Saturday, May 31, 2014

Clothing Optional Fun and Games with Matt and Jay

Matt chits, Jay chats, You listen skeptically.

Jay: Yo
Matt: Well hiya!
Jay: Hey guess what?
Matt: What??
Jay: I just checked the Comedy rankings and …
Matt: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand?
Jay: We’re numberrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Matt: I can’t take it! Tell me!
Matt: What the fuck?
Jay: I know right?
Matt: We’re behind that same guy?
Jay: Yup. He must have a HUGE audience.
Matt: I guess so.
Jay: Unless he’s gaming the system or something.
Matt: Impossible!
Jay: Can you jack your numbers up with HGH?
Matt: If you can we already would have. I mean would have HEARD HOW.
Jay: Exactly, but being number two is … I don’t know.
Matt: It leaves a bad taste in my mouth.
Jay: Like a hooker who just blew a guy who ate pineapples
Matt: Hahahahahaha … wut?

Jay: Remember when people were happy to slander Maya Angelou
Matt: Right up to the moment she died and suddenly she has no detractors.
Jay: What’s up with that!
Matt: I don’t know, but I’m not gonna put up with much longer.
Jay: It’s all pretty unseemly.
Matt: People are such frauds and Maya was a hack!
Jay: Most of the tributes posted on FB were by people who never read her works.
Matt: Totally. It was just “look at me! I’m a huge fan and so cultured!”
Jay: Worst of all it overshadowed the new Ariana Grande/Iggy Azalea song release.
Matt: Another outrage! Who are they?

Jay: We will have to get into this Maya Angelou thing Sunday.
Matt: Among other things!
Jay: It’s been a pretty busy week.
Matt: We can’t really focus on one thing.
Jay: There’s more on Donald Sterling.
Matt: And the Eliot Rodger shootings.
Jay: And his manifesto.
Matt: And this Jenny Johnson chick.
Jay: Is she a racist or just doing comedy?
Matt: A complicated subject.
Jay: One that only trained professionals should discuss.
Matt: Oh shit. There’s also this #YesAllWomen thing.
Jay: Hashtag activism at its most confusing.
Matt: We’ll have to analyze that thoroughly.
Jay: As only we can!
Matt: Aaaaaaaaaaaand it’s time Jay.
Jay: Everything is ready? Renovations are complete?
Matt: Definitely. Let’s tell everyone about our new retreat.
Jay: The Hodgepodge Lodge.
Matt: It’s an immaculate and soothing escape for the IWS family.
Jay: So much to do there!
Matt: Everyone is going to love.
Jay: There’s tons more to talk about too.
Matt: And lots of stories to tell.
Jay: I think we’re ready!
Matt: Hell yeah!

So, be sure to tune into “Homespun Fun at Hodgepodge Lodge” on IWS Radio Sunday at 12 Noon ET!! 


I'm With Stupid said...

Backwoods, risque comedy at its finest. We're going full frontal on this episode. Cheers Jayman!!


jAMiE said...

I knew I should have waited until morning to read know, when my stomach hopefully settled down and I was not glued to the bathroom floor....but I didn't..and you talked about the hooker who blew a guy who had eaten pineapple....and well it just about set everything off again.

Thanks guys.
#chemo sucks.
Can we do hashtags here?

jAMiE said...

ps...i need to book a room at the Hodgepodge Lodge, asap...please.

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