Hello, and I must say…
It’s finally good to meet you diligent readers of the IWS Radio website, and the rest of the world as well.
I know that you know my brothers, Joe Jr., John, Robert, and Teddy, but I bet you don’t know me.
Of course you don’t, because for years, I have been heaped into a burlap sack of obscurity, and thrown into the shadows of life like a bag of dirty potatoes with too many eyes.
I have struggled for years as to whether or not to open up, but, I have decided that I should, after Matt-Man asked me…
“Jesus Christ, dude? Do you want to be forever known as the guy who outside of Nick Varano’s Famous Deli, screams day, by sad day…
Could you throw me a blintz, or a piece of pastrami; I’m a Fucking Kennedy for God Sakes?”
That’s right…I am a fucking Kennedy.
Sure, much has been made about my brother JFK’s robust womanizing, but my dad Joe? Holy Cow!!
While unfounded rumors were swirling about Joe’s affair with Gloria Swanson, I was very much founded, and swirling around in Gloria Swanson’s uterus!! And let me tell ya, that wasn’t so bad, but anyhoo…
Gloria gave birth to me, and yet? I was looked down upon by the Kennedy clan, and seriously, I was taken aback.
So, that led me to thinkin’…
“Y’know…Teddy drowns girls in his car…Jack fucks anything that moves, and lobotomy girl hasn't a brain with which to think since she was 23, so why are they ignoring me?”
Well it became all too apparent in 2007, when Barack Obama decided to run for President.
My family, rather than acknowledge me, and send me on the path toward Presidential power, decided that maybe it was time for some low-down, low-key misanthrope to become President, because as we know, the Kennedys have that power.
All they really wanted to do, was to make sure that at some point. my bitchy cousin Caroline would become ambassador to Japan. Well I guess that via de profundis, they fucking made that happen, those, Happy as Hell in Camelot fuckers!!
They’re all mostly fucking dead now, and yet, I still can’t get a break.
Jesus Christ, if I could resurrect, and then shoot John and Bobby, and then make certain that it was Teddy who drowned, I would. I'd go Hyannis Port crazy in order to get a mere inkling of public acknowledgement and/or praise!!
Fuck it…They don’t care…Kennedys don’t like the Swansons…and that’s okay, however…
Keep in mind Caroline…Just like the French love Jerry Lewis, the Japs love Gloria Swanson, or if not now, they soon will.
Uh-huh,
Durwood Kennedy
mattmaniws@ymail.com
@mattman_iws
My Facebook Page
It’s finally good to meet you diligent readers of the IWS Radio website, and the rest of the world as well.
I know that you know my brothers, Joe Jr., John, Robert, and Teddy, but I bet you don’t know me.
Of course you don’t, because for years, I have been heaped into a burlap sack of obscurity, and thrown into the shadows of life like a bag of dirty potatoes with too many eyes.
I have struggled for years as to whether or not to open up, but, I have decided that I should, after Matt-Man asked me…
“Jesus Christ, dude? Do you want to be forever known as the guy who outside of Nick Varano’s Famous Deli, screams day, by sad day…
Could you throw me a blintz, or a piece of pastrami; I’m a Fucking Kennedy for God Sakes?”
That’s right…I am a fucking Kennedy.
Sure, much has been made about my brother JFK’s robust womanizing, but my dad Joe? Holy Cow!!
While unfounded rumors were swirling about Joe’s affair with Gloria Swanson, I was very much founded, and swirling around in Gloria Swanson’s uterus!! And let me tell ya, that wasn’t so bad, but anyhoo…
Gloria gave birth to me, and yet? I was looked down upon by the Kennedy clan, and seriously, I was taken aback.
So, that led me to thinkin’…
“Y’know…Teddy drowns girls in his car…Jack fucks anything that moves, and lobotomy girl hasn't a brain with which to think since she was 23, so why are they ignoring me?”
Well it became all too apparent in 2007, when Barack Obama decided to run for President.
My family, rather than acknowledge me, and send me on the path toward Presidential power, decided that maybe it was time for some low-down, low-key misanthrope to become President, because as we know, the Kennedys have that power.
All they really wanted to do, was to make sure that at some point. my bitchy cousin Caroline would become ambassador to Japan. Well I guess that via de profundis, they fucking made that happen, those, Happy as Hell in Camelot fuckers!!They’re all mostly fucking dead now, and yet, I still can’t get a break.
Jesus Christ, if I could resurrect, and then shoot John and Bobby, and then make certain that it was Teddy who drowned, I would. I'd go Hyannis Port crazy in order to get a mere inkling of public acknowledgement and/or praise!!
Fuck it…They don’t care…Kennedys don’t like the Swansons…and that’s okay, however…
Keep in mind Caroline…Just like the French love Jerry Lewis, the Japs love Gloria Swanson, or if not now, they soon will.
Uh-huh,
Durwood Kennedy
mattmaniws@ymail.com
@mattman_iws
My Facebook Page
4 comments:
I know it's probably been rough for Durwood, but at least he's still a Kennedy. That probably means he gets laid a lot.
Jay
Jayman: Whether she wants to or not...Cheers Jayman!!
Matt-Man
How on earth do you uncover all this dirt?
Beth: Because truth is very important to me, be it right out in the open or buried neath the stench of time. Cheers Schmooooop!!
Matt-Man
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