Holaaaaaaaaaaa! I couldn’t decide if I wanted to do headlines or hot takes tonight when I suddenly had a brilliant idea. I’ll do both! I’ll throw in some HI-larious headlines some hot takes on big topics of the day and maybe an observation or two about other things. O boy! This is gonna be fun. Maybe. Whatever.
I was watching the Golden Globes when Jeffrey Tambor won for the show “Transparent.” As he was giving his boring, soul-sucking brilliant and thoughtful acceptance speech I was thinking about him as the Mayor of Who-ville in the movie version of “How the Grinch Stole Christmas.” At one point in the movie the mayor throws a little fit and repeats “INVITE THE GRINCH – RUIN CHRISTMAS … INVITE THE GRINCH – RUIN CHRISTMAS!” over and over. So while he was talking all I could think of was “PLAY A TRANNY – WIN AN AWARD … PLAY A TRANNY – WIN AN AWARD!”
I thought about tweeting that, but you know that would have offended someone. We don’t want to do that now, do we? Oh sure, it’s true! If you play a transvestite or transgendered American or whatever you will at least get a nomination. If you play a gay character you will get a nomination and will probably win. Sean Penn won for playing Harvey Milk when we all know Frank Langella was far more deserving for his portrayal of Richard Nixon in “Frost/Nixon.” But, we’re not allowed to talk about these things cause that’s hurtful.
Here’s some headlines…
Mitt Romney announces he is considering making a third attempt to buy the U.S. Presidency.
French officials agree to allow Muslims to participate in freedom march, but remind them that hijabs are illegal.
Area sports fan is angry at self for forgetting to blame referees for his team’s loss.
Another Observation …
Have you noticed that not only are we not allowed to make rape jokes anymore, but we aren’t even allowed to mock rapists who get away with it?? I’ve seen it twice now. Once after Florida State lost to Oregon and Twitter lit up with all kinds of jokes about Jameis Winston and FSU. The next time was after the Golden Globes when some people got all pissy at Tina Fey and Amy Poehler for going after Bill Cosby.
After the FSU game there were several FSU alum trying to make the claim that mocking Winston and FSU was THE SAME THING as mocking the girl who was Winston’s alleged sexual assault victim. Same thing happened Sunday night. Mocking Cosby is THE SAME THING as mocking all 30 plus women he allegedly raped.
That’s bullshit. All these people are doing is trying to protect their school or friend or hero or whatever. They don’t give a shit about the victims because they don’t believe there are any victims. But, the problem is if this type of thinking takes hold, we won’t ever be able to make fun of anyone. And if that happens the scumbags that attacked Charlie Hebdo last week win.
Okay, more headlines …
New hacktivist group Uber Anonymous emerges as top rival to Super Anonymous who was the top rival of Anonymouser who took down Anonymous.
Fox News sets up Twitter account to combat fake Fox News stories. Can’t figure out which ones are real. Shuts down in 24 hours.
Facebook user can’t decide whether to post his outrage over fake news story from satire site or share shitty viral video.
A Hot Take …
No … Just. No.