Sarah Palin™ Kicks Off The Weekend for IWS

Hi Y’all, and Happy Weekend to ya!!

You’re probably askin’ yourself…

Is that Sarah Palin™ on the IWS website?  And I have to tell ya…

Darn Right it is!!  Ha!!  You thought I was gonna say, “You Betcha!!”, didn’t ya?

I’m fillin’ in for Matt-Man today because he drank a bottle of Wild Irish Rose last night and he doesn’t drink it very often anymore.  Well let this mama bear tell ya…It knocked him on his derri--, um his dery--, er…his…ass.

Seems to me that Matt-Man should have had a tea party last night rather than a gutter wine party, but that’s just me.  Thank God Bristol Palin™ wasn’t there with him, because she would be waking up pregnant right about now.  Anyhoo….

We have a huge weekend on tap this weekend.  Tomorrow is the running of the 2,013 Kentucky Derby.  Can you even imagine that?  The earliest Kentucky Derbies involved powerful horses pulling chariots piloted by the likes of Ben-Her and Julius Kaiser.  It’s true.

And guess what?  There is going to be not only a cowgirl riding one of the horses this year, there is going to be a black fella riding one.  Which can mean only one thing…

President Obama has instituted oppressive government quotas on one of the last remaining pieces of Americana and freedom that is the Kentucky Derby.  It wasn’t good enough that black people happily jockey lawns, Obama mandated that they be put atop fine thoroughbreds as well.

I think that since the President failed to take the guns from the hands of white people, he decided to put Mexican jockeys out of work.  Which is funny, since he seems to want to let every darn wetback into this country.  What a freedom hating feminine hygiene product he is.

But I digest…

On Sunday, there will be a lot of parties taking place in honor of Cinco de Mayo.  In case you are unfounded, Cinco de Mayo is the celebration of Richard Hellmann’s invention of mayonnaise in 1905.  I have no idea why, but I think the celebration should be referred to as 19-0-Cinco!!

But that’s just me, Sarah Palin™

I am always amazed as to why so many Mexicans celebrate Cinco de Mayo because I have never seen anyone put mayo on a taco or burrito, or that one thing…a….chimney chonga?  Crazy names!!

Another big thing on Sunday?  Jay and Matt will be doing their wacky IWS Radio show from Noon-2 P.M. ET on Blog Talk Radio.  Ha!!  Those two are crazy funny, and they have a couple of guests this week.

They will be hanging out with Dana who recently had sleeve gastrectomy surgery in order to get her weight under control.  She is going to talk about they whys, hows, and wheretofores that she did this.  It’s goin’ to be interesting, but I already know one thing.  The why?

Obamacare forced her against her will to have it done, and you and I are paying for it!!  Yep, Sarah Palin™ just said that out loud.

They will also be talking to a real live Mexican named Luis who is one of the Latino types that celebrates Cinco de Mayo.  I bet Luis, if that’s his real name, will be talking to Jay and Matt on his Obama Phone while eating tacos and burritos purchased with is EBT Card!!

Anyhoo…As you know now, it’s gonna be a HUGE weekend and I hope y’all hang out with IWS Radio Sunday and enjoy your Derby de Cinco de Dana de Luis de IWS Radio weekend.

My man-slave Todd and I, Sarah Palin™ will be in Houston for the NRA Conference, enjoying trigger finger excitement and Chik-fil-A sammiches.

Until Matt-Man passes out early again,

Sarah Palin™

mattmaniws@ymail.com
@mattman_iws