Thursday, November 17, 2011

PolitiChicks TV: Making FOX News and The View Look Like Excellence in Journalism

As a person who prides himself on being able to observe the day to day good with the bad, the stupid with the less than bright, the barely functional with the not-so-much so, and still smile about life, I have to tell ya…

I have recently seen something on the internet (thanks to Jayman) that turns this slightly left of center, middle aged, Midwest American man into a Texas-sized puddle of Dr. Phil-type stupefied glue. It’s called…

PolitiChicks.tv

I watched the debut episode on their website Wednesday night, and let me tell you…

The I’m With Stupid internet radio show that Jayman and I do twice a week, has better production values, and exponentially greater socio/politico insight than the new, “big time” web show called:

PolitiChicks.

And get this…Their show is hosted by allegedly “famous” people. Four “quasi-famous women” who bleed Conservatism and need an outlet, because as they state on their website:

“As we all know, Conservatives have few outlets in the media. Other than Fox News and a few talk radio shows, Conservatives are greatly outnumbered.”

First of all, FOX News as far as cable outlets go, has an uber-sized audience, and maybe I’m crazy, but as far as Conservative talk radio goes, I think the Clear Channel Empire and others, dominate the airwaves with Limbaugh, Hannity, Boortz, and the like.

So…Who are these four babes of Conservatism and what are they saying? First question first…

The hosts…

Jennie Jones: Jen loves America and her freedoms, and is the editor of something called Patriot Update which is tied to the PolitiChick debacle, and focuses on anti-human trafficking issues.

The Jenster is pursuing a Master’s Degree in History. Perhaps once she gets her degree in History, and in spite of her blind ideology of, America: Love Her or Leave Her, will go back in time and sue our forefathers for participating in the aforementioned Human Trafficking issue.

Next, we have…

Ann-Marie Murrel: Ann is the “sexy” one of the bunch, but don’t let the picture fool you. In the video, the bags beneath Ann’s eyes droop lower than Rodney Dangerfield’s self-esteem. However, what she lacks in gerrymandered looks, she makes up for in logic and sensitivity, as she states in the first episode:

“Not all Muslims are terrorists, but all terrorists are Muslim.”

I hate to contradict a never-will-be hottie like Ann-Marie, but I think some people who endured the Nazi regime, a few folks in Oklahoma City, and more than a slew of ten year old boys who showered at Penn State, would disagree with the less than sexy H-Annie-Ty.

Now…It’s time for a woman “of color” to balance things out and give this internet rag mag credence…

Jannique Stewart: Jannique, or as I’m sure Conservatives call her, “That cutsey, non-threatening looking black woman.”, is all about purity and abstinence, which I find odd because she, “quickly rose up the corporate ladder” of a pharmaceutical company, so I know she was damn well pushing birth control pills!!

Anyhoo…

She’s all minority lookin’, Conservative, and black Bristol Palin-like and what not now, so she’s a good fit. She gives the show an “edgy, yet keeping within the framework of Christianity” feel.

Lastly, and lo and behold, what do we have here?

Victoria Jackson (aka The Female Dennis Miller): I am sorry for you Vicky…You had it all. You were on SNL, you were loved, and then you ventured out on your own , and tragedy struck…You found out that staff writers are an awesome commodity, and now you have none.

You floated from guest spot to guest spot and then on to Celebrity Fit Club where you blamed your God-Fearing, Bible-Belting dad for your weight gain, when all along…

You should have realized that filling your mouth with a few more Our Fathers and a few less Hershey Bars would have saved both your soul and your waistline, but alas…

Judging from your inane verbal expositions on Wednesday’s episode of Politichicks, you have become nothing more than an overweight shark feasting on stereotypes of Muslims in hopes of rebuilding a career that has since faded like the desperate light of Diogenes.

Oh my Lawdy…These four ladies blow. They don’t just blow somewhat badly; they are the Great 1930’s Dustbowl of Suckdom, however, and in all fairness, here they are for your viewing pleasure, but my friends…


Tread carefully, for they know not what they speak, and well…that’ll become all too apparent to you shortly into their show…

Matt-Man

neshobadude@yahoo.com
http://twitter.com/#!/MattManIWS

22 comments:

Mike said...

Victoria Jacksons' mouth should be taped shut for the benifit of all humanity. Jannique Stewart sounds like she might have half a brain if someone could reprogram it.

I'm With Stupid said...

Mike: I know!! Did you listen to the entire clip...Holy Cow. These chicks are whacked, and I don't use hip/psychological lingo like that often. Cheers Mike!!

Matt-Man

Beth said...

This show is a train wreck. I couldn't look away. Even I was shocked at the effed up shit coming out of their mouths.

I'm With Stupid said...

Beth: I agree, but I can't stop replaying it. Cheers Schmoop!!

Matt-Man

A Beer for the Shower said...

Let me just say that those bio pictures are all VERY flattering, especially after seeing the 4 wildebeests in that video.

Also, maybe I'm just old, but I remember a time I thought Victoria Jackson was hot. Now her face looks like a catcher's mitt. And I can't take anything she says seriously with that awful, little-girl voice of hers.

Lastly, am I the only one that loves that this all takes place in a 'library'? Fun fact: having a talk in a library gives you credibility.

Okay, I'm done.

I'm With Stupid said...

I loved every second of that show. The skirts could be a little shorter, but other than that, they have all the makings of a HUGE internet hit sensation here.

Also, I'm glad these ladies recognize that conservative voices are being drown out and even ignored in the MSM. It's important for them to speak their minds loud and proud and not let the Liberal Intelligentsia shut them up!

Jay

I'm With Stupid said...

Beer: Ha. I used to think VJ was hot as well oh those years ago. And you're right on one thing...The only talented one in this venture is the person who took and/or chose the profile pics of the chicks. Cheers!!

Matt-Man

I'm With Stupid said...

Jay: Hee...Their claim that conservative voices are being drown out is as truthful as Jerry Sandusky claiming that he doesn't think Justin Bieber is HAWT. Cheers Jayman!!

Matt-Man

jack mehoff said...

ho-ly fuck

we are all now dumber

I'm With Stupid said...

Jack: Or at least more aware that there is no basement to the level of stupid in this world. Cheers Jack!!

Matt-Man

Doug DeLong said...

Well said. My favorite part was when the brunette sallied forth with a response to the whole "Muslims say 'Allah Akbar' before they cut the meat" nonsense. Perhaps overexcited to be making her first real contribution to the program, she said...

"Well, you know what else they say that before, er, you know what else they, uh, when they say that what else they say that before they do..."

Apparently they don't have enough money yet to hire an editor.

My review of the show can be found at:
http://nutsanddicks.blogspot.com

I'm With Stupid said...

Doug: I think they subscribe to the raw or not at all style of editing, which works for Jayman and me, but when a group's collective IQ appears to be roughly 87, a good editor would come in handy. I'll check out your review tonight, and Cheers!!

Matt-Man

Knight said...

I can't watch it. I just can't handle subjecting my self to this nonsense today. I don't want to live on this planet with these people.

I'm With Stupid said...

Knight: You have to watch...You must watch...C'mon Knight, stare into the Dead Lights. Cheers Hot Stuff!!

Matt-Man

Knight said...

Okay I watched 5 minutes. Is this a joke? A satire perhaps? I mean, that is a lot of crazy ignorance in one room.

I'm With Stupid said...

Knight: That's the same thing I thought, but alas...it is not. Cheers Knight!!

Matt-Man

My 2 Pesos said...

I hate FOX. :)

Mike said...

Holy crap. They have a second show up already. It's as good as the first. And Victoria Jackson still won't shut up.

I'm With Stupid said...

Pesos: I do too, but they provide us with a lot of unintentional comedic material. Cheers Pesos!!

Matt-Man

I'm With Stupid said...

Mike: Well, I shall have to check it out post haste. Thanks Mike!!

Matt-Man

Anonymous said...

Royal Misogynist Liberals aren't you wusses? Of course, that's why you don't get called on your lunacy. Perhaps you should get off your sister, move out of the basement, and join the glee club where you'll be welcome and possibly heard.

I'm With Stupid said...

Anoymous: Wusses? Jayman and myself, along with most of our readers and listeners, lay our opinions out there on a daily basis along with our names, email addresses, and pictures. You?

You hide behind anonymity and cowardice. So, well...blow me, pussy.

Cheers Spine-Less One!!

Matt-Man