Matt coughs. Jay sneezes. You grab a surgical mask, and listen.
Matt: Hey Jay. Thanks for doing a Thursday morning phone call instead of our normal Thursday night.
Jay: No prob. I have people covering my pre-existing conditions, er…appointments.
Matt: This sore throat is a bitch. Hurts to eat, to drink, to talk. Oy.
Jay: Wow. Should I list you as probable, questionable, or doubtful for Sunday’s show?
Matt: What? Are you suffering from Fantasy Football withdrawal?
Jay: Not at all, why?
Matt and Jay: (Cough, Sneeze, Cough, Sneeze)
Jay: Hey? In this Sunday’s intro and since you are not well, should I replace your singing with a file off the bench? Say…Mitt Romney singing America the Beautiful in order to bolster our line-up?
Matt: Our Line-Up? Focus Man. Dear God. There is no Fantasy Football this ye---
Jay: Oh wow…Man I don’t know where my head was at. I am sorry. Okay I’m good to go now.
Matt: Okay. It’s all good.
Jay: Man…Between my allergies, your whatever, and now this withdrawal thing, we’re a medical mess.
Matt: No shit…It’s amazing how even simple medical maladies can screw one’s life up even for short periods.
Jay: IKR? I had to throw a half a plate of Lemon Poppy Seed muffins away, because I sneezed on them.
Matt: Really?
Jay: Well yes and no…I mean, I did sneeze on them, but I figured it was my own sneeze, so…I didn’t really throw them away.
Matt: Understandable. I guess you just considered them to be glazed at that point.
Jay: Exactly. It’s a sin to waste food, y’know.
Matt: (Cough)
Jay: Hey…This Sunday we could talk about all of this. You know, how it sucks to get sick.
Matt: It is that time of year. Cold and Flu season is fast approaching…obviously.
Jay: Exactly. We could talk about the times we have been sick.
Matt: Hospital stays.
Jay: Hot Nurses.
Matt: Funny diseases.
Jay: Death Panels.
Matt: The color of the gallon of funk they drained from my lung.
Jay: What color was that, exactly?
Matt: I guess you’ll have to wait til’ this Sunday at Noon ET to find out!!
Jay: Aw Man, this is gonna be epic. I may even impart what kind of Doctor I always wanted to be.
Matt: I have an idea as to what that might be.
Jay: Maybe so, but you won’t know for sure until this Sunday at Noon ET as IWS Radio presents…A Couple of Sickos.
Matt: I like it.
Jay: Me too.
Matt and Jay: I think we’re set.
Matt: Hey Jay. Thanks for doing a Thursday morning phone call instead of our normal Thursday night.Jay: No prob. I have people covering my pre-existing conditions, er…appointments.
Matt: This sore throat is a bitch. Hurts to eat, to drink, to talk. Oy.
Jay: Wow. Should I list you as probable, questionable, or doubtful for Sunday’s show?
Matt: What? Are you suffering from Fantasy Football withdrawal?
Jay: Not at all, why?
Matt and Jay: (Cough, Sneeze, Cough, Sneeze)
Jay: Hey? In this Sunday’s intro and since you are not well, should I replace your singing with a file off the bench? Say…Mitt Romney singing America the Beautiful in order to bolster our line-up?
Matt: Our Line-Up? Focus Man. Dear God. There is no Fantasy Football this ye---
Jay: Oh wow…Man I don’t know where my head was at. I am sorry. Okay I’m good to go now.
Matt: Okay. It’s all good.
Jay: Man…Between my allergies, your whatever, and now this withdrawal thing, we’re a medical mess.
Matt: No shit…It’s amazing how even simple medical maladies can screw one’s life up even for short periods.
Jay: IKR? I had to throw a half a plate of Lemon Poppy Seed muffins away, because I sneezed on them.
Matt: Really?
Jay: Well yes and no…I mean, I did sneeze on them, but I figured it was my own sneeze, so…I didn’t really throw them away.
Matt: Understandable. I guess you just considered them to be glazed at that point.
Jay: Exactly. It’s a sin to waste food, y’know.
Matt: (Cough)
Jay: Hey…This Sunday we could talk about all of this. You know, how it sucks to get sick.
Matt: It is that time of year. Cold and Flu season is fast approaching…obviously.
Jay: Exactly. We could talk about the times we have been sick.
Matt: Hospital stays.
Jay: Hot Nurses.
Matt: Funny diseases.
Jay: Death Panels.
Matt: The color of the gallon of funk they drained from my lung.
Jay: What color was that, exactly?
Matt: I guess you’ll have to wait til’ this Sunday at Noon ET to find out!!
Jay: Aw Man, this is gonna be epic. I may even impart what kind of Doctor I always wanted to be.
Matt: I have an idea as to what that might be.
Jay: Maybe so, but you won’t know for sure until this Sunday at Noon ET as IWS Radio presents…A Couple of Sickos.
Matt: I like it.
Jay: Me too.
Matt and Jay: I think we’re set.
