Matt runs off at the mouth, Jay runs off at the mouth, You amuse us by pretending to listen.
Jay: How did you know it was me?
Schmoop: I sensed your presence through the phone.
Jay: The phone was giving off a special vibe wasn’t it?
Schmoop: Yes, a special …. creepy vibe.
Jay: That’s kinda hurtful
Schmoop: I’m just trying to keep you guy’s success from going to your heads.
Matt & Jay: TOO LATE!
Schmoop: I knew it was a lost cause.
Jay: Don’t feel bad. You did your best.
Schmoop: I guess that’s all I can do. Wanna talk to Matt?
Jay: Meh … I guess.
Matt: Make it quick, I’m a busy man.
Jay: Oh really?
Matt: No
Jay: Me neither
Matt: Got any ideas for Sunday
Jay: Nope
Matt: Me neither
Jay: Well, there we go!
Matt: I think we’re ready!
Jay: Hey, why don’t we have a Wikipedia page yet?
Matt: I was just thinking about that when I was looking up Barabbas.
Jay: Why were you looking up Barabbas?
Matt: Oh just a “discussion” I was having with someone on Facebook.
Jay: Cool. Anthony Quinn was excellent in the movie.
Matt: I’ve never seen it.
Jay: Next bout of insomnia just turn on TCM and watch all night. You might catch it.
Matt: I’ll look for it.
Jay: Anyway, why no Wiki Page?
Matt: For the same reason we aren’t verified on Twitter.
Jay: Which is?
Matt: Social media sites just don’t recognize our greatness.
Jay: Bastard.
Matt: It hurts.
Jay: Life is nothing but an uphill climb for us.
Matt: More like a Three-Legged Sack race w/ Steven Hawking as a partner.
Jay: He’s pure dead weight.
Matt: It’s rough
Matt: So, what are we gonna talk about?
Jay: Have we done a religion show?
Matt: I don’t think so.
Jay: We could do that!
Matt: We have to! Porn one Sunday, religion the next!
Jay: It’s perfect!
Matt: This will be great.
Jay: We’ll just tell church stories
Matt: I’ve got enough of those
Jay: And sing Hymns
Matt: No, probably not that
Jay: Okay, other religious stuff.
Matt: Another #1 show coming up!
Jay: Probably. That’ll be up to God.
Matt: True
Jay: Okay, we’re ready!
Matt: Damn right!
So, don’t forget to tune in to “Religion: The Lighter Side” on I’m With Stupid on Sunday at 12 Noon ET! God will know if you are there or not. Just sayin’.
9 comments:
Y'know how she knew it was you, Jay? When you call and the phone rings, the Bagwine digs spontaneously smell like Drakkar Noir. Cheers!!
Matt-Man
God Bless you both! :) Miss
Jay, you're more than just dead weight. You're large quantities of dead weight. Always strive to be the best.
Can't wait to hear your church stories...what a perfect day to talk about religion...try not to offend, k boys!
Matt-Man: I've been using Drakkar since the 80's. It just seemed to go with my Delorean perfectly.
Jay
Miss: And God bless you too!
Jay
Mike: Thanks for the support and inspiration.
Jay
Jamie: Try not to offend? Uh, well, I can't promise anything on that front. ha! ;-)
Jay
I think you can write your own Wikipedia page and announce it on Twitter acting surprised. I bet that's what famous people do.
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