Saturday, January 11, 2014


Matt: Cheers ‘n shit.
Jay: Holawhatever.
Matt: Dude you need to cheer up.
Jay: I DO??? Sheesh.
Matt: Things have just been …. Blah lately.
Jay: A little Seasonal Affective Disorder
Matt: I guess.
Jay: But, things are looking up!
Matt: True. Schmoop got her unemployment!
Jay: And the ice and snow is about to melt away!
Matt: True. There are positive things happening.
Jay: And Britney Spears won a People’s Choice Award!
Matt: I’m so glad she’s back.
Jay: America is a better place when Britney is around.
Matt: Word.

Matt: So what was for supper?
Jay: You mean dinner?
Matt: What’s that?
Jay: That’s what you have as your evening meal?
Matt: Huh. Okay what was for supper?
Jay: Is that the evening meal?
Matt: It’s gonna be you LAST supper if you keep doing this!
Jay: Damn you’re touchy.
Jay: Goodness! I had red beans and rice.
Matt: Oh, that’s not too bad at all.
Jay: IKR?! Whatchu havin’?
Matt: Chicken patties. Schmoop already made them.
Jay: Damn, that Schmoop is pretty thoughtful.
Matt: She’ll surprise you sometimes.
Matt: Scrappy!
Jay: That’s how white women are.
Matt: True dat.
Jay: It doesn’t come naturally to them either.
Matt: God no! They have to work at it.

Jay: HEY! I know what always cheers you up.
Matt: What’s that?
Jay: Doing “hit pieces” on people.
Matt: Oooooo … that is always a good pick-me-up!
Jay: So let’s do it!
Matt: Who? Where? When?
Jay: On the show! Let’s take down all the a-holes!
Matt: I like it!
Jay: Just think of who you can’t stand.
Matt: Hmm … Sean Hannity, Al Sharpton, Rachel Maddow.
Jay: There you go. Take ‘em down this week.
Matt: We can do it! Who’s in your crosshairs?
Jay: Maybe Chris Hayes. Skip Bayless. A few others.
Matt: Jerks!
Jay: IKR? Also, maybe other pet-peeves.
Matt: Like?
Jay: Kids, old people, theme parties. Stupid shit.
Matt: There’s sooooo much stupid shit going on.
Jay: We can do this!
Matt: We MUST do this!
Jay: Oh one other person who needs the IWS treatment badly.
Matt and Jay: CHRIS CHRISTIE!!!!
Matt: Set phasers to destroy!
Jay: Let’s get to battle stations!

Be sure to tune into “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” on IWS Radio Sunday night at 8 PM ET!!! 

1 comment:

I'm With Stupid said...

There are so many people that are going to be splattered on this show, we could have called it The St. Valentine's Day Massacre Show, but we'd be ahead of ourselves. Cheers Jay!!