay…Jay stop it.
Jay: I’m sorry…I am a method acting international internet radio star, and I was getting into character.
Matt: Quite understandable.
Jay: Sorry.
Matt: I think we are ready, annnnnnnd we can rip McMImports for not sponsoring us.
Jay: Y’know…I was just calming down and you brought those Bulgarian Bastards up.
Matt: Easy…We can talk about them tonight.
Jay: Alright….Alright…I’m alright.
Matt: Bye Jayman.
Jay: What the fuck ever.
And catch us tonight on BTR as we discuss does comedy ever cross the line and the new horizons that IWS will be taking. You can catch it all tonight LIVE at 11 PM ET TONIGHT right HERE!!
7 comments:
We are now officially Professionals. I mean, not the kind of professional Logan Knight is because we don't work while on our knees.
Jay
Jay: Oh Logan is a professional alright...A Professional CUNT!! Cheers Jayman!!
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Oh I'm so happy you're Pro now! This means more time, right?
Not too long ago I would cringe every time that c-word came up, but now, there's so much cuntlyness going around--it's like cuntmageddon!--I'm less shocked by the word than the reality.
Jo: Embrace the Culture of Cunt Jo, and yes...Once we are all set, one two hour show a week. Cheers Jo!!
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