Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Hope Springs Eternal In Springfield, Ohio

Cheers and a Happy Tuesday to you all from cold, desolate, and depressing Springfield, Ohio...aka Bagwine, Ohio.

Last year, the Winter of 2013-2014 was brutal.  It got cold in November and the fungus of frigidity stayed around til' damn near May, and...it seemed to snow every damn day.  Not a lot, but an inch or two all the fricking way from November through April.

This Winter?  The winter of 2014-2015 hasn't been as bad overall, but it has at this point become more depressing.  Allow me to 'splain.

Last winter, the weather turned brutally cold and snowy right around Thanksgiving and continued through May.  It was constant.  By January, I never even looked at the weather forecast prior to going into the Beer Mine because I knew what the forecast was...COLD and a good chance of snow.  I got used to it, and expected it.

This Winter however, after a cold November, December and most of January were tame.  We had very little snow, and temps that weren't a great departure from seasonal averages.

We at the Beer Mine, (conveniently located at the corner of Elmore and Burnett Rd. in Bagwine, OH) and indeed all of the denizens of Bagwine, Ohio, were figuring on an average Winter and looking forward to an early Spring...and then?

February came...

Around February 9th, the temperatures plummeted and haven't jacked themselves off enough to get their impotent mercuries to rise out of the teens during the day while lying  flaccid in the below zero readings at night.  And on top of that...the snows have come.

After a nearly snow-less November-January, the snows have been raining down upon the greater Bagwine Metroplex leaving nothing but, high albedo, ill-used mixed metaphors, and or badly written allusions in their wake.

This February has been the most depressing February I can remember.  It has been fucking cold, and it has hampered my ability to be the creative and bon vivant person that I am, and that our vast and diverse worldwide IWS Radio expect, because unlike last year, this winter seemed to at first, be a less than snow-filled cupcake.

However, hope springs eternal...At the aforementioned Beer Mine, we have a board upon which I update how many days there are until Spring.  Sure, the owner Drive-By Mike chastises me and says to me...

"Spring is just an astronomical occurrence when the sun shines directly upon the equator during the vernal equinox.  It doesn't mean it will truly warm up."

Okay, he really doesn't say that in those terms, because well...he wouldn't know what that meant, but he does have a point.

However, as a pragmatic optimist, I have to believe that Spring with all of it's tulip bulbing, dogwood leaf bearing glory, is just around the corner.

If we can at some point, get into the thirties during the day, I could once again believe in seeing the pulchritudinal tulip bulbs burgeon into beautiful flowers on the plains of Bagwine, Ohio.

Cheers!!

Matt-Man

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4 comments:

I'm With Stupid said...

I like your positive outlook on life and am inspired to believe that it will turn warm here in God's Country soon too. Until then I have to wear wool socks and sleep under an electric blanket. I'M AN OLD MAN!

Jay

I'm With Stupid said...

Jay: Ha. Me too!! And as my filter is going out as I age, I will be happier and will piss off fewer customers once it warms up. Cheers Jayman!!

Matt

Mike said...

I think I made a stop in Springfield Ohio one time. It's been awhile but the memory still lingers.

I'm With Stupid said...

Mike: Your one stop still lingers with all of Bagwine as well Mike. Cheers!!

Matt