Freeing the Nipple is Hard Work

Holaaaaaaaaaa y’all! So the Great Booby Debate of 2015 is off to a rip-roaring start! Yesterday’s post by Matt-Man stirred up some action. So far the reaction has been positive, but there’s still more to do. Matt and I will be discussing this further on IWS Radio this coming Sunday. We have figure out how to go about this new world of Freeing the Nipple on the IWS Blog.

What kind of limits do we put on booby pics? How often will they appear? What about promoting the blog on social media? Does it have to be listed as Not Safe For Work? Who will be the first sniveling little bitch to flag one of our posts on Facebook or Twitter or whathaveya? Aaaaaaaaaand if boobs are okay then surely butts are too, right?

And how ethical do we want to be about this. Do we want to be fine upstanding honest bog citizens and actually post what our headlines say? Or do we want to be internet tricksters like everyone else and post a headline like “Kate Upton Topless!!” and then post THIS …

Oh sure, she’s topless, but she’s not TOPLESS! You know what I mean? She’s not wearing a top, but her arm is strategically placed to ruin everything for the excited folks who clicked the link. That’s kind of a dick move, but it does produce clicks.

Speaking of clicks … Is this blog going to become a clickbait blog? Is that all we’re going for now? Will we no longer be posting deep, insightful and HI-larious stuff? Or will we mix it up. Keep practicing our craft while from time to time throwing in a hot topless celebrity? Orrrrrrrr are we going to post the topless celebrity pics in out brilliant posts giving the internet a little bit of sexiness and brilliance? That sounds like a good idea, but we’ll see.

Of course we could go full lists, viral videos, funny & sexy gifs and naked chicks all the time. We’ll be IWS Buzzfeed using headlines like "The 69 Hottest Moments in Movie History!" Or “The 37 Times a Naked Miley Cyrus Totally Ruled the Internets!” Or “192 Times Taylor Swift Made us Feel Better About Humanity!” Or “9,649 Times a Naked Kim Kardashian Totally Grossed Us Out!” And then things like “Sarah Palin’s 100 Funniest and 12 Serious Gifs!”

I don’t know about the viral videos. Those get posted 9,428 times to Facebook before we could ever post them here. So those are probably out. Man I fucking hate those! Seriously y’all viral videos are all I ever see on my Facebook newsfeed these days. This man tried to pet a Komodo Dragan and what happened next will amaze you! Who fucking cares? All that heartwarming crap bores me.  But, cute puppy gifs? Those totally rule! We can include those.

So, as you can see this is some deep, complicated shit here. We’re gonna have to talk about it and set some guidelines and stuff like that. Freeing the nipple is not nearly as easy as it seems.

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Dogs and Cats are Are People Too!

This week we're doing something a little different for our "Person of the Week." In keeping with the "All Give and No Take" theme of this week's IWS Radio, we are celebrating sweet puppies and kitties who love unconditionally and give and give and give.

Here's Belle the Corgi ...

Here's the stray cat that adopted Jayman for a while ...

Here's Duchess the high-spirited puppy ...

Here's Abner the shy kitty ...

Here's Lucy and Cosette the PBGV's ...

Here's Matt-Man's OTHER BFF Corky ...

Don't forget to tune into IWS Radio for our "All Give and No Take" episode at 8 PM ET tonight!!!

Matt Said, Jay Said 36-24-36 (ish)

Matt Slurs, Jay Slurs, You have another drink ... 

Matt: Hellooooooo  Jay: I’m not here
Matt: Me neither.
Jay: I’m too busy for this.
Matt: Me too!
Jay: Totally!
Matt: Can’t be bothered.
Jay: Well, not really.
Matt: Yeah, I’ve got time.
Jay: Just not this week.
Matt: Pretending to do family shit?
Jay: Not pretending dude! Family is here.
Matt: Even the dogs?
Jay: The dogs are here and they’ve taken over!
Matt: They’ll take charge of everything if you let them.
Jay: We’ve already let them.
Matt: That’s kind of sad.
Jay: Yeah, but they’re cool dogs.
Matt: Well, that’s okay then.

Matt: How was your Fourth of July?
Jay: Outstanding! Red, White and BBQ!
Matt: God Bless America!
Jay: Hell yeah! How was yours?
Matt: Well, Rally’s was closed.
Jay: What??
Matt: It’s an outrage, isn’t it!?
Jay: They denied good, Christian Americans hamburgers?
Matt: On Independence Day no less!
Jay: Commie Bastards!
Matt: Maybe they should change their name to Khrushchev’s Burgers.
Jay: Hey-OOOOOO!
Matt: Or Ho Chi Minhute Burgers.
Jay: Or Pol Burger Pot!
Matt: Leonid Burgzhev!
Jay: That was good stuff right there.
Matt: No bad.
Jay: Especially for two people who aren’t here.
Matt: Good point.

Jay: So this week’s show? Matt: What about it?
Jay: Got any ideas?
Matt: Well, I was thinking.
Jay: Oh dear.
Matt: No, it’s fine.
Jay: Okay
Matt: We could just wing it!
Jay: We could!
Matt: We’ll just hang out and shoot the breeze.
Jay: We’ll be live without a net!
Matt: Just like a Wallenda.
Jay: Pfft .. We’ll show Wallenda how it’s done.
Matt: We’ll talk about week
Jay: And out All-American 4^th of July activities.
Matt: Yeah, stuff like that.
Jay: And whatever else we think of.
Matt: We’ve got the talent to do it!
Jay: Probably.
Matt: It’ll be HUGE!
Jay: Less prep = better show
Matt: That’s the way it works.
Jay: Okay, we’re ready.
Matt: Always!

Be sure to catch Matt and Jay LIVE this Sunday on I’m With Stupid at 12 Noon ET!

Matt Said, Jay Said XXII

מאט מדבר, מדבר ג'יי, אתה מקשיב.

Matt: “Thank you for calling our happy home, Matt speaking.”
Jay: “Hi drunk, I’m Matt.”
Matt: “My God man, the sun hasn’t even set!”
Jay: “Is that a problem?”
Matt: “Don’t you have any social graces?”
Jay: “I reject society’s arbitrary unwritten rules.”
Matt: “I guess I just come from a better class of people.”
Jay: “You and Willard Romney.”
Matt: “Noooo … The Romney’s are so uncouth, I’m more like the Rothschild’s”

Matt: “We have a new mascot down at the Beer Mine.”
Jay: “Oh really? Is it of the blow up variety?”
Matt: “You sick fuck. No, it’s a stray cat who has adopted us.”
Jay: “Awwww how sweet.”
Matt: “She is sweet. I named her ‘Depot’ in honor of the name of the Mine.”
Jay: “That’s pretty clever. Did you get her some cat food?”
Matt: “Oh yeah, she’s got a food and water dish.”
Jay: “Does she have a little bed to sleep on.”
Matt: “Yup, she sleeps in the bathroom at night.”
Jay: “Cool. I can’t stand to see animals suffer.”
Matt: “Me neither.”

Jay: “Last Saturday’s show finally showed up in the rankings.”
Matt: “I know, but I still think we’re getting screwed.”
Jay: “You know, I was thinking.”
Matt: “Jay, beer thoughts are usually bad thoughts.”
Jay: “No, no this is good.”
Matt: “Alright.”
Jay: “You’ve got over 300 ‘friends’ on Facebook, right?”
Matt: “Yeah, and I know where you’re going here.”
Jay: “Combined we have like 500 friends.”
Matt: “And if they all just HIT PLAY we would move further up the board.”
Jay: “And get more exposure resulting in even MORE plays.”
Matt: “They wouldn’t even have to listen if they didn’t want to.”
Jay: “Exactly! Even though they should cause we’re fucking funny.”
Matt: “Oh hell yes. But, they could listen once, and then just play a second time.”
Jay: “Right, even I don’t listen to us twice.”
Matt: “Noooo ... Usually I turn it on and say ‘Shut up assholes!’”
Jay: “Yeah, I yell ‘Not these fucking guys again!’ at the computer.”
Matt: “Anyway, hitting #1 once would be cool.”
Jay: “I know. And those 9 or 10 shows ahead of us all suck.”
Matt: “Have you listened to them?”
Jay: “No. I’m just bitter because I’ve never been #1 in anything.”
Matt: “No more beer for you.”
Jay: “Why?”
Matt: “Because you’re drinking SADdweiser.”

Jay: “What are we talking about on Saturday’s show?”
Matt: “Why women suck?”
Jay: “That’s perfect. A couple more beers and I’ll have enough material by myself.”
Matt: “Okay Jay, that’s really enough drinking for today.”
Jay: “You’re not my mother.”
Matt: “Time to take a nap.”
Jay: “I don’t need a nap.”
Matt: “No, I was talking about me.”
Jay: “Oh! Nite, nite.”
Matt: “Goodnight.”

So there you go folks. Genius in action. Also, don’t forget to listen to I’m With Stupid on Saturday at 11 PM ET as we talk about Why Women Suck!