What's Up With That?

Cheers and Happy and/or Observant Memorial Day to you all, especially those of you who are going to
spend the day testing out mattresses during the Serta sale in between beers and brats in honor of our fallen soldiers.

My Memorial Day experience culminated last night as I was thinking philosophically and introspectively.

And let me tell ya, I can’t believe that MS Word didn’t just red underline in my face and auto-correct.  I just spelled everything correctly…wow, and anyhoo…

As today we observe Memorial Day for our fallen soldiers, allow me as well, to honor my self.  For while I am not dead, I am pretty damn close…both nearly literally, and definitely, very much figuratively.

Oh Hooooooooooo, such a fancy braggadocio kinda guy you say…No, not really, you say?

Well I say…”What’s Up With That?”

As much as I am a dreamer and creative kinda guy, I am also unfortunately, very logical, very statistical, and unlike with others, very cynical when it comes to me, so I want my limited years left on this Earth to be enjoyable and so…I ask myself and you, “What‘s Up With That?”

To proceed…

My computer chair will not recline as I type this.  Why, you ask?  Oh no reason…and yet tomorrow?  My computer chair, with no warning nor announcement, may decide to recline like a muthafuckah.  “What’s Up With That?”

Yesterday afternoon after a tiny spat, I walked into the bedroom and asked Schmoop if she wanted to have make up sex.  She said, “Can we do it while I sleep; if not, no.”  “What’s Up With That?”

And after Ryno graduates this Saturday, I am going to ask myself, “Why I am still giving his mom money after she kept me away from him all these years?”  “What’s Up With That?”

Today, I will work at the Beer Mine from 12-9, and upon, and after, listening to the owner and a customer with a couple of kids give me shit, I will think, “What’s Up With That?”

My sister sent me a graduation notice of her kid’s Open House, yet won’t come over while I do her taxes at no cost.  Hmmmmm?  “What’s Up With That?”

I love people, and yet at the same time, HATE them…“What’s Up With That?”

This chair not reclining while I type this, is really fucking pissing me off…”What’s Up With That?”

Doc Thompson is doing morning radio on The Blaze network for Glenn Beck (but I doubt for long.)… “What’s Up With That?”

I appear to be bitching and acting like an old Jewish woman who hasn’t heard from her Shiksa-Marrying son in three years…“What’s Up With That?”

Y’know…

Someday maybe some of these people will ask…

“Hey?  Where’s Mahoney?  He’s Always Here, and Always Funny…What’s Up With That?”

Cheers!!

mattmaniws@ymail.com
@mattman_iws

Annnnnnnd Ladies and Gentlemen, and I use the terms loosely, we had one helluva Memorial Day Show yesterday...We were funny, charming, "solemn", and the lovely Canadian Jamie chimed in.  If you missed it live, you can catch it all right here:

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