Saturday, April 6, 2013

Matt Said, Jay Said: 24.7.365



Matt inhales, Jay exhales, You close your eyes and pray for the sweet release of death.

Matt: Don’t say anything funny while I’m inhaling.
Jay: How bout when you’re exhaling?
Matt: That’s okay.
Jay: Kinda weird.
Matt: Why?
Jay: Cause you’re pretty much only inhaling or exhaling, right?
Matt: No.
Jay: So you spend a lot of time not breathing?
Matt: NOOO .. Inhaling when I’m smoking silly!
Jay: Ohhhhhhhhh
Matt: Don’t say anything funny when I’m inhaling my cigarette.
Jay: I’ll try.
Matt: I need you to do more than try.
Jay: Dude. I can’t always control the funny.
Matt: Well, that’s a good point.
Jay: AAAAAAAAAND
Matt: Don’t say it.
Jay: You should stop inhaling.
Matt: Can I exhale?
Jay: I guess, but what’s the point.
Matt: Whatever. I’ll quit when I feel like it.
Jay: Whatever.

Matt: Mushroom burgers for dinner tonight.
Jay: Delicious!
Matt: What are you having?
Jay: Spaghetti
Matt: Oh yeah! We had skets last weekend.
Jay: What the hell is “skets?”
Matt: “Skets” … “Sketti” … “Spaghetti?”
Jay: You made that up!
Matt: Yeah.
Jay: You Ohio people … Just making shit up.
Matt: Schmoop and I call Spaghetti “Sketti” or “Skets”
Jay: I guess I can see “sketti” but not “skets”
Matt: What’s the difference?
Jay: “Skets” sounds like the plural of “Sketti”
Matt: And?
Jay: Did you have multiple spaghetti dinners?
Matt: Actually, yes.
Jay: Uhh … Well OKAY THEN!

Matt: Got a title for Saturday’s show?
Jay: Hookers and Blow?
Matt: Ha! And talk about ….
Jay: Golf and the weather I guess.
Matt: Well, we can preview The Master’s
Jay: Exactly! And, IDK, the FINAL FOUR!
Matt: Right! Obviously, this weekend needs Slyder Balzcock.
Jay: Definitely. And we can talk about Kevin Ware’s leg.
Matt: *shudder*
Jay: IKR? Have you done a Google Image Search for that?
Matt: Fuck no!
Jay: Good choice. Oh! Leno out at NBC!
Matt: Speaking of a whore!
Jay: Exactly! We might have thoughts on Kamala Harris.
Matt: And maybe just all the Media Whores in general.
Jay: Oh yeah, we can go on and on about that all day.
Matt: And maybe Kirk Douglas weather for the Master’s.
Jay: He can do it!
Matt: This is gonna rock!
Jay: Maybe we’ll call a few people?
Matt: And maybe they’ll pick up!
Jay: Wouldn’t that be cool!
Matt: Okay, we’re ready!
Jay: Damn right we are!

Be sure to tune into “Hookers and Blow” on IWS Radio this Sunday at 12 Noon ET!!! 


3 comments:

Jo said...

I didn't realize that was Jessica Alba until I saw the tag. What is this Final Four?...and Leno is leaving?!

I just Googled Kevin Ware to see how he's doing and clicked some links and somehow ended up reading all about gluten intolerance. This is why I can't look these things up myself. The world is so fascinating I need to stay home with a towel wrapped around my head.

Mike said...

'..and pray for..'

OK I'm waiting.

I'm With Stupid said...

We should have scheduled Marion Berry to appear. Cheers!!

--Matt