Saturday, February 9, 2013

Matt Said, Jay Said, Helen Hunt Naked


Matt speaks, Jay speaks, You listen (kinda).

Matt: Helloooooooooooooooooo
Jay: *sings* “I wanna sex you up”
Matt: Uh
Jay: *sings* “You make me feel good”
Matt: I do? … Ummm …
Jay: *sings* “I wanna rub you down …”
Matt: OKAY THAT’S ENOUGH!
Jay: Am I making you uncomfortable?
Matt: Eve more than usual.
Jay: Aww yeah!
Matt: STOP! JESUS DUDE!
Jay: You know you’re turned on.
Matt: I hate you.
Jay: That really hurts.
Matt: I know, but it was necessary.
Jay: I don’t think it was.

Matt: Hey. Whatever happened to Helen Hunt?
Jay: Random question is random!
Matt: Well, for some reason I thought of her this morning.
Jay: She was great in “As Good as it Gets”
Matt: One of my favorite movies.
Jay: Anyway, Helen Hunt?
Matt: I love her and she just disappeared.
Jay: She just had a movie come out this year.
Matt: Really? What was it about.
Jay: She plays some kind of sex therapist.
Matt: Really?
Jay: Wait … Actually a sex SURROGATE.
Matt: REAAAAAAAALLLLLLY?
Jay: And ... She gets all kinds of nekkid in that movie!
Matt: Nice! Totally nude?
Jay: Full-Frontal dude! And she looks amazing for her age.
Matt: Her age?
Jay: Yeah, she’s like late 50’s near 60 right?
Matt: No way!
Jay: *checks Google* She’s 49.
Matt: Yeah, see? Not nearly that old.
Jay: She doesn’t look that great for her age then.
Matt: Now that was hurtful!
Jay: Ha! I’m kidding! She’s gorgeous.
Matt: Damn right!

Jay: Got any ideas for the show?
Matt: Nope. You?
Jay: We could talk about writing again.
Matt: That’s not bad.
Jay: Actually last time we talked more about books and authors and not writing.
Matt: Right. We can talk about OUR writing.
Jay: Things that inspire us.
Matt: Different styles.
Jay: Our hopes
Matt: And dreams!
Jay: The whole writing process.
Matt: It fits with my post on Friday.
Jay: And all our “Favorite and Least Favorite Words” stuff.
Matt: Oh God it’s brilliant!
Jay: So good it hurts.
Matt: Don’t get weird on me again.
Jay: I gotta be me.
Matt: Well … I guess.
Jay: Thanks.
Matt: Whatever.
Jay: Okay, we’re all set!
Matt: Monster show coming up!
Jay: Should I sing on the show?
Matt: Never.
Jay: So, Sooooo hurtful.
Matt: It’s for your own good.
Jay: I guess.
Matt: Okay, let’s do it!
Jay: AWESOME!

Okay kids. More brilliance in action. Or something like that. Anyway, listen to “On Writing Deux” Saturday night at 11 PM ET on I’m With Stupid!!!

5 comments:

Mike said...

Well I just learned something new about Google images. Thanks Jay.

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eViL pOp TaRt said...

I didn't know Helen Hunt posed nude!

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Jo said...

Rene went to school with her. I think she's a shrew but I still give her props for being publicly naked for a really long time.

"Surrogate" is a really gross word.