Friday, September 16, 2011

Summy George...The IWS Searchlight of Help, Hope, and Happiness is Shining Upon You!!

Facebook can be a wonderful venue in which to meet new friends and reconnect with old ones, however…

Sometimes the stories and conversations that come up between friends old or new, can tug at one’s heart strings and even downright rip the myocardium right out of a person.

That very type of emotional infarction happened to me Thursday. You see…

I was sent a friend request on Facebook by a 26 year old woman of Spanish descent who lives in Lagos, Nigeria named Summy George.

Upon viewing one of the pictures in her profile…


I accepted, because I could tell that behind Summy’s twinkling eyes, lay a heart of sadness and despair…and maybe, just maybe, I could help her.

A half hour or so after accepting her friend request, I was sent a message from Summy via Facebook chat. She wanted to say hi, and introduce herself to me. I thought it was sweet of her.

I smiled at my monitor, said hi to her, and then with each word she typed, her anguish became all too apparent. My heart? It became heavy.

Summy told me how much she hated living in Africa, and longed to get away. I asked her, “Why?”

Summy said, “Too much suicide bombers and everywhere not safe again.” And then I asked her what she was going to do.

Summy replied, “I dunno. Can’t do anything ‘til I have money to fly. Fly to the USA.”

I told her that as Jayman and I produce an award winning and highly successful internet radio show and website, we could raise the money for her.

I could almost see the sob stained type running down my screen as she tearfully asked, “You can help me with ticket?” 

And then, to add penultimate sadness to my already aching heart Summy cried…

“I would love to come to USA. I’ve been there before because my dad lived there…before he died.”

Upon reading that, I vowed that I would turn on the IWS Searchlight of Help, Hope, and Happiness and ask you to aid Summy in her quest to come to these United States. She does after all, look like Lady Liberty…


Please aid me in our quest to bring Summy to her new home. A home free from terrorism, gangland killings, and the corruption brought on by newly found Nigerian petro-dollars.

She deserves better.

I am opening the Bagwine digs to her, so she has a place to stay. Jayman and I will find her gainful employment. All we need is from you is the money with which to purchase her airline ticket.

Summy is only requesting $350.00, but I know you all to be a generous lot, so c’mon, let’s send her $3,500. 

I know it is in your hearts and in your wallets. So, send the donations to Jayman or myself, and we can help Summy.

Together we can bring her to America, and once she arrives, instead of calling her Summy…we can, in unison, call her, Sunny!!

Cheers!!

Matt-Man
www.twitter.com/#!/MattManIWS

P.S.  If you can't make a monetary donation by all means go to her Facebook page (by clicking HERE) and offer her a word of encouragement.

P.P.S.  Look at her pictures and let me know if she has some serious camel toe going on or if she has two large, oblong gonads split and lifted by a man thong.

10 comments:

I'm With Stupid said...

I wonder if we can get Sally Struthers to help out with this.

Or Pernell Roberts.

And maybe Sarah McLachlan will let us use one of her songs?

The possibilities to help this poor, sweet girl are endless!

- Jay

I'm With Stupid said...

Jay: I was thinking the same thing, however the possibilities are somewhat endless, as Pernell Roberts is no longer living. He left the Ponderosa this past year, so it is up to us to brand her hide with a mark that says, "U.S.A."

Cheers, my philanthropic doppelganger.

Matt-Man

Mike said...

You realize that when you shine the IWS search light the IWS will be backwards in the sky. But Maybe that's how you attracted Summy.

I'm With Stupid said...

Mike: See? You think you are so damn clever, but what you don't know is that that picture was taken of a reflection in a mirror. Ha...Take that!! Cheers Mike.

Matt-Man

Beth said...

All I have to say is this better be a joke.

I'm With Stupid said...

Beth: Helping an aching soul escape the violence and shame of this world, all the while helping them reach their dream, is hardly a joke. Cheers Schmoop!!

Matt-Man

I'm With Stupid said...

Pernell Roberts, and all the good things he's done for underprivileged kids worldwide, lives on in my heart though. And on late night ads on TV too.

- Jay

Knight said...

Ha. You are such an easy target. I think what Summy really needs is a friend... any friend that will take her picture for her so it's not always in the bathroom mirror.

By the way, I need $350 to buy new lingerie. You guys want to help me fundraise?

MysteryChick said...

I would be more likely to contribute towards Knights lingerie purchase...

Vinny "Bond" Marini said...

In answer to your PPS, I would say the later, but if that is the case, some doctor used all the silicon in the world to make her have boobies

and the hips? Child-bearing hips indeed...one of you gonna give her a baby?