Matt Said, Jay Said...888-836-7025

Matt strains to hear...Jay whispers...You say, what the fuck?

Matt:  Hello?
Jay:  hello.
Matt:  HELLO?
Jay:  matt…it’s me, jayman.
Matt:  JAY!?
Jay:  shhhh…keep it down.
Matt:  What?  Why the hell are you whispering?
Jay:  i’m at nana creta’s funeral and this is our only chance to prep before sunday’s show.

Matt:  oh okay…how’s the funeral going?
Jay:  oh fine, i haven’t embarrassed myself yet.
Matt:  excellent…is your hair still holding its own again the wind and the elements.
Jay:  it looks pretty damn good…if i do say so, myself.
Matt:  you just did.
Jay: i know right?

Matt:  hey…our show this sunday is a blog talk radio staff pick.  we need to be “on it.”
Jay:  i know…it’s as if btr knew i was grieving and vulnerable and decided to finally feature our show.
Matt:  it’s as if those bastards know when we aren’t ready.
Jay:  that’s okay; we’ll adapt and overcome.

Matt:  true dat.  what are you guys doing after the funeral?
Jay:  probably just hang out, and play some yahtzee or something.
Matt:  HA!!
Jay:  shhhhhhhh
Matt:  ooooo….sorry, but it’s funny you say that, because Schmoop and I are currently playing monopoly.
Jay:  awwww, that’s nice.  board games like that bring people closer together.
Matt:  i love board games, especially at this holiday time of year with friends and family getting together.

Jay:  maybe we could talk about our all-time favorite games n’shit.
Matt:  AWESOME IDEA!!
Jay:  DAMN MATT….SHHHHHHHH.
Matt:  you too…shush…
Jay:  oh jeez…okay, i’m better now.  that was close…
Matt:  everything okay?
Jay:  yeah, i think perhaps that one freaky cousin i barely know heard me, but it’s all good.
Matt: okay.

Matt:  okay then…we’ll talk about the holidays and board games bringing us all together with jesus and each other…

Matt:  jay?

Jay:  sorry…rev. moneymaker is eulogizing.
Matt:  our rev. moneymaker?
Jay:  well sure…he’s already on staff…why pay for an outsider?
Matt:  wow…from now on when i think of you, i will think…cost-effective.
Jay:  hey, money doesn't grow on trees ya know, but in a way, board games do.
Matt:  good point.

Jay:  alright then…i think we are ready for the games people play show.
Matt:  yes we are.  it should be a huge one.
Jay:  but not nearly as huge as the life that my nana creta lived.
Matt:  word.  a good woman through and through.
Jay:  yes she was, and will be missed.

Matt and Jay:  AMEN!!

Matt and Jay:  OH SHIT!!  shhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

So folks, join IWS Radio LIVE this Sunday from Noon-2 PM ET as Jay and I discuss our favorite games, and as we discuss the wicked mind games that friends and family play throughout the holiday season.

To listen LIVE this Sunday, you can click right HERE!!  

Hump Day Hodgepodge

Cheeeeeeeers and Happy Hump Day Chuckleheads!!

A whole lotta nothing exciting going on around here, or is there?

Let’s find out, by just letting the personal headlines from my head ooze out onto the always artful pages of the IWS website.

Dateline…Commonwealth of Virginia…Headline reads…

Terry “I’m a Carpet Bagging Car Salesman” McAuliffe defeats Ken “Transvaginal Ultrasound” Cuccinelli to win the title of, Slightly Less Creepy of the Two Old Dominion Gubernatorial Candidates.

Dateline…Bagwine, Ohio Apartment 102...New Furnace Installed, Schmoop Gets Hot Just Looking at It.

The always cold IWS Radio bit player Schmoop, shone a rare smile today when she eyed a new Goodman furnace nestled snugly within the IWS Bagwine Studio.  Isn't it pretty?

Upon final installation of said furnace, she chirped…

“Sweet!!  Now I can quit using Matt-Man as a blanket, send him back to his couch, and get eight hours of quality, undisturbed sleep every night.  Praise Jeebus!!”

Sometimes when Schmoop speaks extemporaneously and I am within ear shot, it is quite hurtful, but…I sally forth, and hide my hurt and bitterness from her.  I only cry when she goes to work, or when I am at work, or…when she rests with a smile upon her face while I TYPE IN ANGER!!

Kidding, of course…sorta.

Anyhoo…

When I read my timeline on Twitter…I almost always say to myself, “America certainly does get the government she deserves.”

The tweets from the right and the left are enough to propel Hitler, Hindenburg, Stalin, and Trotsky to get along, and all the while asking each other…

“Let’s see if Roosevelt and Churchill would like to come over for drinks and a wicked game of charades.”

If America, any country, or the fragile sanity of the world is to survive, we all need to let go of this, “You’re either with me or against me” bullshit.

You know what’s funny?

Outraged TRUE conservatives like Sean Hannity and his tea bagging partiers want reform, and yet…

They cling like Socialists to the political meal ticket of the GOP.  They claim that they want reform, but don’t have the guts nor the electability to do it on their own, so?

They whine about their own party, which of course, they do “in no way belong”…

What?  Fucking pussies.

Left wing Democrats?  They are euphoric.  In spite of themselves and a President who couldn’t lead a baloney sandwich and a bag of pretzels from its paper bag into the mouth of a hungry, lunch-time sixth grader, celebrate the victory of last night’s elections.

What a joke.

Nobody cares about governing.  Nobody cares.  Left, Right, Conservative, or Liberal.  Nobody cares about you or I. Or about Peter, about Paul, about Shirley.  Ha!!

You thought I was going to say Mary, didn’t you?

Eh…Politicians just want to get re-elected, and folks like Hannity, Maddow, and others, just want to get ratings.

Many Americans want to be part of a winning team.  Whether it be a football team, a Baseball team, or sadly, a political party.

They want to win.  Unfortunately, while electioneering is a game of skill and chance, governing is not, and that is where Americans blow it.  A 51% to 49% vote total is not a win if the man or woman that we elected has no idea how to govern.

And lastly…

A shout-out to Jayman and his family, as oft time mentioned Nana Creta passed away yesterday afternoon at the age of 95.  I often made jokes about her longevity, and feel a missing of her already.

I dig anyone who can transcend the averages like she did, and am saddend by her passing.  So…

Pass your heart felt sympathies on to Jayman and his family today, if you would.  I am sure he would appreciate it.

Cheers!!

Matt-Man

Mattmaniws@ymail.com
@mattman_iws
My Facebook Page