Monday, January 14, 2013

People I've Had Enough Of

Hola y’all! Man, some people are really getting on my nerves lately. Here’s a short list of the people who are pissing me off the most right now…

- People on Twitter who tweet about something awesome but don’t link to it. Cause linking to it is anti-hipster or something. Every day I see shit like this:

“OMG! Dr. Peter Wankmeoffer has written an amazing article on Gawker about the scourge of decency laws! You should read it!”
If it’s so freaking amazing then link to it! What’s even worse is if you go to Dr. Wankmeoffer’s Twitter page you’ll see that he’s RT’d all the people who have heaped praise on him, but not any links to his own damn article.

- Gorgeous women who post amazingly gorgeous pics of themselves on Social Media and say things like “Ugh! I’m such a mess today!” or “I can’t find any good pics of myself.” Jesus this is so annoying. I know! I know! I can’t say anything to them because they’re all suffering from bad self-esteem caused by skinny hot chicks on the cover of magazines and shit. So, I just let it go even though it pisses me the hell off.

- People who use their phone for virtually everything social media related but bitch about its limitations. I saw a report from CES about a watch that will notify you that you have email. The lady showing the watch off said “This way you don’t have to go to the trouble of getting your phone out if it isn’t an urgent email.” Really? Now it’s too much effort to check your phone? It’s bad enough that all these people tweet me with “Hey, can you email me that link you just tweeted? I’m on my phone” because they’re too freaking lazy to open the laptop sitting next to them.

- Anne Hathaway’s pretentious short hair. Enough already! Let your hair grow back out and stop taking yourself so God-Damned seriously.

- People debating the $1 Trillion Dollar Coin. Yeah, it might be a silly idea, but basically it’s a silly response to straight up irresponsible assholes in Congress. Worst of all are the people claiming that the government would have to mint a coin the side of the Empire State Building. Uh, you might notice that the $20 bill isn’t 20 times bigger than the $1 bill. Also, it didn’t take $100 worth of material to make a $100 moron.

And what about all the mint it would take to “mint a coin that size?” Would there be any left over for the Mint Juleps at the Kentucky Derby? Would the government use so much mint that they created a supply shortage that resulted in a huge increase in the price of mint? Nobody thought of that DID THEY?

- People who take it personally when I don’t like what or who they like. This one has always mystified me. Do you really think it’s necessary for us ALL to like the same music, movies, TV shows, etc…? How boring would that be? It just amazes me how many people get upset when I make a truthful statement like “Taylor Swift sucks.” There are always people who respond with something like “Well, I guess you think I suck too because I like her.”

No, I think your taste in music sucks, it’s not the same thing.

- Delusional sports fans who think that the only way their team ever loses a game is because the “refs cheated” or the refs were “out to get them.” Just take your ass whippings like grown-ups and shut up people!

Oh and by the way …. You had NOTHING to do with YOUR team’s win so stop taking personal credit for it.

Same goes to Southeastern Conference fans. Alabama’s BCS Championship is NOT yours, it’s theirs. If you’re a fan of another SEC school and you are celebrating Bama’s win because your team is in the same conference, you are a fucking moron.

I could go on, and on, and on. But, I won’t.



I'm With Stupid said...

I like your post because it means that although a Notre Dame fan, I had nothing to do with their ass-whipping...Thanks, I was worried that maybe I had done something wrong. Y'know, being quasi-on the team and all like other rabid college fans. Cheers Jayman!!


Mike said...

The trillion dollar coin would have to be a least the size of a sewer lid. Just so so asshole couldn't say it was lost.

And see what happens when you wear a tie. You lose you brains out your ear holes.

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JesseFerg said...

No, don't stop!! Keep going!! This is a side of the Jayman I like to see!!

I agree with you on Anne Hathaway, even though she's still the "oh god the things I'd do to her if she wasn't married" kind of hot!

I'm With Stupid said...

Matt-Man: Oh that loss was totally your fault.


I'm With Stupid said...

Mike: They would keep the Trillion Dollar Coin in the briefcase with all the launch codes.


I'm With Stupid said...

Jesse: A man only has so much anger in him.


Edita said...

Wait... Am I secretly on the list with invisible ink? Probz.

And I totally agree about the Anne H thing. I hope she grows her hair.


I'm With Stupid said...

Edita: Noooooooo ... You are on my People I Can't Get Enough Of List!!