Holaaaaaaaaaaa y’all! You know, my buddy Matt-Man has had to
shovel a couple of tons of snow every day down at the Beer Mine. It looks
pretty brutal and I guarantee you I wouldn’t do it. I try to have sympathy for
Matt and all that shoveling, but it’s tough to when I’m dealing with all the
shit that’s going on here.
Oh sure it was 63 degrees and sunny today. And I got to
spend the day watching all the fallout of the “Richard Sherman is a Big Scary
Black Man” incident after the NFC Championship game last night. And then there
are the general “Damn it’s nice to be a white male in America” benefits that I
enjoy daily. But, that doesn’t mean it was all sunshine, rainbows and Popsicles.
In fact, it was kind of a rough day.
It started with me having to take my laptop in for service. Poor
little fella! On Friday night I closed it and it went to sleep as usual, but then
on Saturday morning it didn’t wake up. The computer was running, but the screen
was black. I turned it off and back on and could hear the computer humming
away, but the screen was still black.
I’m hoping it’s not anything too major. Like, maybe it’s just
a little wire that broke or a switch that failed. I don’t know why I’m hoping
that though cause nothing in my life up to this point has given me any reason
to be positive or hopeful about just about anything. What really bothers me is
how when I explained to the chick down at the computer fix-it place what the
deal was she looked at me with this really “OMG THERE’S NO CURE FOR THIS!” look
on her face.
Then, to make myself feel a bit better, I decided to have a
couple of hotdogs for lunch. I got the little skillet to fry them up in on the stove
and put a plop of butter in it and grabbed the dogs out of the fridge.
Uhhhh yeah. 95% FAT FREE!!! Who in their right mind would
even consider making a product like this? I mean sure, I should have paid
closer attention to what I was grabbing at the store, but damn! It never occurred
to me that they would make something like this. As I said on Facebook, this is
practically tofu, right? Well, I tried it and just couldn’t do it. Barely got
halfway through one dog and just had to toss them out.
THUMBS DOWN TO THE 95% FAT FREE HOTDOGS!!!
Needless to say, by this time I was pretty bummed. My best
friend laptop was in the ER and my hotdogs were “healthy” and really gross. Things
just weren’t going my way today. So, to cheer myself up, I went on Twitter to
see what all the funny and happy people of the world were doing. Nothing ever
provides a better pick-me-up than laughing at the good folks of Twitter. Unless
it’s MLK Day of course…
Well, that didn’t work out as I hoped. What now? Okay, it’s
dinner time, last chance for happiness for today. I decided to go with a
semi-healthy and delicious meal of chicken tenders, artichoke hearts and pasta.
How was it? It was PERFECT!
1. Empty one can of extra small artichoke hearts into a
strainer, wash and drain thoroughly.
2. Cook up four decent sized chicken tenders on the stove with some garlic powder and Cavender’s. Don’t be afraid to get them “blackened” but no burned. Remove from pan and cut them up.
3. Heat the artichoke hearts up in a small amount of olive oil and ¼ sick of butter. Toss the cut up chicken in with them and squirt some lemon juice on them. Let simmer on low.
4. Cook 4 oz of spaghetti in a big pot of boiling water.
5. Drain spaghetti and then throw it in the pan with the chicken and artichoke. Maybe squirt some more lemon juice on the pasta.
6. Let sit in the pan and get happy together on low while garlic bread is cooking.
7. Once the garlic bread is done, serve with a white wine and eat it with your mouth.
2. Cook up four decent sized chicken tenders on the stove with some garlic powder and Cavender’s. Don’t be afraid to get them “blackened” but no burned. Remove from pan and cut them up.
3. Heat the artichoke hearts up in a small amount of olive oil and ¼ sick of butter. Toss the cut up chicken in with them and squirt some lemon juice on them. Let simmer on low.
4. Cook 4 oz of spaghetti in a big pot of boiling water.
5. Drain spaghetti and then throw it in the pan with the chicken and artichoke. Maybe squirt some more lemon juice on the pasta.
6. Let sit in the pan and get happy together on low while garlic bread is cooking.
7. Once the garlic bread is done, serve with a white wine and eat it with your mouth.
Then, enjoy your evening knowing that even if you experience
dead laptop monitors, fat-free hot dogs and idiotic tweets, you can still make
it all okay with food and wine.
2 comments:
You are amazing...While you are experiencing a heart choking couple of days, you take artichokes and cook a silver lining. You are the uber-man. Cheers Jay!!
Matt
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