Matt talks, Jay talks, You listen.
Schmoop: Hiaya! Jay: Huh .. Uh … What are you wearing?
Schmoop: A t-shirt .. AND NOTHING ELSE!
Jay: Whoa!
Schmoop: Hello?
Jay: *heavy breating*
Schmoop: Are you there?
Jay: *grunts* …. *more heavy breating*
Schmoop: Uhhhhhh … What are you doing??
Jay: What?
Schmoop: What were you doing sicko?
Jay: What? I dropped my pen and couldn’t reach it.
Schmoop: Oh, okay. Here’s Matt
Matt: Cheers!
Jay: Hola!
Matt: How’s you?
Jay: Excellent! How’s you?
Matt: *sigh* It’s been a rough week. Rough TWO weeks actually.
Jay: I know it has Pookie.
Matt: Thank you for your support.
Jay: You’re totally welcome.
Jay: Hey! Kim and Kanye named their kid …
Matt: Stop.
Jay: North!
Matt: Stop!
Jay: No really, they named it North West.
Matt: Maybe the full name is Northby North West
Jay: Or North South Easton West
Matt: Maybe actual FULL name is Pacific North West?
Jay: I guess there’s always Westby North West too.
Matt:
Jay: You there?
Matt: Are we done with these people?
Jay: Yeah
Matt: Then I’m here.
Jay: Oh, okay then.
Jay: North!
Matt: Stop!
Jay: No really, they named it North West.
Matt: Maybe the full name is Northby North West
Jay: Or North South Easton West
Matt: Maybe actual FULL name is Pacific North West?
Jay: I guess there’s always Westby North West too.
Matt:
Jay: You there?
Matt: Are we done with these people?
Jay: Yeah
Matt: Then I’m here.
Jay: Oh, okay then.
Matt: Why do I have David Carradine in my notes?
Jay: Shit, I don’t know.
Matt: It had to have something to do with the show.
Jay: Oh you wrote him down in your SHOW NOTES!
Matt: Well yeah, I’m a professional, you know?
Jay: True. I guess we talked about Erotic Asphyxiation or Thai Hookers.
Matt: That doesn’t sound like us at all.
Jay: IKR? Maybe Kung-Fu TV show?
Matt: That show was a classic!
Jay: Totally!
Matt: But that couldn’t be it.
Jay: Hmmm … Well I got nothing then.
Matt: Strike David Carradine off the list then!
Jay: OHHHHH! Vacation activities.
Matt: Really? THAT was one of the vacation activities we talked about?
Jay: Well, there were other things too.
Matt: God, I hope so.
Jay: Shit, I don’t know.
Matt: It had to have something to do with the show.
Jay: Oh you wrote him down in your SHOW NOTES!
Matt: Well yeah, I’m a professional, you know?
Jay: True. I guess we talked about Erotic Asphyxiation or Thai Hookers.
Matt: That doesn’t sound like us at all.
Jay: IKR? Maybe Kung-Fu TV show?
Matt: That show was a classic!
Jay: Totally!
Matt: But that couldn’t be it.
Jay: Hmmm … Well I got nothing then.
Matt: Strike David Carradine off the list then!
Jay: OHHHHH! Vacation activities.
Matt: Really? THAT was one of the vacation activities we talked about?
Jay: Well, there were other things too.
Matt: God, I hope so.
Jay: So that’s what we’re talking about this week right?
Matt: Deviant sex acts? Jay: No, vacations and summer
Matt: Right! Summer celebration and stuff.
Jay: Yeah, the Ratchet Summer Show
Matt: What does “ratchet” mean.
Jay: Not really sure, but the kids use that word all the time.
Matt: Is it something like “off the hook?” or “Cray-Cray?”
Jay: Yeahhhhh .. Something like that, but more dirty and nasty.
Matt: Oh. Well okay then. We’ll do it for the kids.
Jay: And the ratings.
Matt: Mostly the ratings.
Jay: So summer vacations
Matt: Local tourist attractions!
Jay: Road trips and roadside attractions!
Matt: Family vacations as when we were kids.
Jay: Oh yeah.
Matt: Summer activities.
Jay: Places we would like to go!
Matt: OH … Something else I have to do!
Jay: Okay, I’ll wait.
Matt: No on the show! A Slim Whitman tribute.
Jay: Well of course!
Matt: Definitely.
Jay: Also Poet’s Corner?
Matt: Oh hell yeah.
Jay: And maybe some tourism related sponsors.
Matt: Brilliant!
Jay: And a Summer Move Blockbuster!
Matt: Can’t wait!
Jay: Oh yeah, we’re ready for greatness!
Matt: Always!
Be sure to listen to the Ratchet Summer Show on I’m With
Stupid Sunday at 12 Noon ET!! It’s gonna be HUGE!
3 comments:
Could one of those two lassies be a young nurse Ratchet?
People will get a good tan just by listening to this show. Cheers!!
Matt-Man
"North West" really leaves the door open for further cool kid names.
I'm kidding. South West is pretty much the only thing left.
Which is fine, because there's not a thinking and breathing soul on earth who believes these two proud parents are going to be together for more than one more kid.
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