Y’know..?
Even in my advanced, un-hip, soon to be forty seven years here on Earth, I have become much more “au courant” as to what’s going on around me and my universe.
And…
I want to give thanks to all the various groups, people, and special interests for sponsoring National Days and Months of Awareness for keeping me current and for squeezing the air from the bellows of the internets to the dying embers of my aging synapses.
Until I discovered the magic of the internets some years ago, I never realized how many things of which I was unaware. For instance…
Did you know that that last Friday, January 13th, was National Amber Alert Awareness Day? Oh yeah.
Up until last Friday, when I saw an Amber Alert come on TV or sound across my radio, I thought it was but a mere commercial for milk producers rationalizing their need to put pictures of cute kids on their milk cartons in order to sell more teat squeezing goodness from Elsie.
And dig this…I found out days earlier on January 11th, that it was Human Trafficking Awareness Day. When I read that for the 1,658th time on Facebook last Wednesday, I had an epiphany and finally asked myself…
“Is that Mexican dude down the hall from us, really taking the ten year old Vietnamese girl dressed in a bespangled boa and short skirt to tryouts for a pre-pubescent version of the musical, Guys and Dolls like he says he is?”
Evidently the dude did take her to a tryout for Guys and Dolls, because when I woke up after following them to the tryouts at Mel’s Taquiera, I woke up with a black eye, broken septum, and a note pinned to my chest that said, “Kim is playing the part of Miss Adelaide. Don’t come back again.”
I appreciate the efforts of you Awareness Day developers.
I wouldn’t have known anything about breast cancer unless baseball players wore pink sweat bands and swung pink bats in October.
I’m really asscited about February 7th this year. Not only is it my birthday, it’s also National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day. I never even knew that black folks got AIDS. I always thought they were merely relegated to the plight of developing sickle cell anemia from smoking too much crack.
I always thought of black people, especially black guys, as nothing but straight young bucks…but now?
I am always going to think of the tough guy movie, Shaft, as an allegory of a gay black man battling a suppressed homosexual love for bruthas, and think of bad ass Richard Roundtree as nothing but an ebony skinned, baritone version of, Freddie Mercury.
On a personal note…I remember last year when school started; I was going to talk about how my kid carries like forty pounds of useless crap in his backpack every day as he goes to school. He was always hunched over in Quasimodo form and I thought I could write about.
Nope…Someone, or should I say, some group had long beaten me to discussing that issue.
Did you know that the American Occupational Therapy Association (AOTA) has deemed the third Wednesday of September each year to be, National School Backpack Awareness Day™?
In fact, when I first found that out this past year, I alerted our son’s mother, and we weighed him down with four bricks in addition to his regular load so he would be aware of it too. Awareness is good!!
And let me tell you, every October 23rd, I have an overwhelming feeling to smother myself in peanut butter and red meat and allow my neighbor’s dog to celebrate his canis lupis molosser beauty and powerful jaws on National Pit Bull Awareness Day.
Seriously people…What the Hell are you doing? Most people are aware of pit bulls, overstuffed backpacks, cancer and, young chicks being used in the flesh trade.
I know you and your organization feel good about yourselves when you send out press releases announcing these days of awareness, but c’mon…it’s all about jacking up contributions to the bottom lines of your organizations.
And let me tell you…if that’s the case…
I am announcing that this coming February is, Matt-Man Needs a New Digital Camera Awareness Month. So c’mon…Pass Matt-Man some cabbage, feel good knowing that you are doing the right thing, and more importantly…
Realize that you are aware.
Cheers!!
E-Mail: neshobadude@yahoo.com
Twitter: @mattmaniws
Even in my advanced, un-hip, soon to be forty seven years here on Earth, I have become much more “au courant” as to what’s going on around me and my universe.And…
I want to give thanks to all the various groups, people, and special interests for sponsoring National Days and Months of Awareness for keeping me current and for squeezing the air from the bellows of the internets to the dying embers of my aging synapses.
Until I discovered the magic of the internets some years ago, I never realized how many things of which I was unaware. For instance…
Did you know that that last Friday, January 13th, was National Amber Alert Awareness Day? Oh yeah.
Up until last Friday, when I saw an Amber Alert come on TV or sound across my radio, I thought it was but a mere commercial for milk producers rationalizing their need to put pictures of cute kids on their milk cartons in order to sell more teat squeezing goodness from Elsie.
And dig this…I found out days earlier on January 11th, that it was Human Trafficking Awareness Day. When I read that for the 1,658th time on Facebook last Wednesday, I had an epiphany and finally asked myself…
“Is that Mexican dude down the hall from us, really taking the ten year old Vietnamese girl dressed in a bespangled boa and short skirt to tryouts for a pre-pubescent version of the musical, Guys and Dolls like he says he is?”
Evidently the dude did take her to a tryout for Guys and Dolls, because when I woke up after following them to the tryouts at Mel’s Taquiera, I woke up with a black eye, broken septum, and a note pinned to my chest that said, “Kim is playing the part of Miss Adelaide. Don’t come back again.”
I appreciate the efforts of you Awareness Day developers.
I wouldn’t have known anything about breast cancer unless baseball players wore pink sweat bands and swung pink bats in October.
I’m really asscited about February 7th this year. Not only is it my birthday, it’s also National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day. I never even knew that black folks got AIDS. I always thought they were merely relegated to the plight of developing sickle cell anemia from smoking too much crack.
I always thought of black people, especially black guys, as nothing but straight young bucks…but now?I am always going to think of the tough guy movie, Shaft, as an allegory of a gay black man battling a suppressed homosexual love for bruthas, and think of bad ass Richard Roundtree as nothing but an ebony skinned, baritone version of, Freddie Mercury.
On a personal note…I remember last year when school started; I was going to talk about how my kid carries like forty pounds of useless crap in his backpack every day as he goes to school. He was always hunched over in Quasimodo form and I thought I could write about.
Nope…Someone, or should I say, some group had long beaten me to discussing that issue.
Did you know that the American Occupational Therapy Association (AOTA) has deemed the third Wednesday of September each year to be, National School Backpack Awareness Day™?
In fact, when I first found that out this past year, I alerted our son’s mother, and we weighed him down with four bricks in addition to his regular load so he would be aware of it too. Awareness is good!!
And let me tell you, every October 23rd, I have an overwhelming feeling to smother myself in peanut butter and red meat and allow my neighbor’s dog to celebrate his canis lupis molosser beauty and powerful jaws on National Pit Bull Awareness Day.
Seriously people…What the Hell are you doing? Most people are aware of pit bulls, overstuffed backpacks, cancer and, young chicks being used in the flesh trade.I know you and your organization feel good about yourselves when you send out press releases announcing these days of awareness, but c’mon…it’s all about jacking up contributions to the bottom lines of your organizations.
And let me tell you…if that’s the case…
I am announcing that this coming February is, Matt-Man Needs a New Digital Camera Awareness Month. So c’mon…Pass Matt-Man some cabbage, feel good knowing that you are doing the right thing, and more importantly…
Realize that you are aware.
Cheers!!
E-Mail: neshobadude@yahoo.com
Twitter: @mattmaniws
3 comments:
Beth: Rude, hateful, and full of venom is no way to go through life. Cheers Schmoop!!
Matt-Man
Every Saturday night is I'm With Stupid awareness day worldwide!
Jay
Jayman: Well you got me there. Listening to I'm With Stupid on Saturdays is something that people MUST be made aware of for the sake of humanity. Cheers Jayman!!
Matt-Man
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