Matt-Man's 2014 Bucket List

Cheeeeeeeers and Happy New Year’s Eve to you all, you adorable Chuckleheads, you!!

It is indeed New Year’s Eve and you know what that means…

In addition to over imbibing, over eating, and having regretful post-stroke-of-midnight sex with somebody you wouldn’t have found attractive or even remotely likeable at 7 PM, we all make resolutions for the New Year!!

Well my friends, I am no different, but my resolutions are more of a Bucket List kinda thing for the year that lies ahead of us.  Following, is a list of what I want to do and/or accomplish during 2014.

1.  I am going to do my best to help Schmoop find a job whether she likes it or not.  Sorry Schmoop.

2.  I am going to look for a new job myself.  If I could find one that paid me enough to allow Schmoop to stay home, I would be a happy man.  I have never even remotely thought that way about any other woman in my life.

3.  I would like to get a CORPORATE sponsor for the IWS Radio Show.  Are we great show?  No.  Are we a pretty good show and website deserving of someone’s cash?  Yeah…and?  We’re usually Numero Uno. So, Ima gonna work on that.

4.  Sometime between June and September, I want to take a week off. Other than when I was in the hospital for a week in 2009 and unemployed for a couple of months in 2010, I haven’t had a week of real vacation since 2007.  The most I have gotten is two days off in row once every six-eight months.

5.  Considering the vacation thing and that I may assume a mild windfall of cash this year, I would like to take part of my week off and make a road trip to Redneckville, AR and finally in corporeal form, meet Jayman.

It would be an experience of a lifetime to go to Hudson’s “The People Pleasin’ Place” Grocery Store and Colton’s Restaurant with Jayman, and ultimately get thrown out of both establishments hand in hand.

6.  I would like to finally get divorced, annulled, and/or all-encompassingly dissoluted from my son’s mom. What the hell is up with that?  I know what it is, and I’ll explain it in Number 7.

7.  When and if Jayman and I make money on our show, the IWS Radio Corporation and monetary scale will be as so…Jayman CEO (50% of revenues), Schmoop CFO (49% of revenues), Matt-Man Bit Player (1% of revenues).  Don’t tell me that I’m not always thinkin’!!  Mommy Dearest will have no reason to still be married to me after that!!

8.  I am going to continue to be myself.  Some folks during the end of the year say things like, “I am going to be nicer.  More tolerant.”

Eh?  I am pretty nice, but I know that I am also a sarcastic asshole at times, and well, I like that.  It’s me, and I’m pretty good at it, so…I’m going to make sure that I remain that way.

9.  I am going to try Chocolate Almond Soy Milk……Ha!!  Yeah right.

10.  I am going to relax.  I may seem laid back and I am intellectually, but emotionally and in a physical sense, I never am.  Hell, I am already taking my shoes off more than usual, so, well…I am already making progress.

And in related news…Jayman and I did our first PRIMETIME IWS Radio Show this past Sunday and talked about stuff like this and it was a hoot!!

You should give it a listen…It will get you in the spirit of the New Year, and get your party preparations in high gear!!

Happy New Year, and Cheeeeeers!!

Matt-Man

mattmaniws@ymail.com
@MattMan_IWS
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Jayman's Bucket List

Hola dreamers! Since I’m still sick (I’m doing much better and feel pretty good, thanks for your concern) I don’t feel like do much writing and there really isn’t thing happening anyway.  On Monday I posted a list a dream interviewsfor the show. Today, I’m going to post my Bucket List.

1. Live near or right on the beach.  Preferably a beach side condo, but at really anywhere in a town that is on the beach would be great.

2. Eat a dinner in a really fancy "tie and jacket required" restaurant that is pretty famous.  Something like "Tavern on the Green" or "The Four Seasons."

3. Visit Israel.  I think this would be the most amazing trip ever.

4. Own a muscle car. One that wouldn’t be my every day car, but that I could hop in, roll down the windows, crank up the 80’s metal music and drive really fast around the back roads and have fun with.

5. Visit my family's ancestral home of County Armagh, Ireland.  And County Durham, England where they moved to before moving to the U.S.  And while there meeting some of my distant relatives.

6. Visit Civil War battlefields such as Gettysburg, Vicksburg and Manassas. And WWII battlefields in Europe too.

7. Read every book on the "Most Challenged Book List."

8. Attend an NHL, NFL and EPL game in person.  (I've already attended MLB and NBA games.)

9. Get a media pass to a major sporting event and be allowed to photograph it from field (or court) level.

10. Visit a Nevada brothel.  What? That would be a pretty unique experience!

11. Hike the Grand Canyon.

12. Drive across the country going from town to town in a Van that I can sleep in if I want.  Just seeing the sights and visiting famous places and roadside attractions and meeting people from all walks of life.

13. Anonymously purchase a new fire truck, ambulance or police car for a small town that is in need of one but doesn't have the money.

14. Visit New York City.  Stay in a nice hotel with great amenities, eat at Bobby Flay and Emeril Lagasse's restaurants and see all the sights and visit all the museums.

15. Learn to play either the piano or guitar. Then play on a street corner for donations.

16. Learn Spanish or French.

17. Live in a foreign country. Mexico, the U.K, the Netherlands, France or possibly Thailand. Not permanently, but maybe for a few years.

18.  Get paid to do something really cool and fun like ... IDK .. host an internet radio show maybe. haha

19. Buy my mother a nice condo that she is comfy living in.

20. Live in a house with a yard where I can have a garden and a dog.

21. Help someone build a house.

22. Sit down and have a conversation with a sitting President. Or play President Obama in a game of H.O.R.S.E. (Or even toss a baseball around with Pres Bush or toss a football around with Pres Clinton.)

23. Get something I wrote published and get paid for it. Doesn't really matter what or where or anything like that.

24. Scuba dive in a shark cage with sharks in the water.

25. Meet all of my blogging and twittering buddies.

26. Visit a nude beach.

27. Attend Oktoberfest in Munich.

28. Make a difference in someone's life.

29. Get a tattoo.

30. Spend at least a summer (3 months) living in a mountain cabin with no TV, no internet and no phone (except one for emergencies) just hiking, fishing, taking pictures, reading, writing and thinking.  And maybe going outside and yelling at the top of my lungs every once in a while. 

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