Your Favorite Everything Sucks and Quit Being So Sensitive

Hola all you people with really crummy taste! You know? Something that always amazes me about people is how upset they get if someone doesn’t like what they like. I don’t know why they get so upset if I’m not a fan of the same music or movie or TV show or sports team or whatever that they are. It’s not personal y’all!

Anytime I mention that I don’t like today’s country music someone invariably will say “Well I guess you don’t like me either because I’m a big fan of country music.” Why would they think that? Why do I have to like country music to like them, or be their friend? Do I have to like EVERY SINGLE SINGER AND MUSICIAN who considers themselves “country?”

I get that there are a lot of a-holes out there who hate everyone and everything. It is kind of exhausting having them show up all the time to make sure that you know that they hate whatever it is you like. If you post “Man, that was a great episode of last night,” it seems like there’s always somebody there to tell you that the show you mentioned sucks. I get it. It does get old.

If you notice though, it’s pretty much the same people making the negative comments all the time. It’s the same people who care so little about the Super Bowl (or The Oscars or whatever big event is on at the time) that they have to go on Facebook and Twitter several times to let everyone know that they don’t care. As if WE care. But, like I said, those grumpy, bitchy, whiny people always hate everything. You expect it. Or you should anyway.

What I’m talking about are people who ask me if I liked, say, the show “Friends.” I will say “No, I never found it all that funny.” It’s amazing how often people take that as a personal attack. Almost a “HOW DARE YOU?!”

Art, like beauty is subjective. We have our likes and dislikes and sometimes we like things that are very popular. Sometimes we like things that result in being mocked by our friends. People constantly criticize me for being a Miley Cyrus fan. I can’t help it. She pisses people off and I find it hilarious mostly because they can seem to explain WHY they’re so pissed at her.

I’ve actually met people who don’t like “The Godfather” movies. No really! And I’ve met people who didn’t like “Goodfellas.” I worry about these people sometimes, but I respect their opinion no matter how messed up it is. I’ve also met people who think “The Bill Engval Show” was hilarious. Again, that’s a bit whack, but okay.

The weirdest thing to me is when people apply this crazy attitude to sports. I don’t get why they think I should be a fan of their team and are hurt when I’m not. Seriously, there are people out there who are genuinely personally hurt and offended when I don’t root for their team, when they’re playing MY team. I call these people “Kentucky Basketball Fans.” Fascinating group of people, many of whom I love very much, but they should probably be studied by a sociologist and a psychologist and other –ogists.

Of course this same phenomenon applies to politics, but it’s a little different there. People are beholden to their partisan political beliefs and can’t stand to have their world view challenged. Plus, anyone who disagrees with them hates America or is a racist or both and it goes and on and on and on.

Anyway, quit taking it so personally when someone doesn’t like what you like. Also, quit being an asshole hating on everything and everybody all the time. Oh and if you don’t like the TV show “Justified” you are probably the dumbest, most pathetic idiot that has ever lived. Just kidding! Kind of.

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