Monday, July 23, 2012

Weeds

"The weeds keep multiplying in our garden, which is our mind ruled by fear. Rip them out and call them by name."

--Sylvia Browne

“Weeds are fucking annoying, and you can go to Hell bitch.”

--Matt Mahoney

“Grow Strong Grass & Control Weeds, Bugs”

--Scotts® Lawn Care With Scotts®

Y’know..?  Sometimes being right, not only gets boring…It gets old.

Jayman, I, and the staff here at the IWS Worldwide Headquarters have so often put the collective dick of Time-Warner, Ozarks CW, Google Plus, You Tube, into the confines of internet blow me soil, and now….

The Springfield Regional Medical Center, is the latest corporate entity to taste our county fair form of justice juice, and “next to the swine barn” type, go fuck yourself funnel cakes.

Damn right.

Last Thursday while sitting on the porch of the palatial digs, I was looking at this:


The anger, fueled by local corporate callousness, churlishness, and too much NOS and Rose I stood there while being accosted by a five foot tall Bulgarian chick brandishing a Glock as I took pictures of the aforepictured weeds..

However…

I persevered, sent my pics, and notified the owners and newspaper that IWS was going to make the owners of the abandoned hospital look baaaaaaaaaad for not cutting their weeds and being a less than responsible corporate citizen.

What happened?

Two days later….there was a crew dispatched to cut down the weeds, and they had some success:


Jayman and I might not be giant killers, but…

When we put our minds to something in which we believe, it is taken care of.

Like yesterday…We did a show on IWS Radio about the weather, and sure enough, we managed to finish it.


Anyhoo…When things are needed to be taken care of, call IWS, because, well… Jay and I are like Starsky and Hutch, and we always get our man….or something. Cheers!!
mattmaniws@ymail.com
@mattmaniws

16 comments:

I'm With Stupid said...

People running for office believing they can make a difference when then get there can a learn a thing or two from us. You can change the world a little at a time through tenacity, hard work and sometimes foul language.

Jay

Anonymous said...

Yay! Eyesore taken care of thanks to IWS!! Great job!! Miss!

I'm With Stupid said...

Miss: The arms of our media empire and influence reach far and wide, so don't think you are safe from us groping you. Cheers Miss!!

Matt-Man

I'm With Stupid said...

Jay: We are sooooooo above them, and...we while many may not believe it, we have principles. Cheers Jayman!!

Matt-Man

Mai Yang said...

oh. I was thinking of something else. geez. HAHA!

well, what can I say? got weeds on our front yard and we're doing nothing but admire the messiness it's causing.

Mike said...

Sometimes all it takes is one phone call. If no one calls, no one cares.

Edita said...

You're like the ghostbusters of weeds. Weedbusters or something. Y'know?

Beth said...

You go boy!

I'm With Stupid said...

Mai: Enjoy your buzz and you delightful messiness. Cheers Mai!!

Matt-Man

I'm With Stupid said...

Mike: Damn right. And it helps to make the one call to the right one. Cheers Mike!!

Matt-Man

I'm With Stupid said...

Edita: Ha. I guess we are. Cheers Edita!!

Matt-Man

I'm With Stupid said...

Beth: I'd like to Go. You know!? Cheers Schmoop!!

Matt-Man

Jo said...

The power of IWS is awesome.

They really ought to pick up the trimmings though. And maybe plant some drought-tolerant nonsense in the bitter soil of their defeat.

Knight said...

I'm mostly in shock you quoted Sylvia Brown.

I'm With Stupid said...

Jo;;;Yeah that was mentioned between Schmoop and I, but, they did what they did and actually did the entire surroundings today. A letter of apology would be nice though. Cheers Jo!!

Matt-Man

I'm With Stupid said...

Knight: Ha...I was more in shock that I quoted a Scott's fertilizer ad. Overpriced shit. Cheers Knight!!

Matt-Man