Thursday, August 30, 2012

Creepy Kid Next Door: Oh Yeah...This Man is a Senior!!

Hi IWS Radio and Website Heads!! Guess who is back?

That’s right…THIS GUY!!

I’m Creepy Kid Next Door and you haven’t seen me in a long, long while have you?

Darn right you haven’t, because you know what this sexy, now a Senior in High School has been doing?

STUFF!!  Ha!!

Stuff you would like to know about, but never will, because it’s stuff that I’M doing.  Got it !?

Uh-huh.  I don’t let anyone, know anything about my stuff.

My stuff is kept secret to me and a few of my only slightly removed from puberty, posse, because if I were to share what I do in my private life, MTV would copy it, and hire quasi-actors to do a quasi-real life type of show to present it.

CKND, is all up, and down, for a good reality TV show, just don’t taint my brand.  My brand, is MY brand. Do you hear me Viacom Media?  Just step off, and back away from my life, or I’ll cut you, well…

I won’t; I have people for that, and my mom and dad could easily cut a Viacom bitch by hiring a lawyer.

Anyway, I just started my Senior year of High School and let me tell, I am like an Adonis now that I have reached the Mt. Olympus of High School hierarchy.

I’m like the, Zeus Kid Next Door.  I tell the little people what to do. I eat their livestock on a whim, and their women?  I just say, “Hey, I’m CKND, wanna go out?”

I mean, I always knew I was born to greatness, but Holy Cow, I never expected this!!

Some of you who know me, know that I am a baller.  I can sink 91 three-point shots in 5 minutes, but did you know that this year, I am also running Cross-Country?

It’s true.  And…I am a badass at it.

We already had our first meet, and me, my Adonis-like body, and my size fourteen and a half feet came in at 22 plus minutes.  Not nearly the fastest speed, but you know what?  I looked sexy doing it, and…That is what it is all about.

Oh sure, I heard that that IWS Matt guy reported on the air that I fell, tripped, or got knocked over three times in my first meet on the IWS Radio Show, but so what?

You know what else fell, got tripped, and or knocked over?  His FACE!!

Some people are always gonna hate.  Even gonna hate someone like me.  That’s sad.

I didn’t want to run Cross Country, but I did it to stay in shape for basketball and to be true to my school, the Matt-Man does a radio show to be true to his rude.  Ha Ha!!

Looks like somebody just leveled the playing field.  Take that, Mr. Funny Matt-Man.

Anyway, it’s my Senior year of High School, and I am going to enjoy it, because the cheerleaders love me.

You know why?

Because, I am a Senior, and...

I’m a runner and a baller, and most importantly…

In spite of my sarcastic nature and off the cuff sleights toward my dad, I think I have finally matured.

YOUR FACE STILL SUCKS,

CKND

mattmaniws@ymail.com
@MattMan_IWS

In other news...Jayman and I celebrated the end of our 2nd year on the air and we did it with style, as we talked to Shirley, Warrior Kat, and Natalie...It was awesome, so if you missed it, give it a listen:

12 comments:

I'm With Stupid said...

I'm loving the humility dude! You're maturing by the day. We're all so proud of you here at IWS.

Jay

I'm With Stupid said...

Jayman: What else can he do? He's the ma...Oh I'm sure he'll figure out something else to do, and it won't be good. Cheers Jayman!!

Matt-Man

Anonymous said...

Love that kid!! :) Again, the apple didn't fall far
from the tree!! Missy

I'm With Stupid said...

Mischie: I would never act like that...I was and am still to this day, an honorable and respectable member of society, and well...I was awful at basketball. Cheers Miss!!

Matt-Man

Anonymous said...

I know you are and so is your great kid!! :)

Mike said...

'..I think I have finally matured.'

HEY! Stop that! You have a Mahoney tradition to uphold.

I'm With Stupid said...

Miss: You are so misguided. We are heathens..He just happens to be able to hit a three point shot like nobody's business. Cheers Miss!!

Matt-Man

I'm With Stupid said...

Mike: His respectful, yet sarcastic way, makes me proud every day. Cheers Mike!!

Matt-Man

Knight said...

Hmm, this sounds suspiciously like a proud papa actually wrote it.

I'm With Stupid said...

Knight: Me? Noooooooo. Journalistic integrity is the flagship of our site. I would never besmirch that...or something. Cheers Knight!!

Matt-Man

Jo said...

This kid is a lot like the creepy kid that lived behind us and was always at his bedroom window with binoculars.

Also, hooray for DOMINATING Blog Talk Radio!!!

I'm With Stupid said...

Jo: I know this kid somewhat, and you don't know how creepy this little shit is. And thanks for using the word, "dominating"...When you use it, it is HOT!! Cheers Jo!!

Matt-Man