This is an IWS World Media Special Report: Matt-Man and Jayman Excommunicated from the Catholic Church. We received this from our special correspondent, Matt-Man’s brother Denny, who is said to be “tight” with the Pope…
VATICAN CITY – In one of his last decrees before stepping down, Pope Benedict XVI today announced that he has excommunicated “I’m With Stupid’’ blog creators Matt Man and Jayman.
“These evil souls will rot in the eternal fires of hell for their continued blaspheme not only of the one and only true Catholic God out there, but also against the one true God’s voice on earth – me,’’ the pope said in a statement. “They must pay for their sins, and what better way to do that than to bar them from all the benefits the church, such feasting on tasty bread and sweet wine each week.’’
Benedict, who reportedly is stepping down to spend more time with his very close longtime confidant Rev. Fritz von Goering, said Matt Man and Jayman are “the embodiment of Western civilization’s decline into heresy and hedonism. I must make them an example of what happens to all those who spit in the eye of God and the Vatican. I can only hope that this drastic action I am taking will cause them to pause to reflect on behavior that can only be classified as ‘ungodly and uber fucking disgraceful.’ May almighty God (praise be upon him) have mercy on their putrid souls.’’
11 comments:
Damn that's a bit harsh, even coming from a Nazi!!
Matt-Man
This is so awkward, do I pray for you or throw rocks? Wait, the Lutherans will take you!
P.S.
The totally unbreadlike wafers are not tasty! And the communal wine cup?...that's how you get the syphilis!
I went over to Everyday Jay from Flamingora this morning and heard something coming from the headphones on my desk.
I picked them up and it was IWS.
It was nice to hear your voices again (it's been quite a while), so I listened (to the show on writing).
Thanks for the chuckles, you Chuckleheads! You always make me laugh, and it makes me smile to hear you laugh.
Keep on keepin' on.
Diiiiiiiiiice!! Thanks for stopping by and for listening. We go LIVE again today at 11 AM ET...Cheers Dice!!
Matt-Man
Did one of you say that the Earth moved around the Sun again?
Matt: He's just so hateful!
Jay
Jo: Of course the Lutherans will take us! They'll take anyone, even the people the Methodists won't take.
Jay
Dice: Thanks so much. I'm glad you enjoyed the show. Join us sometime! ;-)
Jay
Katy: We talked all kinds of nonsense about condoms saving lives and how the church's opposition to them, especially is Africa shows that their "sanctity of life" stuff is pure bullshit. They're kinda touchy about that kind of thing.
Jay
What's up, just wanted to mention, I liked this blog post. It was helpful. Keep on posting!
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I don't think it's a bad thing. Since you're being blessed with anonymous spammers right now. :p
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